Good Enough
by Rosalyn Angel
Summary: [AU, AxelRiku] Sometimes love doesn't need to be completely overwhelming. Sometimes, it just needs to be good enough. [complete]
1. September

**Author's Notes: **Here I go! About time I've worked on another chapter story. As soon as I finished playing KH2, I wanted to write something about Riku and Axel. (Because, honestly, do you know how _awesome_ they'd be together?) After a week or two of rolling the idea in my head and outlining everything, it's finally started!

Yes, yes, another college AU… but I'd like for it to be somehow different. For one: the pairing (obviously), and another: the content. I'm such a sucker for character development that there's going to be more to this than just the two main characters pairing up. I hope. XD It's not going to be anything really super dramatic, or even much crack!humor, but hopefully it'll be a nice, fun story.

I'm planning for twelve chapters total, one for each month in the year. The chapters may vary in length, but there will be twelve. Also, I'm assuming this AU is set in some obscure place and time in America, because they have American holidays. Fun stuff.

Last thing: my Riku is based pretty much on his KH2 self. More quiet and sullen than in KH1.

Tired of my rambling? Read on!

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter one- September**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

Traverse University had it all.

Over seventy-five majors, more than thirty clubs, dorms for underclassmen, apartments for upper, financial aid able to cover complete tuition, options for studying abroad, teachers who make it their _priority_ to give personal attention to students who come from all over the country, and a "beautiful suburban campus surrounded by trees and houses"…

He looked up from the brochure he had been skimming to see if it were true or not.

There it was. His home for the upcoming semesters.

Axel Hitzig suddenly felt small.

The main building had columns fit for a medieval castle, and its brick walls stretched out far and wide, decorated by numerous windows on each of the four floors. In front were flagpoles, donned by many different symbols, all color and pride rustling in the mid-September breeze. Pine trees spotting the green yard gave the air a crisp smell, while the other trees were turning their fall colors and beginning to litter the ground. There was also a huge stone fountain in front, with layered waterspouts and a ledge to sit on. And that was only _one_ building—there were others, both near and off in the distance, for different subjects and purposes. Some were beautiful and Victorian, while others were newer and plain, more geared toward practicality than aesthetics.

Students, young and old, were filtering in and out of the main building's massive double doors. A few sat to the side on concrete steps or benches, talking between themselves, reading, or just lazily lounging back with their eyes closed. There were book bags, headphones, arms full of class texts, smiles, frowns, and the widest variety of clothing Axel had ever seen.

"Wow," he heard from behind as a car door opened. "This is a lot bigger than that community college you went to, huh?"

Axel looked back with a smirk and saw his friend Hayner staring at an attractive woman walking by. "Hey, it's nothing I can't handle."

Hayner's brow lowered after she disappeared into her car and drove away. His eyes went back to Axel and his ever-present black hoodie. "I give it two days before you're hopelessly lost."

"Your lack of confidence wounds me!"

Hayner rolled his eyes as Axel motioned his heart being ripped out, and then nodded to their cars. "C'mon, get back in. We need to find your dorm and drop all this junk off."

Axel's hand pulsed as if it were holding his poor, wounded organ. "Right, right. It's in the Moomba Hall, number 214. Closest parking lot is…" He stuck his imaginary heart back in place and studied the campus map. "… Lot J."

"Lot J," Hayner repeated as the two boys separated for their respective cars. Both were started up, and they moved on.

Axel had Hayner help him move his belongings to his new dorm room at Traverse University. They knew each other from high school, two years back. Axel was a transfer student to Traverse, having been unable to attend a larger university until the scholarships slowly built up enough money.

And so here he was, cruising down the small avenue roads, past the Victorian buildings and pedestrian students, with two trunks and backseats jammed pack with things he deemed necessary and Hayner deemed junk. He was ready for a new start in his junior year of college, ready for the people, the sights, the lessons, and maybe even the homework. Maybe.

Well, at least it was interesting to meet your rooming buddy.

* * *

The sound of Aladdin's voice belting out chords of _A Whole New World _alerted Riku that his cell phone was ringing.

He stepped between the half-unpacked boxes, reaching the desk where the phone was shaking, and checked the number displayed on the front. Below the digits was the name _Sora_ in bold. Smiling, he answered, "Hello?"

"_Riku! Are you moved in yet? Classes start in a couple of days!"_

Riku held the phone a short distance from his ear as Sora loudly blurted out his name. He looked back at the half-occupied room. "Yeah, I'm pretty much in. Leon and Cloud helped."

"_Has your roommate shown yet?"_

"No," he answered, shuffling back to the bunker bed and sitting down. "Not yet."

"_I hope he's better than last year's; you guys were so different and you always seemed stressed because he kept you awake so much and you couldn't study well and…"_

Sora's happy voice overtook the conversation. Riku gave a few answers when asked, and he smiled and laughed because Sora was so energetic and cute that it was hard _not_ to.

Though they went to the same college, their interests were so different, that it was hard scheduling classes together. And since Sora commuted, phone calls and online chatting were the most common form of contact.

That, and Sora always seemed busy.

"Hey, Sora," Riku skillfully interjected into the brunet's rant of how his summer had gone. He had taken to lying back on the lower bunker, the small cell phone held between his shoulder and ear. "You want to do something tonight? I'm almost done unpacking, and we haven't seen each other in a while."

Sora abruptly stopped talking. The short span of silence seemed longer to Riku than it actually was. "_Sorry, Riku, but I already promised Kairi we'd do something…"_

Sora was always busy.

Riku's contented smile was quickly fading. His voice became quieter. "Hey, don't worry about it. Maybe some other time, yeah?"

"_I'm really sorry, Riku."_ He could almost see the sad blue eyes on Sora's pouting face.

"It's okay, you goof," he reassured, trying to sound light-hearted. "Girls demand a lot of attention, huh?"

Apparently he succeeded. Sora laughed; it rang through the earpiece. "_Seriously! But she's really fun and pretty. And we've known each other for so long!"_

_Not as long as I've known you._ "Seems like more trouble than it's worth to me."

"_Rikuuuu, don't be so glum about it! You really need to get a boyfriend. I bet you'd understand then."_

Riku's eyes were searching the bottom of the top bunker, the metal springs and wooden frame. He wasn't sure what was so interesting. His ear was getting sore. "I think I'll pass," he muttered.

"_But—"_ There was a shuffling from the phone, and a distant shout. He heard Sora yell back with the phone held away before he returned. "_Hey, I gotta go. Kairi's here. I'll talk to you later, all right?"_

"Sure," Riku said. "Later."

The line was cut, and Riku flipped the phone shut. He remained lying on the bed for a few moments longer, arms spread out, gazing up at nothing in particular.

He didn't mind that Sora was always so busy. He just wished it were with him, every once in a while.

Riku got up, grabbed his jacket, and went out.

* * *

After speaking with the Resident Advisor, Hayner had helped Axel bring in the boxes and assorted stuff, but left the unpacking undone, opting to drive back home. Now Axel was alone in a dorm. He could see belongings that weren't his, but the corresponding roommate was nowhere in sight.

But whoever he was, he sure did have a sweet laptop.

On both sides of the small dorm was mirrored furniture. Each occupant had a desk, chair, and dresser along opposite, gray walls. To the back wall was the bunk bed. Axel was quick to throw his backpack up to claim the top.

After the long drive, he just wanted to stretch and bury himself into the white sheets. His things weren't going anywhere, and the single window showed the sun lowering beneath the house-spattered horizon.

The black hoodie was shed and tossed unceremoniously onto the floor, falling between a box full of compact discs and his stereo. Without bothering to change clothes, he climbed up the little ladder and flopped onto the bed.

New bed. New ceiling.

Axel stayed on top of the covers. One arm haphazardly hanging off the bedside, he closed his eyes.

* * *

The short walk had cleared Riku's mind. The fresh air and colored leaves had taken his thoughts off unwanted things. Honestly, he should be used to it by now. Sora had been with Kairi for some time. He still remembered Sora's cheerful blabber over the phone about how they had gotten together.

Riku had been genuinely happy for his best friend. It was good to see Sora so ecstatic. He had been happy for him. He was _still_ happy for him.

It wasn't as if he had a chance in the first place.

Riku moved to unlock his dorm, but found it already open. His brow furrowed. This year's roommate must've finally come by.

The door slowly swung open and he stepped inside, locking it out of habit. He hoped his roommate would be the same. He had a lot of expensive things, and was taught to always be careful with them.

Turning, he saw boxes filling the wooden floor, leaving little room for walking space. A black hoodie was splayed besides a stereo. Dread filled him. He didn't need another person who cranked up their music.

Then he saw him. Or rather, he saw the pale arm that hung over the side of the top bunker.

_Must be sleeping._ He stepped over the cluttered space, hanging his jacket over his chair and placing his keys and phone back onto the desk. The metal clinks of the keys made the person on the bed stir.

"Mmph," he heard a groan. "Whoiszat?"

Riku looked over his shoulder and saw a long, tired face with droopy green eyes and mussed, spiky red hair peeking over the bedside.

"Roommate," Riku explained simply.

After his vision adjusted to the now-dark of the room, Axel squinted and caught the faint sheen of long, silver hair. "Name's Axel," he replied, yawning. "Get it memorized."

Riku looked away. Axel hadn't the manners of covering his mouth. "Right." By the time he looked back, Axel had already lied down again.

Nothing more was said. Riku quietly finished unpacking and got ready for bed. If Axel woke up again, he didn't show it.

Riku didn't expect much to come out of this year. Not in this place.

After all, their first meeting had been nothing special.

* * *

Axel's cell phone was what roused him the next morning. Blindly he fumbled around in his khakis until he was able to yank the offending device out and shove it next to his ear. "What?" he grumbled.

"_My, my, aren't we Mr. Grouchy?"_

"Larxene," he rolled the name off his tongue, along with the sticky morning taste in his mouth. "Shove it, okay?"

He heard Larxene's haughty laugh. "_I take it you're settled in?"_

Axel turned his head to the side. Oh, right. Boxes. "Sure."

"_Don't your classes start tomorrow?"_

"Hey, I'm working on it." He sat up, careful not to bump his head on the ceiling. Swinging his legs over, he hopped off the bed with a loud _thunk_. He wondered if he woke up his roommate, but upon searching, he found the bed and room were empty.

"_I bet your lazy ass hasn't done _anything _yet."_

Axel had met and befriended Larxene at the community college. While he had transferred, she had stayed. She was about the only person he cared to keep in contact with from there.

Even if she woke him up to give him shit.

Exchanging more insulting, dry humor, Axel began to move around and arrange his things. Half the room was already taken, the one with the window; he almost wished he had come earlier so he could've had that desk.

It had been hard, though, leaving his old town and friends. He also had to leave behind any chance, however small, of seeing Roxas.

Not that they talked much, anymore.

But he digressed. It was a new day. After waking up further, he went on to explain the sheer expanse of the campus, and upon Larxene's question, said that yes, he _had_ seen a number of cute guys…

* * *

"I don't believe it. I think Leon is _embarrassed_."

Riku looked between the two seniors with a small, amused smile. They sat in a cafeteria booth, conversing idly and picking at their lunch. Leon and Cloud were both easy to be around—their quiet natures suited Riku fine. Cloud, however, often took to calmly teasing the stoic Leon.

Riku didn't know how long the two men had known each other, but he had met them in his freshman year. After being paired together for a class project, they had become steady friends.

"Whatever," Leon said in monotone, arms crossed and staring at the tiled floor. He sat slouched, next to Cloud, while Riku sat opposite.

Cloud was smirking, blue eyes darkly lit. He tried to get Leon to look at him, voice deep and teasing. "I know you can't take compliments well. It must be so hard, stuck with two attractive gay men like us." His hand was comforting on Leon's shoulder, but his smirk was directed at Riku, who was having trouble hiding his smile.

Leon stared at the appendage like it was the plague. "Cloud."

Cloud's blond eyebrow rose. "Hm?"

"I never want you to touch me. Rinoa—"

Cloud's hand withdrew sadly. But it was an act. They did this all the time. "Rinoa means more to you now? Is that it?"

Leon sighed, his brown bangs swinging in front of his eyes. He looked to have the entire weight of the world on his leather-clad shoulders.

"Leave him alone, Cloud," Riku said, grinning and sipping on his soda. "I think that's enough for now."

They all knew Leon didn't mind. Maybe even found it funny, or flattering. It was just hard to see the quirk of a smile in his gray eyes, unless you really looked for it.

"No classes together this semester," Cloud said, looking at their schedules in the middle of the table. He mindlessly stuck a French fry in his mouth. "Leon and I are already done with all the underclassmen courses… Geez, Riku, you're taking eighteen credit hours again?"

Riku's head hung slightly. "I want out of here as soon as possible."

Leon gave a quiet, disapproving grunt. They translated it as being concerned for Riku's sanity.

"It's not that hard," Riku defended himself. His soda was almost empty. "I can't help that I'm naturally gifted."

"You're so confident," Cloud mused, sliding the schedule back to its owner. "And overachieving."

"Some people consider that a _good_ thing, you know."

The food was depleted after a while. They began to pick up the trash.

"Anything planned the rest of the day?" Cloud asked, sucking up the last remains of his drink before tossing it away.

Riku brushed his hands off and stuck them into his baggy jean pockets. "Not really."

"Leon and I are going to go see a movie. You should come along."

Leon was already walking to the door, waving his hand without looking back. They translated it as a _hurry up or I'm leaving without you. And I'll take the car, too._

Riku smiled lightly. "Yeah. Okay."

"Good." Cloud clapped his hand on Riku's back once as they followed Leon out. "_Someone_ has to get you to relax…"

* * *

Axel spent the rest of the day getting to know the campus grounds. After becoming accustomed to his class' locations, and also nearby restaurants (which he tried out), he purchased his textbooks and trudged back to his dorm.

'_Get hopelessly lost', my ass. That'll show Hayner._

Too bad Hayner was several hours away, along with everyone else. He'd have to get used to not being close to old family and friends.

He stumbled up the stairs to the second floor of the Moomba Hall, and looked at each door until he found number 214 again. The books were heavy in his camouflage backpack, not to mention on his wallet—

He somehow managed to wrestle the door open and slip inside, letting the pack collide to the floor.

It was still empty of life. He wondered if he had dreamed about his roommate last night.

He went through his luggage and stacked the empty boxes, carelessly tossing them into the single closet. After that, he collapsed into his chair, staring at his cheap laptop before switching it on and configuring it with the dorm's wireless Internet.

Hayner, Pence, and Olette were online. He hadn't really expected to see anyone else.

_SnickerBar: hey axel, hayner told us ur at traverse now. when do u think ull come back?_

Pence invited him to their chat first. He had known these three all through high school, along with Roxas. Last year, however, Roxas had moved to a college far away and lost contact. He wondered if the other three thought the same thing would happen with him.

_FireGod: Hey, man, no worries. I'll be back winter break._

_Hay21: who's worrying!_

_Olette: hayner, be nice._

Axel laughed and quickly typed his reply.

_FireGod: I know you all miss my sexy ass._

After only hearing the _tap-tap-tap_ of the keyboard for a while, he plugged in his headphones. He didn't pay attention to how much time passed talking with the trio. It was easy to lose track of the hours.

Axel twisted in his chair and slid his headphones off when he heard the doorknob rattle. His roommate stepped in, frowning at the lock.

"S'up," Axel greeted casually. Okay, so he hadn't been dreaming. The kid really did have silver hair.

"Hey," the other said, clicking the bolt in place. His voice was low and quiet, but sure of itself. When the boy turned, Axel saw a hint of light blue in the fine strands. "Can you keep the door locked?"

One look at that laptop and Axel understood why. "Yeah, no problem."

"Thanks."

Axel waited for him to say something more, but all he did was fold his white jacket on his bed and disappear into the bathroom.

_SnickerBar: hey u there?_

_FireGod: Yeah, sorry. roommate just walked in._

_Olette: how is he?_

_FireGod: yanno, I can't really tell. He hasn't said much._

_Olette: is he cute?_

_Hay21: man i hate it when you two talk about guys._

_SnickerBar: lol poor hay._

_Hay21: shut up_

Axel smirked.

_FireGod: Well, he does have nice hair._

* * *

Riku came out from the shower in his nightclothes—a grey t-shirt and sweatpants—with damp hair. Axel smiled at him (i.e., _I come in peace_), then returned to his laptop.

As soon as Riku had situated himself on his bed with a book, Axel spoke up:

"So, what's your name?"

Riku looked to the side to see Axel's headphones on the desk. The computer screen gave his face an odd glow. Riku knew he'd be living with this Axel for two semesters, so he had to be pleasant. "Riku Yokuya."

Upon further inspection, Axel could see the small slant in Riku's eyes. "That's cool. Riku," he tried the name out, mouth curling around the 'oo'. "Nice to meet you."

Riku wasn't inclined to become friendly to new people quickly. He settled his eyes on the page and hoped Axel got the idea. "Likewise."

Axel frowned, but turned to his keyboard anyway.

_FireGod: This guy is quiet._

_SnickerBar: gonna b a fun year?_

Hayner and Olette had gone to bed; classes started for them early morning. Pence was just an Internet geek.

_FireGod: Oh, you know me. I'll _make _it fun._

* * *

Riku was gone before Axel woke up again. He had morning classes—specifically Figure Drawing.

He sat on his selected horse: a wooden bench that allowed him to prop up a drawing board and pad. Naminé, a sweet blond girl he met the previous semester, was across from him.

Their first assignment was to pair up and draw each other's portraits. Riku had gone to her right away; she was too shy to approach him. There was no one in the class he'd rather be with. Everyone else cluttered around and made their groups, chatting while working, and the instructor roamed and observed. The medium used was optional—Riku selected charcoal, while Naminé used her beloved pastels.

When he had gotten the base lines of her face onto the newsprint paper, she smiled up at him and said softly, "How've you been, Riku?"

She was so nice and tiny and cute. It was hard not to like her as a person. "All right," he said, giving his sketch darker strokes. The charcoal crumbled off in little bits down the page.

Her wide, light blue eyes flitted between his face and her drawing. "Have you decided on your major yet?"

Riku took a moment to answer. "Not yet."

Her hand held the green pastel stick tightly, smudging it into the blue. She always started on the eyes first. Especially his. "Why not art?"

He finished outlining her hair sweeping around her shoulder. "I like it," he started, "but I'm not sure if that's what I want."

Naminé studied him carefully. It always amazed him, her level of understanding. All it took her was a few questions. "Then what do you _know_ you want, Riku?"

So his reply didn't startle her. That's why he had been so comfortable around her the first time. She just smiled peacefully, nodded, and continued drawing. He couldn't help but feel that she had already guessed.

His eyes strayed to look out the window. "I know I want out of here."

It was hard to concentrate on the portrait after that.

* * *

The days passed slowly. Autumn came full-blow, with colored leaves littering the ground and leaving the trees bare. They crunched under footsteps and brushed along the pavement in the wind. Students attended classes, teachers taught, and friends hung out. It was a normal time.

Axel attempted a few more times to get his roommate to speak up. Riku answered politely, but that was the extent of it. When they were home at the same time, they did their things on their sides of the dorm, separate. Eventually, Axel shrugged and went on his way. He'd meet other people soon enough. As long as Riku and he weren't at each other's throats, he could live.

Nothing special ever really happened.

**-September, end**


	2. October

**Author's Notes:** For those worried about the heterosexual couples (like Leon/Rinoa): No worries. They're off-screen. At _most_, they'll be mentioned… except for Sora/Kairi, as it will have importance for later chapters. Mwah.

F.Y.I.: I am not detailing every day of the month. No way. I'm just picking out the important scenes. So, don't assume all these events are happening _right_ after each other, unless it's obvious that they are. Woo for time passage!

I'll be replying to those who leave signed reviews. This review reply system is great! So remember to sign in before reviewing, if you can.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter two- October**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

There were certain unwritten rules that roommates were expected to follow. For example: do not touch your roommate's electronics. Do not let your stuff cross the invisible line in the middle. Do not keep your roommate awake at night. Do not try to play your music above your roommate's (headphones are preferred). Do not look over your roommate's shoulder. Do not hog the bathroom…

Riku and Axel were relatively good at following these rules. They knew not to cross the other's boundaries. As long as they kept their distance, a year's time of living together would go smoothly. They could remain mere acquaintances, neither liking nor disliking. For Riku, that was fine. He had his friends already, so it didn't matter either way. It was fine for Axel, too. Although Riku's attitude put him off a little, he wasn't one to push anything if the other was disinterested.

There were times, however, when complications arose—when their interests would clash, and they'd have a brief interlude where they actually spoke.

In these times, they learned about each other in some miniscule way.

_Do not hog the bathroom._

On Tuesday and Thursday, Axel and Riku had morning classes at the same time. Axel was slow to wake up, so Riku was always able to claim the shower first. Axel had to sit on the bed in his pajama pants, a towel slung over his shoulder, and stare at his digital watch. It ticked by slowly.

The water was shut off, and he heard rummaging inside the bathroom. Standing up, he waited in front of the closed door and tapped his foot. Finally Riku emerged, hair half-wet but dressed for the day.

Riku learned that when Axel was irritated, he became sarcastic.

"Are you done caressing your lovelocks?"

Axel learned that Riku, although quiet, wasn't one to back down.

"At least I make an effort."

Axel gave a dry, fake laugh as Riku brushed past. Then he went to the shower, closed the door, and picked at his unruly red spikes. He didn't think they were all _that_ bad.

* * *

_"It's pretty boring over here without you to pester. How're _your_ classes, knucklehead?"_

Axel kicked a rock along the ground on the way to class, book bag over one shoulder and phone on the next. Larxene was on the line. "I miss you, too, my lil' muffincake," he drawled. He heard her sharp chortle. "They're all right. I'm still getting used to this place."

_"Meet any interesting kids yet?"_

Someone could be fifty-five, and Larxene would still call them a kid. It was a habit he was picking up from her. "A few," he said. "My counselor for the Drama department is Mr. Lexaeus. He's doing a play I think I'll try out fo—"

"_RUN_, run away!"

"Wha—" Axel blinked and saw a brown-haired boy trying to desperately shove his way past people. Two or three he almost succeeded in knocking over, but he seemed so panicked that he didn't look back. A small string of shouts from someone rang through the air.

He ran into Axel like a semi-truck. Axel stumbled, arms flailing, but maintained balance. The phone and his backpack were dropped upon collision; Larxene's distant _"what the hell?"_ was soon forgotten.

"Hide me!" the strange boy cried, twisting behind Axel and using him as a shield. "Don't let him see me!"

Axel was quite annoyed. He did not like having his cell phone possibly damaged. "What are you—"

Then he saw the tall blond man rampaging through the crowd, eyes set and determined. In all likelihood, that was the guy the kid behind him was trying to hide from. Axel couldn't really blame him. While he had simply tried to slip by people, this guy was purposely pushing everyone out of his way.

He felt a sudden jerk on the back of his hoodie. Choking, he was pulled off the sidewalk and next to a tree. He could practically feel the trembling mass of boy between him and the plant. Upon looking at the blond man again, Axel wiped the startled look off his face and appeared casual.

Blondie stopped near them, his angry eyes scanning the area. Growling, he continued on.

The brown-haired boy didn't come out until his pursuer was long gone. He collapsed to the grass, breathing heavily and holding something to his chest. Axel went to his poor, abused possessions, slinging his pack back over his shoulder and picking up his phone. It appeared undamaged, besides a few new scratches.

"Sorry, Larxene, something came up," he explained and flipped it shut, just as she was about to comment on something about wringing his scrawny neck. Turning to the stranger, he raised an eyebrow. "So, uh, mind letting me in on who you are?"

The other took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. It was styled in some blast-from-the-past mohawk. He also wore a t-shirt with an image that Axel recognized as _The Nobodies_, a popular rock band. "Demyx," he said. "Oh, man, that was a close one. Thank you so, so much."

"Name's Axel. Get it memorized." He held out his hand. Demyx took it and was hauled to his feet. "What did you do to piss that guy off so much?"

Demyx brushed off his jeans with one hand. He looked up and grinned impishly. It would've been cute, if it hadn't seemed so mischievous. "Oh, Seifer? I just stole a CD he wouldn't let me borrow."

Axel wondered if he had helped the wrong person. The thing Demyx was clutching so tightly was indeed a CD. "Uh-huh."

"Hey, don't look at me like that!" Demyx whined. "Seifer and I are friends! He'll get it over when I give it back to him."

"Friends," Axel said, a grin spreading. The situation was finally sinking in. It was actually pretty funny, once he thought about it. "You two appear to be _very_ close."

Demyx winked. "Like brothers."

Axel began to open his mouth to reply, but remembered that he had a class he was going to be late for. "Oh, _man_." He sighed, waved goodbye, and began to briskly walk away.

Demyx jogged to catch up. "Where are you going?"

"English department," Axel explained, turning up his pace. "Room 126."

"Why don't you take a shuttle shortcut? It's a lot easier than walking!"

Axel paused abruptly and looked down at the smiling face. Demyx looked like a freshman. "Shuttle?" He had wondered what those miniature bus things were for. "Shortcut?"

"You're new here, huh? C'mon, I'll show you." Demyx began to pull on his sleeve. "It'll repay the favor of saving me."

Axel reluctantly let himself be tugged along. "Aren't you just a fresh—"

"_I_ attended the campus orientation."

Oh, yeah. That thing. "Well aren't _you_ special."

It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

* * *

"Riku? Riku, what do I do here?"

Riku looked up from his History text to see Sora frustrated at a Calculus problem. Sora had picked him up from the campus to hang out at his house. He explained he felt bad for not having much time for his best friend, but they could still do homework together like they used to, right?

"Sora," Riku began, amused, "you know I'm not very good at math."

Sora chewed on the end of his pencil. He was lying on his stomach, papers spread out before him on the carpet, while Riku sat with his back against Sora's bedside. "That's not _true_, Riku. You always helped me in high school, remember?"

"In high school," Riku repeated, flipping a page. "But Calculus? I'm surprised your dumb brain is able to hook onto that stuff."

Sora frowned deeply, his eyebrows scrunching together. Riku couldn't help but chuckle.

Same ol' Sora.

"Guess I'll ask Kairi about it tomorrow."

Suddenly it wasn't so funny.

"Let me look at it," Riku said, putting down his work and crawling over. "Maybe I can figure it out."

Sora's grin came back. The heavy weight on Riku's chest lifted. The book was scooted over, and Riku tried to translate the abundance of symbols and numbers into something coherent. He understood basic Algebra well enough, but everything on that page flew right over his head.

It hurt that he couldn't help Sora like he used to.

"I don't know," he admitted softly, sitting back.

Sora was looking at him sadly. Disappointment was clear across his face.

That hurt so, so bad.

"It's okay, Riku. I'll get it."

The History text was picked up again. Riku settled back into his place and tried to focus on the words about government and war.

"And if not, I'm sure Kairi can."

"Yeah," he murmured. "Kairi can."

* * *

Several days into their friendship, Demyx sent Axel a text message telling him to meet in the cafeteria for dinner. Upon gathering, he revealed that he was going to give the CD back to Seifer and wanted the extra protection.

Axel snorted as they went through the line to the soda fountain. "What do you think _I_ can do to a guy that buff?"

Demyx smirked, filling up his Coke. "You make a good shield."

Axel's mouth gaped open. "You brought me here so your friend could _beat_ on me!"

Demyx all but skipped away, soda and hotdog in hand. His demented laughter was heard even above the other people.

Axel found him again sitting across the blond guy from the other day. Upon seeing him closer, Seifer was rather handsome. His form nearly dwarfed Demyx's, one strong arm resting along the back of the booth. He sat slouched, legs open, with a devil-may-care smirk. His jade green eyes rested on Axel as the redhead approached. Axel was forced to sit next to the freshman, since Seifer was taking up one entire side.

"So this is Axel, eh?" Seifer said. "I think I remember you."

Axel grinned from around his sandwich. He couldn't help but notice Seifer's smooth voice. "I am hard to forget."

"Hah!" Seifer crowed. "With a face _that_ ugly—"

It was almost enough to make Axel stand up. Instead, he just gave a lecherous sneer and praised himself for his self-control. "Jealous much?"

Seifer blinked for a moment, startled that he hadn't gotten a rise out of the newcomer. Or maybe he knew Axel was hitting on him. Whatever the case, he threw back his head and cackled. "Oh, yeah. I'm real jealous. I want you _all_ night long."

"You guys, that's gross!" They looked over to see Demyx with a horrified expression, his half-eaten hotdog held between two hands. "I _never_ want to picture Seifer like that!"

"You little snot—"

"Didn't you have a reason for this get-together, Demyx?" Axel said quickly. Seifer was beginning to fume. Apparently his pride had taken a blow. He wondered how these two could have _ever_ become friends.

"Ooooh, yeah," Demyx said thoughtfully. He reached into his cargo pants and brought the CD out, handing it to Seifer.

Seifer smirked and took it. "About damned time."

"Sooo… you're not going to hit me?"

Seifer responded by smacking Demyx over the head.

"Ooowwww! Axel, you were supposed to protect me!"

Too bad Axel was currently laughing with Seifer.

Demyx rubbed the sore spot. "You guys are mean."

"Thank you," Seifer said, smirking again. Pushing aside his plate, he leaned back with his hands behind his head.

Demyx sulked and bit into his hotdog. Axel wondered again.

"So, how did _you_ two end up as friends?"

Demyx immediately piped up and wolfed down the rest of his food. "We're in the same band!" He honestly did look like a little punk.

"Band?" Axel echoed, interest rising. Maybe there'd finally be something to do besides talk to his long-distance friends.

"It's called The Organization," Seifer supplied. "I'm the lead singer." _Because I'm the best_ went unspoken.

"Electric guitar!" Demyx said, strumming his fingers in the air and making noises. "There's also Zexion, Luxord, and my little sister Yuffie."

Axel gulped down the rest of his soda. "That's cool. Have you guys done anything yet?"

Demyx sulked again. "No. We just practice on Fridays at my house. Everyone usually ends up spending the night, though."

A bright, wicked idea dawned in Demyx's brain. He turned to Axel slowly, and for a moment, Axel knew true fear.

"You should come with us this Friday! We could get some publicity going!"

Seifer frowned. "Does he have to?"

Axel frowned right back. "What, I'm not welcome?"

Demyx was practically begging, hands clasped in front and pleading eyes staring. "Aw, come on, Seif, please?"

"God damn it," Seifer muttered and crossed his arms. He looked away. "Fine."

"Yes!" Demyx cheered, standing up and pumping his arms. He didn't mind the weird looks he was beginning to get. "Seifer will drive us to my house. I'll get you in your dorm this Friday at seven o' clock sharp."

Axel didn't really have the chance to decline.

Well, he guessed it _could_ prove fun.

* * *

It was a Friday night in mid-October. Riku usually was with friends on Friday nights, with Leon and Cloud, or maybe Sora, or even Naminé. People were a good distraction. They made him smile and not think about things that shouldn't bother him in the first place.

The blank _Microsoft Word_ document was taunting him. He couldn't figure out how to begin his English Composition essay.

Axel was on his side of the room, headphones plugged in and talking to his online friends. Riku thought about doing the same, but he really did need to get this paper done. Distractions would not do.

The _tap-tap-tap_ of Axel's keyboard was distracting enough.

Riku knew he shouldn't be letting that get to him. Or how dull and closed-in the walls appeared. Everything seemed to be blown out of proportion tonight, and he was having trouble thinking.

He raised his hands to begin typing, but a knock on the door stopped him. Looking to Axel, he saw the redhead completely oblivious, so he got up to answer it himself.

The door was opened, and a boy he never saw before was suddenly in his face.

"Hey, A—! Whoa, you're not Axel."

Axel had heard the commotion over his music and was waving from his chair. "Demyx! I'll be ready in just a second."

Demyx invited himself in. "So, who's your roommate?" he asked, looking back at the silver-haired boy.

"That's just Riku," Axel said, shutting down and closing his laptop. He stood up to grab his hoodie.

Riku narrowed his eyes. "I _am_ here, you know."

"Riku, huh?" Demyx stood on his toes to get a closer look at Riku's face, which was partially covered by his long bangs. "Hey, you wanna come with us? We're going to my house."

Axel paused, his hoodie halfway over his head. His voice came muffled. "I don't think he—"

"I'll go." Riku had said that a little more quickly than he would've like.

He saw the completely shocked look on Axel's face as the hoodie was tugged down the rest of the way.

"That's great! More publicity!" Demyx said, fists held excitedly by his sides. "I'll wait outside. Hurry and get ready! I bet Seifer's getting impatient."

The door was slammed shut and Demyx was gone before Riku could ask questions.

Axel was still staring at him.

Riku couldn't meet his eyes. "What?"

Axel shook his head. Then, he was back to his normal sneering self. "You open up to the kid and not me? Am I not cute enough or something?"

Riku was putting on his jacket over his sleeveless, black zippered shirt. "Enough?" he retorted. "You're hardly cute at all."

Okay, there was the Riku Axel had known the past month. Snarky little withdrawn bastard.

Axel went out the door. "I'm going. See you out there."

And Riku was left alone. He closed out his blank document and turned his computer off. The room was dark and quiet.

He didn't want to be left alone on a Friday night.

He quickly followed Axel out the door.

* * *

After Seifer's displeasure at the newest addition, which was quelled by Demyx's whines, they were on the move. Demyx sat in front, which left Riku and Axel in the back. The three friends talked, Demyx describing their band and how they got together, Seifer interrupting from time to time to make a rude or cocky comment. Apparently they were all big fans of _The Nobodies _and aspired to be like them. Axel listened and asked questions and said his thoughts.

Riku didn't speak. He just looked out the window as the scenery rolled by. Axel hadn't expected him to do much else.

Soon enough they reached Demyx's home, a modest white house with a line of bushes at the front porch. A middle-aged woman was already running to them by the time they got out of the car.

"Demyx, my baby, my sweetheart, my love!" She enveloped him in a crushing hug. "How I have _missed_ you!"

Demyx was suffocating. "Moooom… it's only been a week. Like all the other times!"

"Nonsense! Accept your mother's love."

A girl with short, dark brown hair poked her head out the door. Axel highly suspected this was Yuffie. She seemed young enough to still be in high school. "About time you guys got here! Everyone's already downstairs. Oh, Mom, let Demyx go. He's turning blue!"

She released the poor boy, who staggered away gasping dramatically. Her sights were then set on Axel and Riku. "Look, new faces! Who are these strapping young lads?"

Seifer butted in, explaining their presence, as Demyx's mother ushered everyone inside the warm house.

Their father was just as bad. Axel suddenly understood why Demyx was the way he was. He'd totally be making momma's boy jokes after this.

Riku, meanwhile, was almost in awe. Looking around the house, he saw it decorated kindly, with so many pictures framed on walls, and the smell of good cooking from the kitchen, Demyx's parents' jovial welcomes, Yuffie's light teasing of her brother…

It was everything that made a _home_.

"To the basement!" Yuffie shouted, sweeping her thin arms out. Her mother made sure she didn't forget the cookies she had worked so hard to bake.

"You boys play nice with my little girl," her father boomed from the living room. "No funny business!"

"Daaaaaad!" Her voice disappeared down the stairwell.

They all followed her down. Riku and Axel were met with a full arrangement of instruments, an unplugged stereo system (they had been ordered not to be _too_ loud), several worn chairs and couches, and two people watching as they stepped onto the concrete floor.

Demyx first jumped to the young man with pale purple hair. "This is Zexion. He's the silent one of the group, but he can be a real asshole, so don't let your guard down."

Zexion rolled his eyes. His hair was thick and wild, covering half his face. "Yeah. I'm real vicious."

"And I'm Luxord!" The other man, with close-cut blond hair and a goatee, shoved his hand out in greeting. He had a distinct British accent. "The eldest. I have to look after these guys."

The others had a bit of protest to that.

Axel shook his hand and smiled back, introducing himself. Riku did the same, but with a nod instead of a smile.

"Enough of that!" proclaimed Yuffie, holding the cookie platter high in the air. Her short green tank top rode up to reveal her stomach. "It's _snack time_!"

With Demyx's cry of "food!" they gathered around, sitting on the floor. The plate was set in the center, and Axel began to hungrily reach for it (they smelled _good_) but Yuffie smacked his hand.

"Okay," she started, "on the count of three. One…"

Everyone but Riku and Zexion leaned forward.

"Two…"

Their hands stretched out.

"Three!"

The poor cookies never stood a chance.

* * *

With their appetites satisfied (Luxord had snatched a cookie for Zexion, because he _knew_ that Zexion wanted one; Riku had politely declined any offers), the practice began. Yuffie sat at the drums, tapping the cymbals softly. Demyx, Luxord, and Seifer had slung guitars on, and Zexion was setting up his keyboard. Axel and Riku sat on a couch to the side. Axel asked questions about what this did, or what that was for, while Riku calmly, wordlessly watched.

Everyone seemed so… content.

"Okay, you morons!" Seifer spread out his arms to order silence. He was immediately obeyed. The unspoken leader. "Let's try out the one we were working on last Friday for a warm-up. The one without lyrics."

Demyx strummed loudly on his guitar. Riku was thankful they hadn't hooked up the stereos. "Baaaaadum dum badum! A-one, a-two…" Hands were poised over drum sets, guitar strings, and keys. "A-one, two, three, four!"

Right then, the room broke out into motion and sound.

Their hands danced along their instruments like lovers. They knew their instruments so intimately that they could close their eyes. The music was upbeat and lifting. It was so full of _life_ and all contained therein, it was no wonder why they were smiling. The steady beat of the drum, the lilting chords of the keyboard, and the harmonizing of the three guitars…

This was _The Organization_. They played because they loved to play, and it showed through clearly.

And when the beat got faster, some bobbed their heads, while others tapped their feet. But they were all smiling, even Zexion.

This was their _life_.

Axel was already tapping his foot and bobbing his head. He was grinning so widely that it felt like his face would crack. Their excitement was seeping into him as he looked at each of their expressions. He couldn't help it. His entire body was humming.

He _had_ to get up and dance.

Riku blinked out of his stupor when Axel stood up and began swinging, hands near his head and giving out a happy whoop. Several hollers of encouragement came from the band.

Everyone surrounding Riku was so full of enthusiasm, bliss, energy and movement that it was contagious. He had never seen people so… unconditionally happy just doing what they did.

He wished he could be like that, too.

Riku looked up at Axel. Axel looked down at Riku.

And Riku smiled.

For the first time, Axel noticed the color of Riku's eyes.

A brilliant, bold aqua.

* * *

On the ride home, the car was filled with ecstatic rambling. Axel was saying how awesome and fun it had been, Seifer was basking in the praise, and Demyx was thanking him endlessly, saying that _yeah_, they would totally make it to the top. They just had to stick together.

Riku gave his compliments. He also softly mentioned that Axel had looked like a dork while dancing.

Axel kept glancing at Riku. This was different from what he had been experiencing in the dorm. This Riku was more open, if only a little.

Maybe he wasn't so bad, after all.

* * *

After that night, things seemed to go back to normal. The days passed like usual: the same thing whenever they woke up, the same routine of exchanging sarcastic banter—there _was_ one difference, though. The banter occurred more often.

The end of October came. It was Halloween.

Axel remembered the time he had dressed up as a knight in shining (plastic) armor. Roxas had been there as a swamp monster, covered in green make-up and a bodysuit of fake kelp. Many a time Axel's lance had poked Roxas in the butt.

They had been fourteen. That was the last time Axel had gone trick-or-treating. Roxas said they were grown out of it. Back then they had only been friends.

He sort of missed those times.

Okay, so he was twenty-years-old now, and it'd be really weird to see a full-grown man prancing down the streets in some costume asking for candy. He compromised by going to the store and buying several bags of sweets to bring back to his dorm.

Riku was, of course, working on some homework at his desk. The kid was always doing something.

Axel sat on his bed, the top bunker, and stared at assorted candy bags.

He was going to make himself sick.

And it was going to be awesome.

While Riku continued reading some textbook, candy wrappers began to slowly drift to the floor, one-by-one. Axel munched loudly, trying to get his roommate's attention. Eating candy was great and all, but getting sick with someone else was even better.

No such luck. Axel's green eyes bore a hole into Riku's head. He _knew_ this kid wasn't half-bad. He wanted to see more of the Riku from that night at Demyx's.

A _Reese's Pieces_ quickly found its mark, hitting square on Riku's ear. The younger boy exclaimed and turned, standing up and wondering what had befallen him.

A grinning Axel from above was his answer. "Mind handing that back to me? I dropped it."

Riku looked down at the orange-wrapped chocolate cup. "You threw that, you bastard."

"Hey, let's not jump to conclusions."

Aqua eyes narrowed from behind thick bangs. "I need to get this assignment done."

"Shit, man," Axel said, chucking a _Butterfinger_ down. "It's Halloween. Come eat candy with me."

Riku dodged it and began to go back to work. "Not now."

Axel sighed. Normally this was the point where he'd shrug and give up. But it was a _holiday_…

This time, he used the single candy apple he had picked up.

Riku's shoulder was not appreciative.

"What was that for?" Riku added in a colorful word or two and held his throbbing arm. He stalked over to the bed.

Axel was quick to crawl out of Riku's reach. "I won't stop until you sit and eat some damned candy with me. You need to relax, man."

"How can I relax when you're pelting food at me?"

"Easy. Come up here."

Riku was fighting a losing battle. "Fine. But just a couple of pieces."

"Good boy."

Frowning, Riku climbed up the ladder and sat Indian-style on the opposite end of the bed. The candy bags were between them.

"Eat these. They're good," Axel said, pushing some _Tootsie Rolls_ across the sheets.

Riku went for the _Hershey's Kisses_ instead. The silver wrapping was peeled off and the little chocolate was popped into his mouth. "Where did you get all this?"

"The store. My parents send me some cash every month," Axel explained. He was devouring a _Tootsie Roll_ and almost choked on it.

Riku wasn't worried. "Oh. My Dad does that for me, too."

"Yeah, it's pretty cool." The redhead was examining a strangely deformed _Kiss_. It looked like a steamboat.

The wrappers were beginning to cover the space between them quicker than Riku had thought. It had been so long since he just gorged on candy. He could barely remember the last time he went trick-o-treating.

"Ahh," Axel breathed out, holding one brown candy bar on high. "The wondrous _Snicker Bar_. One of my friends back home loved these. My old boyfriend Roxas liked them, too."

That got Riku's attention. "Boyfriend?"

The miniature _Snicker Bar_ was consumed in one bite. Axel had to chew thoroughly before answering. "Yeah. You don't have a problem with that, do you?"

Riku wondered how Axel could say that so casually. He picked off the wrapper to another _Reese's_. "No. I'm gay, too."

"Oh." Axel had already had a feeling. "That's cool."

And that was that. It really was no big deal.

So, they talked and ate candy until they got sick. Axel spoke more of his home and friends, like how Hayner hated it when Olette and he scoped out guys, how Pence knew all the fun spots in town, and even the crazy teacher from the seventh grade that had been hell-bent on making his life miserable.

Axel was a good storyteller. He _enjoyed_ telling stories, especially funny ones, and his hands and face and voice were so animated that it was hard not to listen. It was hard not to smile, if only a little. Riku suddenly found himself having a good time.

Axel asked about Riku's home. He wasn't as good as telling stories as Axel was, but Axel listened anyway. Riku talked about Wakka, Selphie, and Tidus from school. When encouraged, he told him how he had met Sora in junior high. But beyond that, he said his life wasn't very exciting, and didn't merit mentioning.

Axel said that was stupid. Life was as exciting as you made it.

Afterward, they ended up on the floor.

"Does this mean we're friends? You know, staying up late and making ourselves want to throw up and all."

Riku turned his head to look at Axel, both holding their abused stomachs. He thought for a moment before responding. "I don't see why not."

Axel's triumphant grin was wide. "Awesome."

**-October, end**


	3. November

**Author's Notes:** Mmm… I had a lot of trouble with this month. I was struggling with the transition that Riku and Axel are going through, and making them stay in-character at the same time.

November, in which we introduce a snarky graduate, interrupt movies, and talk turkey about family (but not really).

Thanks so much for all the reviews! I replied to the signed ones. To people wanting omgromancesquee, I'm afraid it's going to be a bit… ahahah. I'm a loser. Also, Axel and Riku are stubborn. Blame them?

Onward!

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter three- November**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

On each dorm floor was a communal kitchen, equipped with the appliances and culinary utensils needed. The food placed in it was left up to the residents; some chose to cook for themselves, some opted for the cheap cafeteria meal plan, and some used the community fridge simply for takeout leftovers.

The community fridge was something left unguarded. There was no lock, no restraint, no protection for the food placed inside. For those with less-than-good intentions, it was easy pickings.

Or for Axel, when his monthly check hadn't come yet, the previous already blown to the wind.

The fridge's air was cold. Axel stood in front of it, in the shroud of night, desperate and hungry. He supposed his morals could be better, but his stomach had been growling and keeping him awake. He wondered if he should manage his money a bit better.

That candy had been so worth it.

There was a _Domino's _pizza box sitting on the lower shelf. A sticky note on the top read: "**Do Not Touch**!"

He took part of the pizza inside, but left the box alone.

* * *

Demyx was showing Axel printed pictures of various _Nobodies_ members. They both had most of Wednesday off, so Axel had driven them to Demyx's house, where the mother of all mothers had prepared lunch in the form of assorted sandwiches and peanut butter crackers.

Yuffie and Luxord were there, too. The high school girl was displaying some new toy she had snatched up; it was a plastic bottle labeled _Splish Splat!_ by Nickelodeon. Inside was a strange purple substance that had yet to be classified.

All four sat at the kitchen table. They could hear Demyx's mother scampering in the background with the dirty dishes.

"This is from their first concert overseas," Demyx explained, pulling out another black-and-white print from his Folder of _Nobodies_ Holiness. "Xigbar accidentally left his prized drumsticks in the jet plane, so they had to make a special trip to get them. He can't perform with any other pair. Isn't that cool?"

Axel peered at the photo. A tough, burly man sporting a large scar was depicted grinning and tapping some drumsticks against a jet plane's wheel. Axel tried to remain interested, but it was hard. He'd never been confronted with so much useless trivia in his life.

"Oh, _God_!" He heard Luxord's accent as the mysterious purple bottle was poured out. "Yuffie, that stuff is bloody sick!"

"I know! Check this out—I can make it ooze through my fingers."

"I have stuff with the same consistency as that coming out of my _nose_."

Yuffie flung it from hand to hand. It dripped between her fingers in long tendrils and pooled on the table. Luxord made a gagging noise.

Demyx didn't seem to be paying them attention. Apparently it was fairly normal. "And this is when Saïx came down with the flu. They had to hold off two whole nights of performances because he got it so bad!"

"Fascinating. Truly fascinating," Axel drawled as he was handed the photo of an extremely perturbed blue-haired man. He was actually more intrigued by Yuffie's toy.

Ah, well. He had gotten free food, and the little punk was growing on him. Sort of like a weed.

Demyx didn't seem deterred. "And _this _is when…"

"Yuffie, ew! No! Get that crap away from me!"

"You _know_ you wanna toouuch it!"

Demyx's mother shouted over her shoulder and the running faucet. "So who wants seconds? Anyone? They're yummy!"

"Mooooom," Demyx whined. "We're busy!"

She waved a soapy knife threateningly. "You can _never_ have enough peanut butter, young man."

"I think we're fine, thanks," Axel said, taking this opportunity to stand up. "We actually better be heading back. My audition is coming up."

Yuffie's attention shifted to him. The ooze dribbled down her arms. Luxord stared in half-horror, half-fascination. "Oooo, you gonna be in a movie?"

"College play," he corrected. Demyx was pouting and gathering his folder together. "It's a rewrite of _A Christmas Carol_. They made it contemporary… or something."

"So you're an actor!" Demyx chirped. The folder was stuck under his arm. "Drama major?"

"Performing Arts, but I guess that's just the fancy name for it, huh?"

They said their goodbyes and Demyx received a crushing hug from his mother. For a brief moment, it made Axel miss his parents, but the sentiment vanished as they went out the door.

He made momma's boy jokes all the way home.

* * *

The movie was some action flick they had all been able to agree on. The action was what attracted Leon, and the young male hero was what attracted Cloud and Riku. There were a lot of special effects, people doing cool martial art moves, and things going _kaboom_ in a series of flashing lights that filled the dark theatre.

They sat near the back so not to bother the serious viewers with their idle conversation. Or rather, Cloud's idle conversation about the young male hero's curiously tight leather pants. Occasionally Leon admired some martial art scene, but mostly to himself—Cloud and Riku knew what parts he liked though, because he'd smirk a little and his eyes would be glued to the gigantic screen. Riku, on the other hand, simply looked at the movie as a way to pass time with his friends.

The guy _was_ nice-looking, though.

He felt a strange sensation from his theatre seat. Fidgeting, Riku reached into his back pocket.

"Your butt is vibrating." Only Cloud could say that with a completely straight face.

"It's my phone," Riku explained quietly. The tiny glow illuminated his pale face. A little envelope icon was on the cell's front.

_1 unread message_

A few buttons later, and he found out the source of the message to be his roommate. They had exchanged numbers at the beginning of the year, in case of emergency.

While the hero narrowly adverted some random disaster with his mad skills, Riku looked upon the text message:

_Call me asap its rly important_

Well, they _had_ exchanged numbers in case of emergency…

"I'll be right back," he whispered, standing up and shuffling out. Cloud and Leon let him pass with a nod and wave.

Just a quick call to see what was wrong would do. Maybe it really was something important. The movie could wait.

Once outside, he dialed the number from his contacts and leaned against the wall. He watched people buy popcorn and soda from the concession stand while the cell rang twice.

There was a garbled noise, like the phone on the other end had been flipped open hurriedly. _"S'up."_

"Axel?" Riku kept his voice low, so not to disturb anyone walking by. "What's wrong?"

_"Huh? Uh… well, there is sorta this crick in my neck…"_

Riku sighed. "You sent me a text message."

_"_Oh_, that. Yeah. Listen, I have _awesome_ news."_

"Good news?" Riku murmured, averting his eyes from the concession stand to his feet. "That's what's so important?"

There was a shifting sound. _"Good news is _always_ important. Especially mine. I sent everyone in my cell that message."_

The ceiling was suddenly very intriguing. "I was in a movie. I thought something was actually wrong."

_"I'm really touched you were so worried."_

Riku snorted lightly. "Aren't you going to tell me your news?"

_"Okay, okay, get this. I tried out for a part in our college play—the one that's like a modern Scrooge thing—and…"_

Axel went on to describe the in-progress stage, the funny people he ran across, and how the audition actually went. His voice wasn't particularly excited, but the emphasis he put on certain words was enough. Riku could imagine the illustrating hand gestures in his head. Once or twice Axel had to excuse himself for another call that came in, all of which he asked to ring him later when he'd tell the story to them, too.

It was a little like when Sora got enthusiastic about something. Except the big difference was that Axel wasn't a chatterbox. His words were frank and evenly said.

_"… got the part of the Ghost of Christmas Past. It's not very big, but I get to dress up like a hippie."_

The tale ended sooner than Riku expected. He had been quietly studying the ceiling throughout Axel's escapade.

"Congratulations. That's great," he finally said.

_"Yeah, it is."_

He didn't know what to say after that, so he kept silent.

_"So, uh, I better get back to the people who called earlier. They're waiting."_

Riku stood up straight. "All right. I'll see you later at the dorm."

He almost hung up, but Axel spoke first: _"Hey, hold on."_

Riku attempted to brush his long bangs to the side. He wondered what time it was. "What is it?"

_"When are you gonna get back?"_

The question surprised him. Axel had crossed the boundary of tolerated acquaintance to pleasant companion, but the idea that he cared when Riku returned seemed odd.

"… soon."

_"All right, that's cool. See you."_

"Bye."

The phone was flipped shut.

* * *

Midterms were fast approaching. It was a dreaded time for many a student: some held group studies, some crammed, some procrastinated, and some went to their unfortunate graduate friends for assistance.

Riku's unfortunate graduate friend was Ansem, a scholarly man aiming for his master's degree in some field of science Riku couldn't pronounce.

Riku, as intelligent as he was, was also overly ambitious in his classes. This caused some strain in the math and science department, and while he could figure it out well enough on his own, it was more efficient to have someone nearby who could calculate a Chemistry problem in the blink of an eye.

Riku had met Ansem while the elder had been working as a lab assistant at the college. The stoic man had pointedly given him instructions, Riku later had to unwillingly ask for help, and after a few sessions of bubbly chemicals, they grew acquainted. Ansem was a good help, albeit an all-knowing, arrogant, way-too-honest conversationalist.

Said conversationalist had his nose stuck in a book while at his desk, a small lamp as his only light. Riku watched him for a moment before clearing his throat.

Ansem's orange eyes flickered up. His small reading glasses were perched on the end of his brown-skinned nose. "Yes?"

Riku sat on Ansem's bed. He nodded down at the threatening Biology book.

Ansem sighed, and stood up to lecture.

Riku wasn't really sure why Ansem wordlessly accepted him into his apartment whenever he needed the assistance. He always acted like it was an irritation, or a bother, but he did his duty nevertheless.

Riku considered him as an older brother. Whether the man liked it or not, not only did Riku come to him for educational reasons, but also for advice. Ansem looked at things in such a factual, aloof manner that his wisdom, on some level, made sense entirely. Riku could tell him things he couldn't tell any of his other friends, even Naminé, but she usually figured his secrets out on her own.

The Biology dilemma was subsided. Riku took a break to lie on the bed and think while Ansem went back to his book.

"I haven't seen Sora for a couple of weeks," he said quietly, hands behind his head.

Ansem kept reading. "Oh?"

Riku hadn't expected any more of a reply. "Yeah. Between midterms, his parents, and Kairi…" He trailed off.

"Mmhmm."

"… I wonder if he forgets about me sometimes."

The soft admission made Ansem's eyes glance over his reading glass. "There's a saying you children use in certain cases… Now, what was it again?" He appeared to be in deep thought, stroking his chin. "Ah, yes. 'Life's a bitch, and then you die.'"

The lack of sympathy wasn't a surprise. It was part of the reason that made Ansem so easy to talk to. His dark, subtle humor was a perfect distraction.

Riku chuckled. "Words of wisdom from Ansem."

"Hmm."

* * *

While midterms came and went, Figure Drawing class became more and more interesting. Their first few models had been female—the smooth curves and lean figures were simpler to draw than the sharp angles and formed muscles of a man. Then one day, their professor finally announced they'd begin on the male form.

Riku and Naminé sat together on their wooden horses as usual, the newsprint paper set up and ready for quick sketches. While they waited for the model, Naminé doodled.

"I made another," she said lightly, turning the booklet. It showed a rough, penciled sketch of Riku sitting by a window. She didn't forget to make sure he was looking out.

His eyes skimmed over it. A one-sided smile appeared. "You like drawing me a lot."

She nodded pleasantly and set the booklet on her lap. Her eyes were strangely bright as she flipped through her sketchpad. "You're nice to draw."

Riku ran a hand through his layered hair and looked away. Naminé watched. He could feel her eyes looking right into him.

The male model finally entered, stood in the room's center, and removed his robe.

Naminé gave a small squeak of surprise as her hand covered her mouth, and Riku had to stop himself from staring.

He hadn't really told her he was gay yet. He hoped it was obvious enough.

* * *

It was near the end of November. The air was chilly, the trees were bare, and Axel couldn't sleep. Thanksgiving break was coming soon, and he couldn't help but think of driving back home. He already missed his family and old friends. Sadly enough, he didn't think he could. It was just too far away. He still remembered Hayner's complaints about the distance after he had dropped Axel off.

Riku was a quiet sleeper. He neither snored nor moved.

Axel was thankful for their companionship. It made living together so much easier. They weren't buddy-buddy, no, but they could have a conversation and be interested in what the other had to say, even if it happened to be sarcastic.

At night, when they were trying to sleep, was usually the time they held these conversations. At other times they were with their own friends, in class, or studying. Except for a few phone calls, they didn't see each other much outside the dorm.

"Hey," Axel called to the dark, "you awake?"

He heard the slight rustling of sheets underneath him. "… Yeah."

"You live pretty close, right? Gonna go see your folks for Thanksgiving?"

There was a long pause. "Probably not. Dad's busy."

"Mom?"

"I haven't seen her for a long time."

"Oh."

Axel drummed his fingers on his bare stomach and thought of something to say. He didn't bother to consider if Riku wanted to sleep or not. "Your dad some type of busybody?"

A deep sigh. "He's in business, yeah."

"He know you're gay?"

"Don't you wake up early tomorrow?"

That sounded a little touchy. Axel backed off. "Can't sleep. Got all this energy." He looked to the window; pale moonlight was shining in. "My parents know. My mom thought it was great that I finally figured out my sexuality. Dad said he always knew I was a little fruit."

Riku laughed quietly. It made Axel feel better. "That sounds kind of harsh."

Axel grinned to himself. "Eh, I know he loves me."

The quiet stretched out. Axel entertained himself by watching the wind blow fallen leaves in circles outside.

"… My dad thinks it's just a phase."

Sharing your side first makes it easier for the other to share his, too.

"That type, huh?" Axel said. "They get over it after a while."

More rustling. Axel pictured Riku rolling onto his side. "I guess so."

Axel spread his arms up, his knuckles grazing the ceiling. "What about a boyfriend? Anyone special to visit?"

"I don't have one." Riku's voice sounded sad. It was hard to tell, though. Maybe he was just tired.

Axel was almost surprised. "Gee, someone with as huge of a personality as yours without a boyfriend? I'm shocked."

He had meant it as a joke, but Riku heard an insult instead. "You're one to talk."

"Hey," Axel started, "Roxas and I never _really_ called it off. Just after a few months of not speaking, you begin to think it's over."

"He was probably too nice to say it to your face."

The redhead frowned. That certainly was an unpleasant idea.

Axel let the subject drop. Neither of them said more, so he closed his eyes to try and sleep, but failed miserably. It was one of those nights that his mind refused to shut off. After flopping around a bit more, he gave up.

Riku's soft voice came to him: "Stop moving. You're making a lot of noise."

Axel grinned deviously as he leaned over his bedside. "I _have_ to move. I'm on top."

While upside down, he saw Riku's face half-buried into his pillow, arms wrapped around it tightly and lying on his stomach. One aqua eye peered through silver bangs; Axel barely caught the displeased glare. The innuendo had not been lost.

"Hey, chill out," he advised. Axel's spikes stayed the same even while hanging over the edge. "I was just joking."

Riku mumbled something into his pillow.

Axel pursed his lips. He disappeared back up, only for his legs to come swinging down. He soon landed on the floor with a thud.

Riku raised his head, hair slightly out of place on one side. "What are you doing?"

Axel sat with his back against Riku's bed, legs spread out wide and elbows resting on bent knees. His body twisted a little to look up at his roommate. The moonlight made Riku's hair gleam. "What are you thankful for?" he asked suddenly. "And not the usual stuff either."

Riku's eyes widened in surprise. "Wha—"

"What are you thankful for?" he asked again, punctuating each word. "It's almost Thanksgiving. Every Thanksgiving dinner, my folks would ask what I'm thankful for. But you can't say stuff like family and friends, because everyone knows everyone else is thankful for _that_."

Axel could remember his mom's delicious pie, and how his dad would slowly puff on a cigar till his mother would scold that it was bad for his health.

He was looking forward to winter break and seeing them again. He had had a routine in his life, for every day of every year, and then he had moved far away and the routine was broken. Everything had changed in one day, and while he _was _growing accustomed to the new place and people, it would be easy to slip back home.

"I, uh," Riku stammered, caught off-guard. "I don't know."

Axel gestured one arm out. "Okay, then I'll tell you what _I'm_ thankful for." He thought for a moment, eyebrows furrowed. "I'm thankful for… soda fountains."

"Soda fountains?" Riku questioned.

Axel turned to him again. "Yeah, yanno, like the ones in the cafeteria? I can mix all types of sodas together and make the best suicide drink ever." Riku looked disgusted. "Hey, it tastes really good. Don't mock the suicide."

"I think there's a reason they call it a suicide."

"You'll try it someday," Axel said, grinning. "And you'll like it. Just add in a lot of Coke, a good amount of Sprite, some root beer, a tad of fruit punch if it's there, and voila."

"Ugh…"

Axel rolled his green eyes. "Okay, fine. What about milk? Cold milk on a hot summer day. I'm thankful for that."

Riku sat up and let his legs hang over the bedside. They brushed against Axel's shoulder. "I think ice cream would work better."

"But they're basically the same thing."

"One is frozen."

Axel crossed his arms. "Have it your way. You _have_ to be thankful for sprinklers, though."

"On the lawn? They're for the grass."

"_And_ for running through."

Riku gave a short, curt chuckle. "You're weird."

"There's gotta be _something _you can think of," Axel said, moving his hands behind his head and leaning back. "The snooze button? I love my snooze button."

"I wake up early."

"Geeeeeez," Axel breathed out. "Okay. Cartoons?"

Riku looked down and thought. "… Yeah. I'm thankful for cartoons."

Axel grinned; his teeth were bright. "Everyone should love cartoons. And music, too. Music in my car that I can sing out loud to."

"Music is nice," Riku replied lightly. "But I know something better."

"Oh?"

"Headphones…"

"Oh _yeah_. Most definitely."

"… so you can block out your babbling roommate."

It took a moment for the sentence to sink into Axel's brain. While redhead stared, Riku tried to suppress a smile.

Axel huffed. "I see how it is."

Riku couldn't suppress it for very long.

As they went on, it became easier and easier to pick things out.

He hadn't realized that there was so much to be thankful for.

**-November, end**


	4. December

**Author's Notes: **Long ass month.

When I started outlining the story way back, my best friend ordered me to include a particular clothing item. And that's all I'll say about that.

Thank you so much for the reviews! I squeal whenever a new one pops up. Hope you enjoy this installment!

So here we have December, in which there's snow, mall roaming, long unseen friends, absolution, and the beginning of attraction.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter four- December**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

Axel usually stayed out late for his play rehearsals. They had happened often since he got the part—Lexaeus worked his students to the core, drilling their jobs into them no matter how small, until they went home weary and tired. They all knew Lexaeus to be soft at heart though, since he always nodded his appreciation to those trying hard.

Axel thought himself good at acting. He would almost call himself a natural. But that didn't mean he slacked off. When he was given a job, he did it, and he made sure he did it well. He would read the script between typing responses to his online friends—sometimes when Riku glanced over, Axel's hands would even be silently gesturing, wondering that if he put an emphasis _here _instead of _there_, it would sound better.

Of course, late nights weren't anything tragic for the redhead. He'd always grumble in the morning, no matter when he fell asleep, be it late or early.

_This_ morning was no different, although it did feel a lot colder than the previous. Winter had struck.

Someone had opened the window blinds, even after Axel had pointedly closed them last night. This made the sun free to beam in, all bright light but little warmth.

Axel tried to crack his eyes open. One was stuck, but the other managed to quiver at half-mast. He lay there for long moments, contemplating if English was really worth getting up for, and noticed how strangely silent it was.

The shower was not running. There was no rustling in the bathroom, no soft footsteps across the wooden floor, no early bird roommate. It wasn't possible that Riku could've gotten up and ready so quick. Was he still sleeping? Had Axel really woken up first?

He turned his head.

Of course not. Riku was just standing by the window, having opened the blinds.

Bastard.

Axel was able to go through a morning routine simply because it was something he could do mechanically. But right then he had another choice: he could let Riku claim the bathroom first like usual, _or_ he could jump up, get in, and victoriously laugh.

It didn't quite process in his brain, so he stared instead.

Riku was leaning against the windowsill, arms crossed and still dressed in his wrinkled pajamas. He was turned away, hair falling over his shoulders and concealing his face. Riku was completely still while looking outside.

Now, Axel knew when someone was attractive, and he wouldn't lie about it. Not that he'd immediately be struck by Cupid's arrow; it was just mentioned in passing, like some model in a magazine—that _yeah_, whoever it happened to be was nice-looking, and then he'd flip the page and move on with life.

Riku's hair had always been nice. All those times Axel teased him about caressing his lovelocks were not unfounded. It was well taken care of, even if the bangs hung in his face.

Axel kept staring.

He remembered back a couple of months, briefly thinking that Riku had a pretty face.

That was nothing special, though. A lot of people had pretty faces.

Riku had good style, too. His clothes matched in color and design and formed to his body perfectly, whether he was conscious of it or not.

But it was easy to match colors and know what you looked good in. Some just didn't care as much.

Axel remembered really seeing Riku's eyes for that first time in October.

He tried to flip the metaphorical magazine page, but kept thumbing back to it.

No big deal, though.

"You're finally awake."

Flip it and move on with life.

"Yeah, sure," he gurgled back, forcefully swinging his legs over the bed and jumping down.

Riku calmly went back to his window. "It's Wednesday, remember? Go ahead and take your shower."

Wednesday. Right. Riku didn't have a Wednesday morning class.

Axel began to shift around in his clothes for something suitable. "What's so interesting out there, anyway?"

Riku motioned his head once. "It snowed last night. It'll probably melt in a few hours, though."

Snow was pretty cool; Axel could throw it at people. He padded over to look—

"Oh _shit_."

—and was thereafter blinded by the glistening white scenery.

Riku blinked while Axel dramatically held his sensitive eyes. The sun's reflection on the snow didn't seem all that bright to him.

Riku chuckled and tilted his head. "You're a dork."

Axel shrunk back to the bathroom. "And you're a bastard."

* * *

The days were getting colder. It hadn't snowed again yet, but Riku could see his breath in the air. He walked along the campus streets, nearing his History class, and observed the white wisps puffing out of his mouth. Cars noisily rolled by and students bumbled out, excitedly talking about everyday things, along with the upcoming holiday break. Their voices mixed together, weaving through Riku's head.

"I'm going to see my girlfriend down in…"

"… bought my dad the _best_ thing…"

"Hey, is that a new…"

He didn't mean to eavesdrop; it was just easy to overhear. Not like he had anyone to talk to. All he could _do_ was listen.

"… saw this great movie…"

"Did he seriously…"

It was with so many people around him that Riku felt it the most: the need to get out and away. He didn't know where he'd go, or how far he'd go, but only that he _would_, out to anywhere besides where he was. The happy chatter would surround and close him in, and he'd feel so different and… discontent.

"Yeah, man, go see…"

"… really going to love it!"

Riku began to walk faster. He'd just reach his classroom to sit down and concentrate on studying. There'd be no more of that silly weight on his chest.

People kept accidentally getting in his way. He apologized softly under his breath and continued on, making sure to look up instead of at the ground.

And when he looked up one time, he saw Sora.

The brunet was rushing along the street, still courteous to those around him. Riku saw Sora's messy brown hair and his dark blue eyes and wanted to raise his hand and wave.

He tried. He waved his hand high in the air, shouting Sora's name to get his attention, maybe exchange a hello, but Sora just kept jogging away.

Riku's hand slowly lowered, fingers curling. It was loud with the people and the cars, and there had been a lot of students between them. It was understandable the brunet hadn't noticed him. Sora was most likely late anyway. Riku could just catch him later.

"… all planned out this year…"

"… got family and friends…"

"Yeah. It'll be great…"

* * *

They held one last dress rehearsal and everyone was free till opening night. Axel even got back early that Saturday from practice, and he fully intended to make use of the time. He _could_ be responsible and study for finals, which were actually the reason Lexaeus had given them the time off, but no. He was going home for Christmas in a little over two weeks, and what type of person would he be if he didn't bring presents?

He entered dorm number 214, spied Riku reading on his bed, and began to drop his stuff off.

Riku took note when the camouflage backpack was carelessly tossed near Axel's chair. "You're in a hurry," he commented evenly, flipping a page.

"Going out," Axel said, yanking off his shirt to replace it with a warmer one. The late night would get freezing. He made a point not to forget his favorite hoodie. "Gotta get to the stores before they close."

"It's not even dark yet."

"Hey, Christmas shopping takes time," Axel retorted, adjusting the hoodie's arms. "You done yours yet?"

Riku looked up from his book, but not at Axel. "I don't…"

"What?" Axel raised an eyebrow. "You don't get presents for people? That's real cold."

Riku frowned. "I do. Just not very many."

"Stingy?" Axel emphasized by patting his back pocket where his wallet rested.

"No," Riku said edgily, eyes narrowing. "I'm… not very good at it."

"Aahh," Axel said. "I was like you once. Then Olette got to me."

Riku remembered Axel talking about her. He could imagine. "I'll do it later."

Axel shrugged. "All right then. See ya when I get back."

Riku began reading again. Axel opened the door part way, but then stopped.

Olette would've been ashamed. Olette wouldn't just leave. _Olette_ would've seen a soul desperately crying out for assistance, assistance _she_ could give—a chance to impart her wisdom.

Axel twisted around. All _he_ saw was Riku.

Well, it could prove fun.

"Hey," he said, "why don't you come along? Get it done now, and you won't have to do it alone later."

Riku pursed his lips. In actuality, he only bought gifts for two people: his dad and Sora. All his friends didn't mind; they never really exchanged presents because Riku was just _Riku_, a good friend but a little out there. A little out of touch.

For the two gifts he did get, he always felt uncertain. He'd walk around the stores, seeing everything and deciding nothing, because there were so many gadgets, gizmos and fashions, bright lights, decorations and holiday cheer… He'd be a little lost.

And afterward, he would worry that he had made the wrong choice, all the way till Christmas.

He'd never say that out loud though, because then Sora would tell him he didn't _need_ to buy him anything if it caused so much trouble. It was worth it though, to see Sora tear through the wrapping.

But usually Riku would have to do all that alone.

"What'dya say?" Axel prompted, leaning against the doorframe and waving his car keys. "I can even give you some of Olette's pointers. Decide quick, though. I don't have all day."

Riku set his book down. "Pointers? She actually gave you lessons?"

"Yeah, like a list. You know how she is? Real organized."

Riku laughed lightly. He heard so much about people he'd never meet. "Yeah."

The car keys jingled. "So that's a yes, then?"

Riku breathed in deep. "I'll get my things."

* * *

It was strange seeing each other outside the dorm. There was that one time at Demyx's, but that was just _one_ time, and they hadn't even been friends then.

It was weird seeing Riku in the passenger's seat of his car. Usually there was just empty space there, a place for Axel to swing his arm out to when he's singing along with the radio.

It was abnormal to see Axel behind a steering wheel. Mostly he was at his desk with the laptop's glow on his smirking face.

It showed that they were actual people besides just a roommate to walk in on.

"You like music, right?" Axel said, nodding at the compilation of CD cases. A stoplight turned yellow and he slowed down. "Take your pick."

Riku glanced down at the selection. A lot of it had band names he had never heard of. There was also a burned CD labeled _Demyx Presents: The Nobodies_. "It's fine," he said. "It's not far from campus."

"All right. Suit yourself."

Axel drummed his fingers on the wheel and watched the lady in the van before them. She was powdering her nose in the mirror while the light was red.

He wondered if it had been a good idea to invite Riku along. It was one thing to have a friend that you saw everyday out of necessity, but to step out into the world together felt like it was crossing some invisible line.

Better than getting lost in an unfamiliar mall by himself, he guessed.

The light turned green, and the car rolled forward. Riku pointed out the way and Axel followed. There wasn't much talk besides that.

* * *

It took a good ten minutes to find a stupid parking spot. Since Axel was the one driving down all the lanes, he was the one who got irritated.

Axel stuck his hands into his pockets as they walked the long distance to the mall's entrance. He was frowning deeply and trying not to shiver; so far their adventure had been less than fun.

But when the glass doors swung open to reveal three floors of merchandising and heaters, the parking lot didn't seem so bad.

It was a lot bigger than the one they had in his little hometown. He hadn't really thought about it outside, but _inside_ it was hard to ignore.

Axel showed his admiration with three simple words: "This is cool."

To Riku, it was just the same place it always was, whether he had to shop or was dragged there by friends. "It's not bad. They have a wide selection, at least."

They strolled side-by-side, parting when needed to avoid bodily collisions. They didn't say much, except to comment on direction. It was still awkward to be out somewhere with just each other. Sure, they knew some chunks of the other's home life and what they enjoyed, but this was _hanging out_. It was a sacred ritual that only close friends partook in.

Or, friends that had the potential to be close.

Axel glanced at every mini-store they passed. He saw clothes, shoes, electronics, art, novelties, and… _Victoria's Secret_. He raised an eyebrow at some of the window displays and wanted to laugh. Well, if there was ever a way to break the ice…

"We have to go in," he declared, nodding at the mannequin with angel wings and a push-up bra.

Riku took one look at the overwhelming amount of red and pink, and decided Axel was insane. "You can. I'll just wait outside."

"Oh come _on_. Have you seen some of the stuff they sell? It's hilarious."

Riku watched a middle-aged woman in the store observe some lacy undergarments. "I really think I'll just wait outside."

Axel spread out his arms to frame the red sign above. "But this is classic _comedy_ for us gay men. I took Roxas in a couple of times, and even _he_ found it funny."

Riku crossed his arms and stared at the clean tile floor. "I don't see how it could be amusing."

"What, that stuff makes you uncomfortable?" Axel asked, almost sincere. "You'll get over it. Besides, one of Olette's rules: don't let your personal insecurities get in the way. If she wanted a new bra for Christmas, then I sure as hell can't wuss out looking for one."

Riku sighed. "There's no one I'd get something like that for."

Axel heard the sigh and knew it was time to back down. He rolled his eyes. "No fun, Riku. Wait here. I'll only be a few minutes."

Axel disappeared into the lace and pink, and Riku chose a bench to sit on. He kept looking up every few seconds to see when Axel emerged, but at the same time, he didn't want to be spotted walking away with him.

When Axel did return, he held a _Victoria's Secret_ bag.

Riku cautiously watched Axel approach the bench. Really, he didn't want to know.

Axel grinned wickedly and told him anyway. "I got you something. I saw it and just couldn't resist."

The bag was held open under Riku's nose. Lying in a tiny heap at the bottom was an aqua thong.

"… You…" Riku stuttered, mouth hanging open and eyes widening.

"I call it the Man Thong. I thought it matched your eyes."

Indeed it did.

"I can't _believe_ you…"

"I am pretty unbelievable, aren't I?"

Riku looked at Axel's smug face, then back at the unlikely gift. Then back again at Axel's face.

It slowly sunk in.

And it actually was sort of funny.

* * *

Axel was forced to carry the bag the rest of the way. They visited each interesting store and leisurely talked; Axel made sarcastic jokes, Riku made smart comebacks, and it was just like in their dorm, except out in public. Riku learned more of Olette's pointers, and even managed to buy two items. Axel didn't get a chance to see them and didn't bother to ask whom they were for.

It turned late enough to make their stomachs hungry and their feet sore. Riku led them to the food court. It was loud and hot there, but it smelled good.

They split up, got their dinners, and met at an unoccupied table.

Axel's many bags, as opposed to Riku's one, were set safely at their feet. He was almost done with his Christmas shopping.

Axel had his large pizza slice from _Sbarro's_, and Riku had his Chinese delicacy. To Axel, it looked like a crazy mesh of brown and white. He thought he saw some rice mixed in.

He had to hold the pizza with both hands since it was big and a little crumbly on the bottom. The cheese wouldn't separate completely when he bit into it, so he had keep pulling till it broke.

Riku was cleaner. He used a plastic fork and napkin and took small, even bites.

"Remember those automatic massaging chairs?" Axel said after chewing. "Man, they felt good. I'd totally get one if I could."

"Yeah," Riku agreed lightly. One brown mesh was consumed.

"I think that free trial gave me an orgasm."

The brown mesh was promptly choked on. "Axel…"

The redhead appeared totally innocent. Some cheese dangled. "What?"

"… nothing."

They ate in silence. It wasn't a bad silence, though.

Axel ordered a second pizza slice, this time with pepperoni. Riku finished his meal first and patiently waited.

He watched a few people go about their lives. There were teenaged friends, parents and their children, and young couples. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Axel drop a pepperoni into his mouth.

"Today was fun," Riku said suddenly.

Axel paused to stare and blink. Riku didn't meet his eyes. "Yeah," he finally replied. "It was. You're pretty cool."

Riku watched a particularly endearing child carry two soda cups to her mother. "You are, too."

"Should we do this again, then?"

Riku nodded.

"Awesome. I'll buy you more thongs."

It was the thought that counted.

* * *

_Hay21: you're oddly excited. did he hit on you or something?_

_FireGod: No, numbnut. Not all gay guys hit on all gay guys. Well... not seriously, at least._

_Olette: I think it's really great that you two are turning into such good friends. and you took him shopping!_

_SnickerBar: he learned from the best ya know_

Hayner, Olette and Pence had been hearing a lot about Axel's roommate the past few days. Often Riku was the unknowing subject of their online conversations. He remained ignorantly on his side of the dorm.

_Olette: he sounds so cute. I wish I could meet him…_

_Hay21: not like youd have a chance. axel would sooner steal him away._

_FireGod: Oh, is _that_ how you dream of me?_

_Hay21: shut up man!_

_SnickerBar: haha he got u that time_

_Olette: you two always bicker!_

When Axel signed on and got invited to their chat, he always had something to say. Maybe it would be an update on Larxene, or something goofy Demyx and the band did, or how his teachers were, but a majority was about his roommate. Riku said this and it was _funny_, Riku went there and it was _cool_, Riku did that and it was kinda _cute_…

_FireGod: He's just a friend, you guys._

_Hay21: little defensive there, arent we?_

_FireGod: I only tell it like it is. Not my fault if you're jealous._

It was easy for them to tease Axel since he _was_ gay and they had learned Riku was, too. It was fun to tease him, even though there might be nothing of that nature going on. Axel expected it from them anyway, so he wasn't bothered. He knew the truth.

Axel knew when someone was attractive.

But that was it.

A few things were still open, after all.

_SnickerBar: did roxas tell u hes coming back for winter break?_

FireGod didn't enter a reply.

* * *

It was the night of the play, just a couple of days before finals. Axel left the dorm early and Riku promised he'd be there.

The campus auditorium was dark. Only pathways were dully lit. Students, parents, and play-lovers conversed idly, shuffling to their assigned places. Riku excused his way to the mid-section and peered at the numbers on his ticket till he found his.

It wasn't that he came just for Axel. He normally went to the college plays anyway; they had talented, aspiring actors. Seeing his roommate and friend on stage was a certain plus, though.

He had found Leon and Cloud outside earlier. They talked about what they had heard of the production until the overhead lights flashed, warning that it was about to start.

They flashed again. Second warning. People quieted and settled down.

Lexaeus walked on stage and spotlights beamed. He began to speak about the play's history, and how they had turned it contemporary.

Riku didn't listen fully. He was browsing the brochure.

"_The Ghost of Christmas Past…_ Axel Hitzig."

Well, time to see what he'd been working so hard on.

Lexaeus exited, and the red curtain opened.

The set design was beautiful. Artistic skyscrapers were painted on varying background layers, fake snow littered the stage, and up front were rows of buildings and scenery that could be switched in and out. A modern businessman Scrooge began hum-bugging the passing, cheerful pedestrians.

The story played out. It was enjoyable, amusing, and a little sad. The college's usual stars held the largest roles.

Scrooge's clock finally struck midnight. A breeze passed through his bedroom, and there was the sound of an acoustic guitar being strummed off-stage.

Axel sauntered into the spotlight while he plucked at his little guitar. Riku had to hold a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing. Axel hadn't been lying when he said he got to dress up like a hippie. He wore tie-dye, with bracelets, necklaces and beads hanging all over. Purple-tinted sunglasses were perched on his nose, and his pants were far too baggy, but his hair was already perfect. He walked with a stagger and talked with a drawn-out slur.

Axel was good at acting. He said his lines with the same careless, sedated voice he had been directed to. He wasn't amazing or mind-blowing, but he was good. He worked hard to be good, and down there on the stage, under the gaze of many—that was his place.

For that whole segment, Riku's eyes never left Axel's expressive face.

He made the best hippie ghost ever.

* * *

Finals week had started. Ansem opened his apartment door and walked off while Riku invited himself in. The latter took his spot on the bed and began to empty his backpack. He had written the English essay, memorized all the History, practiced all the Art, and just had the bothersome stuff left.

Ansem made the answers painfully clear. It wasn't long before Riku was putting his books away. Ansem just worked on his own graduate classes.

Riku zipped up his backpack. "Did you see the play?"

"I was busy," Ansem said lowly. He didn't look up.

"Axel was in it."

That time he did, with a raised eyebrow. "The roommate?"

Riku nodded and straightened out the covers. He knew Ansem became disgruntled if they weren't straight. "Yeah. He's a good guy."

"You didn't care about him before."

"That was a while ago," Riku retorted, looking over his shoulder at the older man. "He's okay now."

The pen Ansem held scratched something down. "I see."

Riku ran a hand through his hair and grabbed his belongings. "I need to leave. Axel wanted to order out somewhere tonight. He'll eat everything if I don't get there soon."

"I trust you can show yourself out."

Riku left with a small nod.

There had been no mention of Sora.

* * *

Finals came and went. The fall semester was over. Teachers said their goodbyes and students filled their spring schedules before going home.

Axel was packing clothes. Most of his things he left behind; he was coming back anyway. The Resident Advisor had assured him the dorms and their occupants were staying the same till fall.

Riku helped. He didn't have much to move to his house, anyway.

"Hayner, Pence and Olette think they're gonna surprise me by meeting me at my house," Axel said as he stuffed some jeans into a bag. Riku thought about how wrinkled they'd get. "But I already know. They're pretty predictable."

"Don't be disappointed if they're not there," Riku said. He took the jeans out and folded them.

Axel stuffed more in. "They will be. I mean, they love me. How could they not?"

And Riku took them out. "I'm just saying. Don't get your hopes up too high. They might come later, that's all."

"Man, you can be really depressing sometimes," Axel snorted, crossing his arms.

Riku blushed as the folded jeans were carefully packed. "Sorry."

Axel rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Oh, and thanks for helping me pack."

Riku looked at him incredulously. "Helping? I'm practically doing it all myself."

"That's because you're not _letting_ me do it."

"And that's because you're a slob."

"I am _not_…"

The next morning, Axel left. They said goodbye, have fun, and that they'd see each other in a couple of weeks.

When Riku drove back alone, it was uncomfortably quiet.

* * *

After a long few hours of cruising along highways and singing out loud to his favorite CDs, Axel was home.

It was same suburban house on the same suburban street. The same blue van parked in the open garage. The same wind chimes on the front porch that his mother so adored. The same singsong doorbell, and the same parental faces welcoming him inside.

But there was a white car on the street that had not been there before.

While his dad went to carry his son's luggage in, his mother ushered him to the living room.

Same worn couch, same crummy TV. He loved them.

The Christmas tree was already set up in its stand, but it was bare. Boxes of lights and ornaments were around it. They usually decorated together.

Hayner, Pence, and Olette weren't there, though. His mother said they were coming by later. Axel laughed ironically, but didn't say why.

But there was a blond boy sitting at the kitchen table that had not been there before.

Suddenly Axel knew why his three friends were coming by later.

"Axel, honey," his mother said tentatively, "Roxas is here. He came to town yesterday. We told him you were coming today, so he's been here waiting all afternoon."

Axel stood in the doorway with his hands in his pockets and his posture slouched. He didn't smile or frown; he just sort of stared.

Roxas sat with his hands folded on his lap and his eyes on the table. He was taller than before; he had grown some over a year. His hair was a little shorter, maybe, but still unruly. Axel saw the silver cross necklace hanging around Roxas's neck.

"You still have it," he said. Casual comment.

Roxas's hand unconsciously clasped the pendant. "Yeah."

Nothing more. Axel's mother bit her lip and tapped her fingers together. The air was thick.

"Why don't you boys go talk in Axel's room?" she suggested, her voice higher than normal. "Your father will leave your things at your door. Go now, shoo!"

They were marched up the stairs, and Axel's mother heard the door click shut.

* * *

Axel remained leaning against his closed door. Roxas busied himself by looking at all the CDs, actions figures, and posters Axel collected. He'd seen them all before. There was a new one here and there, but nothing too drastic of a change.

He tried to pick up one figure, but his hands were shaking. He set it down and pretended they weren't.

"Sooo…" Axel drew out the 'o', smacking his lips. "How's your college?"

"It's fun," Roxas replied. "Met a lot of nice people there."

"So have I."

"That's great."

"Yeah, it is."

Roxas shuffled his feet. Axel scratched the back of his neck.

"You wanna sit down or something?" Axel offered, waving to his bed.

Roxas nodded and chose the side opposite of Axel, who sat Indian-style. The blond played with the loose threads on the blanket's pattern.

Pleasantries seemed strained, so Axel didn't ask more questions. He wanted to, though.

_Where've you been? Who'd you meet? What're you thinking? Why'd you come back?_

"The others will be here in a couple of hours," Roxas said quietly. "I saw them yesterday. It was really nice."

"I bet they've missed you." Axel's sharp green eyes studied Roxas's face.

_And why didn't you call?_

"They have." Roxas almost smiled. "They were really happy to see me again."

_Then again, why didn't I?_

It took effort for Axel to look away. Roxas shifted a little. There were things to be said, but they couldn't quite get them out. There _always_ seemed to be things between them, stirring just underneath the surface.

Roxas took a deep breath. And then, he said it: "I'm sorry."

Axel shrugged and tried to crack his back. No big deal. "About what?"

Roxas started a word, choked on it, and started again. "The past year. We stopped talking after I left home for college."

"Oh? I hadn't noticed."

"Axel," Roxas said sternly, "stop playing around it." His blue eyes were firm.

The redhead grinned warily. "Could never get stuff past you, could I?"

The eyes softened. "No. Not really."

"Hah…" Axel swung his legs around and lay on the bed. "You, uh…" He licked his lips subconsciously. "You shouldn't be so sorry."

"I got afraid," Roxas admitted. He accidentally pulled a thread from the blanket. "I really like you, but…"

"Hey, don't worry about it."

Roxas looked at Axel. The redhead was staring at the ceiling. He could remember the sleepovers they held. One time they stuck glow-in-the-dark stars up there. "What?"

Axel shrugged. "Don't worry. I think I get it. Understand, I mean. We got new lives after high school. And, yanno, I think this was long in coming anyway."

"I don't mean it like—"

Axel's gaze stopped him. "Neither do I. What, you thought I'd be hurt or something?"

Roxas blushed. "Kind of. You were my best friend."

"Were?" Axel murmured. His smile faltered, but he kept it up.

Roxas rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Well… when we got together…"

"That really messed it up, huh?"

"It, uh…" the blond stammered, then spoke normally: "Yeah."

Axel sat up abruptly. The mattress caved under his weight. "I think so, too. I liked it better before then."

Roxas got that same hopeful look on his face that he did a couple years back. "Really?"

"You bet," Axel said, turning to face him. "So let's do this over. This time around, we'll get it right. Just like in those cheesy movies."

Roxas smiled, and Axel remembered that he missed it. "All right."

Axel cleared his throat and held out his hand. "The name's Axel. Get it memorized."

Roxas took his hand and shook it. "Roxas. Nice to meet you."

"Friends?"

"Friends."

"Awesome." Axel smirked and rubbed his hands together maniacally. "So… does this mean we can still flirt?"

His answer was a pillow to the face.

* * *

"Welcome home," the note read. "I will be working late tonight."

There was another scribble, like the writer had half a mind to add more but decided not to.

Riku left the note on the table after skimming it. His father's neat signature was in the corner: _Sephiroth_. No signed Dad or Father—just… Sephiroth.

It wasn't anything new. His father had difficulties being a father; things always felt strained between them. He tried though, and Riku guessed that's what mattered.

The house was large, spacious, accommodating, and empty. He carried his few things to his room and shut the door.

Sometimes he wished his dad would try a little harder. But it was okay. Really.

He fell asleep before Sephiroth came home.

_Happy Holidays._

* * *

Christmas came sooner than expected. Riku gave his father his gift; it was cordially accepted with a thank you. Riku hadn't expected anything more. He opened his presents, all expensive things because Sephiroth was a wealthy man. Riku had all the latest clothes, technology and hit novels.

Sora came over the day after. He showed off all his new things and gawked at Riku's stash. Riku told him his face would stick that way. Everyone knew that.

He showed Sora the neatly wrapped gift bought at the mall. He loved it when Sora's eyes lit up so much.

_"If all else fails, if none of these pointers seem to work, then you just gotta use your gut."_

_"My gut?"_

Sora held the chain necklace up, smiling with an open mouth. Riku was promptly tackled.

_"Yeah. You know, a gut feeling. When you see it, you'll know it. It'll be the perfect gift."_

He hadn't worried so much this year.

Axel was surrounded by his friends on all days except Christmas. He gave them their presents: Olette approved, Hayner grudgingly said it was cool, Pence excitedly rambled, and Roxas was Roxas. Roxas was just finally _there_.

They hadn't prepared presents for each other. It had been so long; they weren't really sure how anymore. But it didn't bother them. They had to take little steps.

They could still talk like they had before though, all five of them. It felt so good to be home with them and his parents. Everything was great.

One present Axel got was a small television for his dorm.

Being able to rent movies with Riku was the first thought he had.

**-December, end**


	5. January

**Author's Notes: **I'm so sad at the lack of AxelRiku content across the Internet. I've managed to pick out the few there are and leave my two-cents. Maybe I should make a revolution.

Oh! I made an AxelRiku C2 called _Spontaneous Combustion._ Aha.

Mwah. Sorta melancholy chapter. Also, reviews make me giddy. Thank you, everyone!

Off we go into January, in which we muse with alcohol's help, waste cell phone minutes, squeal over singers, and exchange long soul-baring monologues.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter five- January**

by: Rosalyn Angel

**-**

Hundreds of people were so close together that elbowroom was nonexistent. They all stood in a town square, hugging their special someone and staring up at the gigantic clock ticking toward midnight. It was bitter cold: mittens, scarves, hats, and heavy coats were common. Some were holding horns and anything else that emitted noise, but most were counting on their voices to get the job done.

An announcer began a countdown from ten.

At zero, the clock struck midnight. The crowd burst out yelling, horns started blaring, and confetti fluttered through the night sky.

_"Happy New Year!"_

While the scene transpired on the television, Cloud blew on his own little party horn. It made a sound acute to a kazoo.

Cloud made Riku use his, too. He hadn't bought them for fifty cents each to let them go to waste, after all.

They sat on the couch in the living room of Cloud and Leon's apartment. The television was their only light. Beyond its small radius, things were shadowy and indistinguishable.

Leon was currently absent—he had gone home for winter break to visit his family (especially his sister Aerith) and girlfriend. Although his hometown was the same, Cloud had stayed in Traverse. He never really explained why.

Riku wasn't bothered. Leon was more of Cloud's friend than his. Truthfully, if Cloud weren't around, he didn't think he'd feel comfortable with the stoic brunet.

Cloud always assured him that Leon was a good guy. Just a _little_ introverted, he'd say.

Sometimes, when they were all together, Riku felt like he was intruding. Leon and Cloud had known each other long before Riku had ever come into the picture. Cloud was a good friend, though, and Riku couldn't deny him of Leon's company.

But it was nice when they had time alone like this.

Cloud sipped from his wine glass full of _Baileys Irish Cream_. It was an alcoholic beverage that tasted smooth and sweet. He really wasn't one for alcohol—the cream was the only type he'd drink—and just brought it out for special occasions.

Riku didn't like how it made his eyes water, so he nursed a soda instead.

While streamers and happy faces filled the television screen, Cloud raised his glass in a toast. "Here's to one more year."

Riku clinked his can against the glass' rim. "Cheers."

"Cheers."

Riku took a large gulp. The soda fizzled down his throat. "Have you made any resolutions?"

Cloud licked his lips of the extra cream. "Oh, you know. Get good grades, get a better job, convince Leon he's actually bisexual. The usual."

Riku laughed lightly. "Good luck with that."

"I'll need it. You?"

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Nothing specific. Just to get through, I guess."

Cloud turned down the TV's volume and put the remote on the side table. The announcer's voice became a murmur. "That's a good one. Enough to get you to the next year, right?"

"Yeah, and it can always apply to the one after that," Riku said, smirking.

"A never-ending resolution… That's deep."

"You know I try."

"Try too hard, maybe," Cloud retorted, taking another sip of cream. "When do you need to head back?"

Riku looked to the side, into the darkness of another room. "Whenever. I told Dad I'd be out really late."

Cloud sighed heavily. "Good. I don't like your dad."

Riku turned back and furrowed his brow. "Cloud…" he began warningly.

The blond held up one hand. "I'm just saying. He's not the most courteous of people. I couldn't imagine living with him."

"It's not that bad," Riku defended quietly, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.

"Yeah, well…" Cloud started. They had had this conversation before. "… Whatever."

Riku's mouth quirked into a brief smile. "Been around Leon too much, huh?"

"Too much? No," Cloud said, looking up. "Just enough."

Riku looked at him. In the television's glow, Cloud's eyes were brightly blue, and his face was angular and handsome. His hair was naturally messy, tamable only by the strongest of gels, and stuck out all over his head.

Riku thought that they could've tried something when they had first met, if they wanted to. They thought each other as good-looking, and they enjoyed being together. It was just one more possibility, out of many others. At that time and now, the idea wasn't appealing enough to follow through.

"Hey, Riku," Cloud started softly, closing his eyes.

"What is it?"

And in all sincerity, he asked: "You ever wonder if you're going to grow up into an old, bitter, lonely gay man?"

Riku didn't answer. He looked down and ran his thumb over the soda's label.

"Man…" Cloud muttered, setting his glass aside. He flopped an arm over his face and slouched. "I think I've had enough cream."

"Yeah," Riku said, but it felt forced out. He pictured the necklace Sora now wore. He would be with him right now, but Cloud had called and Sora wanted to see Kairi anyway…

Cloud sighed and glanced at his friend. He swallowed unsurely; he knew that look on Riku's face. "Hey," he said, "it'll be okay. Even if that ends up true, at least we'll get to beat people with canes."

Riku chuckled lowly. "My roommate would love hearing that one."

Cloud had heard about him—that redhead from the school play. "It is funny, huh? You should tell him it."

"Yeah," Riku said, smiling. "I will."

* * *

Spring semester for Traverse University started mid-January. After a couple of weeks with familiar faces and places, it was high time Axel packed and hit the road. It was hard though, separating himself from all he cared for. He had gone without it for several months, more than ever before, and now he had to do it again. He knew he'd make it through—it was just a little trying to take that first step away.

With the help of four friends in particular, his car and trunk were packed with Christmas goods. They each said goodbye in their own way and left.

Roxas lingered longer than the rest. He and Axel stood against the car's side and watched the clouds pass by. They spoke of high school memories and where they planned on going.

There was an understanding that things will probably go back to how they were before. They'd go to their different colleges and lives, not talk often, and once in a while remember the past.

There would be one difference, though: a sense of closure. There'd be no more uncertainty and no more regrets. If by chance they dialed each other's number, it would be met with nostalgia and laughter.

It was an understanding that meant no matter what happened, no matter where they ended up or how much they ever talked, they could still pick up right where they left off.

Axel spent one last night at home with his parents, and left early morning.

* * *

Axel's cell phone sat in a cup holder while he drove down the highway. His little white jeep was clunky but fast, and sometimes he went over the speed limit without realizing. He weaved in and out of the passing lane, whistling to his radio and checking his mirrors often.

It had been a good winter break. He felt light and cheerful.

The old ice cream shop had been refurnished in his absence, and Hayner, Pence and Olette had been more than happy to show it off. They had gotten the most remarkable brain freezes, considering the low temperature. He remembered how Roxas's left eye twitched after consuming a strawberry double-decker.

It was a long ride back to his university. He had a lot of time to think.

He thought about Olette's tedious planning of movie times, how Pence ordered enough to feed four full-grown men, and how Hayner rolled his eyes when Axel made a joke, only to make a better one in return.

He thought about Roxas and how long it'd be before they talked again. He thought about how he wouldn't mind if it turned out to be a while. It was all right now. He got it.

He'd go back to Traverse and see Demyx, his band, and the professors. He'd call Larxene and hang with Riku.

Riku was most likely moved back in already. He was probably reading on his bed. Axel swore vengeance if Riku had taken the top bunker.

The cell phone's screen glowed dimly in its cup holder. Commercials played on the radio.

It was a long ride.

Maybe he should call. Just to let Riku know he was coming.

Axel expertly drove with one hand and browsed through his phone's contacts in the other.

* * *

It was late evening when Aladdin sang from Riku's cell. He set aside his book and stepped over his unpacked belongings to answer it. The caller was identified as Axel.

Riku held the phone between his ear and shoulder as he returned to his bed. "Hey."

"_S'up. I'm in the car now. I should be there in around two hours. You didn't take my bed, did you?"_

Riku looked up at the empty bunker. He thought he heard a truck pass Axel by. "Don't worry. It's all yours."

"_Good. Anything exciting happen while I was gone?"_

Riku shook his head, even though the redhead couldn't see it. "Not really. I stayed with my dad and spent time with some friends."

"_Aw, c'mon. _Something_ had to have happened."_

Riku recalled New Years and smiled. "Well…"

He told Axel about growing old to beat people with canes, and about the gift he'd gotten for Sora. Axel laughed and said he'd _told_ him that Olette's pointers always worked.

They exchanged stories about their break. Riku didn't keep track of time—it might've been sooner or later, but when Axel was talking, a name was mentioned that he hadn't expected.

"Wait, hold on," Riku interrupted. "Roxas was there?"

"_Oh."_ It sounded like a slip. _"Yeah. He came back for the break. Guess I left that part out."_

The extent of Riku's knowledge was that Axel and Roxas had been together but hadn't spoken for some time. He imagined it was awkward, seeing each other again.

Things got quiet. There was a long sigh over the phone.

"_Yeah, he was there."_

Riku turned to face the wall. The conversation suddenly felt stilted and unsure. For several moments all he could hear was the background noise of cars and the redhead's faint breathing. Then, in an almost subdued tone, Axel began:

"_Yanno, Roxas and I go way back. We've been best friends since forever."_

It reminded Riku of Sora. He concentrated on the wall and Axel's voice.

"_Around my senior year and his junior, we decided to give it a shot. A relationship. We both knew we were gay—thought what the hell, you know? Couldn't hurt to try._

"_It was weird at first. We didn't get into it right away. He was cute though, and we knew each other for so long. Maybe it could work out. I thought it went okay, until he graduated and moved to another college. Our calls kind of lessened with time. You know what they say—it slipped away quietly? Something like that."_

There was a pause, like he was waiting for a reply. None came.

"… _maybe I should've figured it out then. He didn't call me, but then again, I didn't call him. Sorta funny, actually."_

Axel's voice was distant. All the words kept flooding out. This was so much deeper than the stories he told before. Maybe he just needed to tell someone; maybe it needed to be someone who might understand a little, or who was simply unbiased enough not to judge.

All Riku could do was listen. It felt wrong to speak. In some odd way, right then, Axel was unbelievably real.

"_Can't really blame one or the other. It was both of us. I think we had a hard time picturing each other as anything beyond friends. I think that's what messed us up._

"_It's all right now, though. A whole year, and it was fixed in a few days. People can be really stupid sometimes, I guess._

"_I don't know when I'll see or talk to him again. But, yanno, Hayner once said something like it was more about not forgetting each other. I can't really say how much he thinks of me, but hey… I got my end covered."_

It stopped there. Nothing more was needed.

"_Riku?"_

It took Riku a minute to shake himself out of his daze. It was hard speaking. His voice wouldn't go above a whisper. "Yeah?"

"_I'm almost there. I'll see you soon."_

The dorm was so quiet. "Okay."

Slowly, they hung up.

* * *

Upon Axel's arrival, Riku offered to help with his luggage. The boxes were carried in and unpacked, along with Riku's, and Axel's new TV was hooked up on his desk. It only received local channels, but _Blockbuster _would make up for that.

They chatted normally. There was a thin layer of hush-hush over their words, though—something stronger was there than before. In a way they were nervous. Nothing was spectacularly different or special—they were still Axel and Riku. But the words from the phone call hung over their heads.

A few days passed and things smoothed out. They fell back into routine, attended their new classes, and sometimes went out together to eat, see a movie, or roam.

Sometimes, Axel found his eyes straying to Riku's unknowing form. Like waiting in line for popcorn, when Riku wore a ponytail, Axel would watch how his neck curved into his shoulders. Or how when Riku laughed, his eyes would slightly squint and he'd run a hand through his silver hair. And when he worked at his desk, his lips would lightly purse while he held his chin.

There were other little things that Axel not only glanced at, but also stared when Riku wasn't looking. Like when he exited the shower, the wet hair would stick to his face. Some mornings, while Riku switched shirts, his pants would be low enough to show his hipbone. And when he hung his head to hide an embarrassed smile, the little dip in the skin above his collarbone would deepen.

There was also how he could be quick with words, how his voice softened, and how there was a veiled yet complete acceptance of who Axel _was_.

They were just things that Axel noticed and thought were nice.

* * *

One Friday, Axel managed to convince Riku to visit Demyx and _The Organization_ again. Riku wasn't the most comfortable around a group of people he didn't know well—he hadn't really been over to Demyx's much after October—but between Axel and Demyx's arguments, he honestly couldn't say no.

They sat on the raggedy couch while _The Organization_ tuned their instruments. Today's snack had been chocolate muffins; Axel was still licking his fingers. The only band member missing was Demyx. He had claimed there was something of great importance to announce before practice and rushed upstairs.

Seifer had started snapping at Yuffie for being annoying when Demyx tore downstairs in a half-run and half-fall.

"You guys!" Demyx shouted, waving his arms frantically. A piece of paper was held in one hand. "This is the best news _ever_, I swear!"

"Your parents decided to put you and Yuffie up for adoption?" Seifer jeered, plucking at his guitar.

Yuffie stuck her tongue out while Luxord raised his hands for peace. Zexion sighed woefully.

"Noooo," Demyx said, giving a long, hard stare. He thrust his arms out and displayed the paper. It was an advertisement. "_The Nobodies_ are on tour!"

Yuffie's head shot up. "What!" She had a crush on the lead singer. He was _so cool_, she'd say.

Zexion feigned interest while pressing some keys.

Axel leaned forward to peer at the advertisement. He saw _The Nobodies_ on the stage with bold letters about the tour and a list of cities they were appearing in. "Hey, the kid's right."

"Of course I am!" Demyx squeaked. "I wouldn't lie about this! Look, look—" He motioned a finger near the middle of the list. His goofy grin was wide enough to crack his face. "They're performing at the Riverfront near us in April! They're actually coming here! Can you believe it? The best band on Earth is coming _here_!"

Seifer wasn't nearly as obsessed as Demyx. He was also their harsh voice of reality. "You'll never get the money for the tickets. Do you know how damned expensive those things will be?"

Demyx's face immediately fell. Somewhere in the background Riku heard one of Yuffie's drumsticks clatter to the concrete floor. "But…"

"None of us are well off, if you hadn't noticed," Seifer snapped. "You might as well forget about it."

Axel looked at Demyx's increasingly depressed face. The redhead flinched. Seeing Demyx sad was so wrong. "Well I don't think it's _impossible_…"

"He'll get over it," Seifer muttered, looking down and frowning deeply. "Take your places, morons. Let's start."

Yuffie bit her lip. Demyx was shuffling his feet. Zexion and Luxord exchanged looks that clearly said they were staying out of it.

Riku watched as Demyx dragged himself over to his instrument. He had half a mind to defend him, but technically what Seifer had explained was true. Demyx had just seemed so _ecstatic_.

Their playing was toned down from their usual enthusiasm. Axel grooved a little in his seat to lighten the mood. He even put an arm around Riku and swayed. Riku tried to shrug him off, but smiled all the same.

Between his friends, Demyx couldn't stay down for long.

* * *

Ansem was working on a thesis. Riku had arrived earlier, not so much for homework, but for the silent, brotherly company that only the older man could provide. Now Riku was lying on Ansem's bed, eyebrows furrowed, while Ansem appreciated the quiet.

It didn't last very long. "Axel's in a night class," Riku said lowly to explain his presence.

"Good for him," Ansem murmured, scratching out one line from his paper.

"I've been seeing Demyx more lately."

"Oh?"

"He's really… excited about things. Especially that band of his."

"I see."

They were typical Ansem answers. Always distracted or disinterested, but answers nevertheless.

"He found out _The Nobodies_ are on tour," Riku said, folding his hands on his stomach. "They'll be here in April. But no one thinks he'll get money for the tickets."

"A shame."

Riku turned his head to the scholarly man. "He was really sad about it. He looked forward to seeing them a lot."

"A true shame."

Riku gazed at him for a while longer. Ansem didn't look up or indicate he had actually heard anything before.

Ansem was Ansem. But sometimes, Riku wondered why he ever bothered.

* * *

It was one of those nights.

Axel lay awake, staring up with one arm hanging over his bedside. The only audible thing was the heater.

January had come and gone before he knew it. _Time flies, eh?_

He'd been thinking a lot lately. Well, he thought a lot anyway. He was a thinker. It usually wasn't on the deepest of subjects, but he still _thought_.

Just made it sort of hard to sleep at times, was all.

Good thing he always had company.

"Axel?"

His head shifted a little when Riku's tentative voice drifted up. "Yeah?"

"Are you awake?"

Axel paused. "… That's kinda a dumb question."

Riku paused longer. Axel could imagine him lightly blushing. "Sorry."

Axel yawned and felt his jaw pop. "What's up?"

He didn't hear anything for a while. He knew an answer would come eventually; he only had to wait for it.

"Remember…" Riku's voice was thoughtful. "Remember when you told me about Roxas? While you were driving back?"

Axel couldn't forget. But he hadn't expected it to be brought back up. "Yeah."

"And you know my friend Sora?"

"The kid you met in junior high?"

Riku made a sound akin to a yes.

Axel could tell where this was going. "What about him?"

Another long pause. Axel waited.

Finally, Riku's voice came again: "He has a girlfriend named Kairi."

And then Axel just knew. It was easy to figure out. A no-brainer.

He fidgeted a little in his bed; the springs squeaked. He wasn't really good at comforting people, and he never expected comfort for himself. He usually brushed things off with a light-hearted joke, changed the subject, or simply left. But he knew how it was to get something off your chest.

Riku had listened to him when he needed it. The least he could do was return the favor.

"So, how long have you liked him?" he murmured.

It was a little weird how easily they understood each other. Maybe it was because they hung out so much, or maybe it was just because they were both gay. He guessed it was good to have someone like that, though.

"A while," Riku said. "But I don't think he's ever noticed."

Axel remembered that, after talking to Riku on his drive to Traverse, he had felt strangely peaceful. He had turned off his phone, left the radio's volume low, and drove. Maybe he thought about things, but he couldn't recall any. It had just been… really nice.

That feeling was coming back. Lying there in the dark, talking, listening, and imagining Riku's expressions and movements.

"He can pretty oblivious," Riku said quietly. "That might be for the best. Kairi makes him really happy."

Axel heard him move. He pictured Riku twisting onto his side and burying half his face into the pillow. His long hair would cover the other half.

"I'm glad he's happy. But he's always doing other things, like being with her."

Axel's arm, the one hanging over the edge, swung a little. Unlike him, Riku needed encouragement to keep going. "You miss him?"

"… Yeah. I do. He's my best friend. Even if I didn't like him, I'd still miss him."

Axel didn't reply. It seemed uncomfortably familiar.

"Sometimes," Riku said, now whispering, "sometimes I get this feeling. Like I'm restless. I want to get out. Go somewhere else, away from here. It gets really bad sometimes, but I don't actually know what it is."

Riku's eyes could get a little distant. When Axel glanced at him and saw it, he pretended not to notice.

"It's worst when there's a lot of people around. I don't know. I see them all smiling, and I just…"

Riku trailed off. Axel could see the aqua eyes in his head.

"Hey," Axel said, "you okay?"

Riku's reply seemed a little off. "… I'm fine."

Axel wanted to look over the bed and see him. He wanted to ask again, if Riku was sure. But he didn't. He wasn't very good at comforting.

"It's pretty late," he said. "Maybe we should go to sleep."

"Yeah," Riku said, then added, almost as an afterthought: "Thanks."

Axel didn't quite know what for. "Sure thing."

But he could guess.

**-January, end**


	6. February

**Author's Notes: **Many great thanks to all who read this, and many more to those who review! You guys keep me on my toes.

Here's a chapter I've been really excited about! Hopefully I haven't messed anything up…

I struggled with some scenes, sadly. I hope they're good?

So we dive into February, wherein the flirtation begins.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter six- February **

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

If there was one thing Larxene was good at, it was stating the obvious. It wasn't the type of obvious that _everyone_ would notice, no—it was the type of obvious where the person in question had no clue while _Larxene_ could see perfectly.

In this case, the person in question was Axel.

_"You _do_ know you're totally head over heels for this kid, right?"_

Axel gazed at the wall blankly. He sat in his desk chair, alone, with his cell held next to his ear. He _had_ been talking about what he and Riku did yesterday, about the gross fast food, when Larxene had so rudely interrupted.

He was pretty used to the Riku jokes from his hometown friends. Larxene had implied it here and there, but this was the first time she ever said it straight out.

He calmly replied, "You're drunk, aren't you?"

Larxene laughed sharply. _"Oh please, Axel. I'm a girl. I can tell these things."_

Though lately, the jokes were getting harder to brush off. Whenever mean friends like Larxene said stuff, he'd get reminded of how Riku had looked, sounded, or acted at some point.

"I'm _gay_," Axel said, enunciating the word into the mouthpiece. "What would a girl know about gay relationships?"

_"That doesn't matter, stupid. It's easy to tell that you really like this kid. Fancy a good romp in the sheets with him, would you?"_

Riku's pretty face invaded his mind. "He's a good friend. Of course I like him."

_"There you go again. The way you talk about him. Here, let me show you how it sounds: ooohhh, _Ri-_kuuuu! Uunnn…"_

And that brought about images of Riku's neck and hipbone. Axel hunched over in his chair. "You're so full of it, Larxene."

_"And then he'd go: _please_, Axel, that feels so _good_, aahhh…"_

Now he was thinking about Riku's mouth and how it curved in a smile or opened with a laugh. Axel slowly lowered his head onto the desk. It landed with a soft _thunk_.

_"Right there, oh God, oohhh!"_

"I seriously never want to hear you moan again," he mumbled into the desk. Unfortunately, the desk didn't care. Neither did Larxene.

_"Hahah! See, now you're mumbling. Get over yourself, Axel. It's really obvious."_

Axel could see all the little wood grains. "No, you're just drunk."

Larxene said something about getting Riku drunk, but he held the phone away to glance at the door. The knob rattled as it opened and Riku stepped in.

Winter had not been kind to him. Riku looked tired and worn out from a cold he had had for the past several days. Even then, he still diligently attended classes.

"Gotta go," Axel said into his phone and flipped it shut. He figured Larxene was used to the abrupt goodbyes by now.

Riku massaged his temple, dumping his books by the door, and dragged himself to his bed. "All I want to do is sleep."

Axel surveyed the drooping eyes and sluggish footsteps. "Yeah, you look like crap."

Riku glared as he stripped off his shirt to change into his nightclothes. "Shut up, all right?"

"Well, geez, sorry," Axel said, eyebrows rising. Note: a sick Riku was a moody Riku.

It was kinda cute how his voice got nasally from his stuffy nose, though.

Riku sat on the edge of his bed as he yanked on his lightweight pajama pants. Axel sat backwards in his chair.

"Say, Riku," Axel started suddenly, slouching, "did you have any boyfriends before you liked Sora?"

Riku looked up at the question, blinking widely. "Where did that come from?"

"I'm curious."

He kicked his dirty clothes to the side and vowed to clean them up later. "… Not really. Just a couple of girlfriends that didn't work out."

Axel grinned. "For obvious reasons."

Riku laughed lightly, sniffing once. He lied down under his covers and curled up. "Yeah. I think I really upset them."

"I can imagine. Yanno, I never bothered with girls. I knew I liked guys. I had one or two boyfriends before Roxas, but…"

There was a soft whistling. Axel stared at Riku's closed eyes and figured that he had fallen asleep. The small whistling came from his stuffy nose when he breathed. Axel stared for a while longer.

He knew when someone was attractive.

And the idea just might be appealing enough to follow through.

* * *

Riku and Naminé managed to end up in the same class, Storyboarding, for their spring semester. The subject was right up Naminé's alley, so it hadn't been a surprise to see her walk in the first day. Riku had taken it because it seemed interesting. He enjoyed cartoons and drawing, and Naminé was always saying how art might be good for him.

They sat next to each other near the back, sketching in their books. Naminé's story was light-hearted but thoughtful; she drew colorful scenes in each panel. Riku's was all penciled in and darkly shaded.

The class worked and chatted about the upcoming holiday while the professor wandered the room, peering over their shoulders. Riku tensed whenever he felt the looming presence behind him.

While he was writing in some description, Naminé set her pastel down and glanced over. "How is yours doing, Riku?" she asked.

He brushed away some of the excess lead on the page, careful not to smear. His cold from before was gone. "It's all right. I'm almost at the end."

Naminé smiled kindly. "You're good at this. You should make it your major."

Riku looked at his project. The sketched boy on the page looked back. "Maybe."

She tucked some errant blond hairs behind her ear. "Riku," she started slowly, "you'll need to decide eventually."

"I will, Naminé," he said, meeting her eyes. "Just not now."

"I think it'd make you happy."

Riku remembered how Axel had been on the stage, how the redhead had been completely immersed in his element, his _place_.

"I'll decide soon," he defended, erasing a small part. "Don't worry about it."

He heard her soft sigh as she went back to her booklet. They worked a little longer, sketching, erasing, writing, until Naminé quietly spoke up:

"I thought about making you a valentine."

Riku froze, his hand poised over the paper.

He hadn't really told her he was gay. He hoped it was obvious enough.

Naminé was looking ahead. Her voice was gentle. "I had it all designed. It was going to be really pretty."

He found it hard to tell her, even after seeing all the sketches she drew of him. He had a hard time telling anyone. She always understood everything, but he didn't want to make her sad. Naminé should smile peacefully all the time. That was just… Naminé.

He tried to say something. "I—"

"I'm not going to make it, though."

He stopped himself, head shaking. "What?"

That same smile spread across her face. "It wouldn't accomplish much. I shouldn't pursue it."

He stared at her. Her smile grew wider. "How…"

"I really like you, Riku," she explained softly, laying a hand on his shoulder. "But I know you don't feel the same. I'm not sure why, but I can tell."

The class kept working and talking in front of them. One or two students in the next row up looked back but didn't comment.

Riku hung his head, long bangs obscuring his face. He should've known. Naminé always figured him out.

"It's okay, though," she said, leaning down to see him. "I thought about it, and I don't mind. You're my friend. I don't need anything more."

He looked up at her. But all she did was smile.

* * *

It was Valentine's Day. Everywhere Riku looked, there was some joyful couple hugging and kissing. He saw flower bouquets, heart-shaped chocolate boxes, cute stuffed animals, and there was even a guy bent on one knee holding out a ring. The girl stood flabbergasted, then squealed and tackled him, while their small group of friends clapped and cheered.

There was another couple. They were sitting on one of the benches under the shade. They rested their heads on each other, hands interlocked and eyes closed.

Riku walked right past them on his way to his next class. He gripped his books tightly.

He heard them talking. He heard all the affectionate compliments, gleeful thanks, and proclamations of love. He heard clips of dinner and evening plans. Hands held, eyes locked, and bodies close, people promised that tonight was going to be _wonderful_.

There were stragglers, though. They walked, loveless, hands stuck in their pockets. Some were forlorn, and some didn't care. They strolled with their friends and deemed that relationships weren't all they were cracked up to be.

Riku walked right past them, too.

The campus was crowded. People were happy. They were smiling, and Riku walked right past them all.

Good for them.

"Riku! _Riku_! Hey!"

He stopped and looked behind. There was a pretty girl running to him: long auburn hair, wide violet eyes, little black boots and smooth slim legs. She really was pretty.

She stopped right before him, hunching over and panting. Then she craned her head up and beamed.

"Kairi," he greeted, smirking. "You didn't pull a muscle, did you?"

Kairi playfully punched him in the shoulder. "You haven't changed, Riku. Nice to see you, too."

"Heh, yeah," he said. "Still the same. You look nice, though."

She had makeup on: a little blush, eyeliner, and foundation. Maybe some pale pink lipstick. "Really? You think so?" She laughed and twirled around, raising her hands in the air. "I wanted to look really good. I'm meeting Sora after his class for our date tonight."

His smirk faltered. "I bet he has a great place in mind."

She looked sheepish, folding her hands in front and swinging her arms a little. "Oh, you know Sora. He's goofy, but a sweetheart."

_I know._ "Yeah, you guys will have fun," he said lightly.

Kairi nodded, combing her fingers through her hair.

She always did that in high school, especially during class. Sora really liked her hair. He said it smelled like lavender shampoo. Kairi made Sora happy.

Riku never blamed her for anything.

"What about you?" She tilted her head curiously. "Anything special planned tonight?"

"Nah," he said, shifting his weight onto his other foot. His books were tucked under one arm. "Just staying at my dorm."

Her lips twisted into a pout. "That's no fun. Isn't there anyone you could go out with?"

"Kairi," he laughed, ruffling her hair. She squeaked in protest. "Ever think that some people might _enjoy_ being single?"

She shirked away from his hand. "Maaaybe," she teased, sticking out her tongue. "Maybe not."

Kairi was a good person.

Riku chuckled. "You're impossible sometimes."

"You know you like it!" she exclaimed, standing on her tiptoes to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you around, though, okay? I need to fetch Sora."

She hugged him, and he returned it with one arm.

Kairi was good for Sora.

"See you," Riku murmured.

She waved and disappeared into the crowd.

Good for them.

* * *

When Riku came home later that night, the dorm was empty.

He opened the door and all the lights were off. Even Axel's laptop was shutdown. Riku tried not to feel disappointed.

He trudged inside and flipped the overhead light on. Axel's hoodie was missing from his chair, but his backpack was lying against it. Maybe he had gone out with friends. Or maybe he had met someone.

Riku shook his head. He would've heard about it, if that were the case.

He set his books down and turned on the heater. Its humming took over the silence.

Then, Riku turned around and looked at his dorm. His bed was made, his dirty clothes were in their hamper, his desk was clean and organized, and even his books were stacked in a neat little pile. Axel had some papers strewn beside his laptop, one desk drawer was open with his headphones hooked on it, and a wrinkled shirt was hanging over the side of his bunker.

Riku remembered all the people he had seen and heard earlier. He remembered walking into an empty dorm with no plans of going out.

That was when he realized how sad it actually was.

His vibrating phone shook him out of his stupor. Taking it out from his back pocket, he saw the familiar envelope icon and pressed buttons till the text message was opened.

_Meet me by the main hall fountain asap_

Axel.

Riku grabbed his jacket and left.

* * *

Axel closed his phone, sat down on the fountain's edge, and waited. The main building was behind him—the first thing he had seen upon stepping out of his car five months ago.

The stone fountain was in the middle of the lawn. It had several spouts, all displaying steady streams, with the largest and most impressive at the top. The base was wide and the water was deep. Axel swiveled his head to stare at his dark reflection.

There were few people left in the campus streets. They were either out somewhere, or already sleeping. One or two couples were sneaking back to their dorms.

Honestly, Axel didn't have a clue on what he intended.

It was Valentine's Day, though, and he knew Riku wasn't going out anywhere. All he'd do was come home and mope at his desk. Axel didn't like it when Riku moped. It wasn't fun.

He thought about the distant look Riku's eyes could get.

And then Axel just thought about Riku's eyes.

"Hey."

Axel looked away from the water and saw his roommate. "S'up."

Riku sat down next to him and leaned forward, elbows on his knees. The trickling water made background noise. "Why did you call me out here?"

Axel grinned. "Didn't think you wanted to be cooped up all night on Valentine's Day. That might've gotten a little depressing."

Riku laughed lowly. "Yeah. I guess it would've."

A girl was walking across the lawn. She glanced at them and giggled indiscreetly.

Riku pursed his mouth. "Should we go someplace else?"

Axel's eyebrow rose. "Why?"

"Don't you think people might get the wrong idea?" Riku said, looking down. "It _is_ Valentine's Day, and we're..."

The redhead rolled his eyes. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

Riku sighed. "I'll never understand how you can be so comfortable telling everyone you're gay."

"Aw, Riku's insecure about his sexuality," Axel cooed sarcastically. He tried to pinch Riku's cheek and wiggle it, but his hand was swatted away. "That's so _cute_."

"I'm not—stop—" Riku swatted at Axel's hand again. "—insecure. I just don't like people getting the wrong idea."

Some couple looked at them as they passed.

"So what if they do?" Axel said. "It's not like you'll see them again."

Riku's face was scrunched in a frown. "I know—what are you doing?"

Axel's arm slung around Riku's shoulders. "What do you think? I'm giving people the wrong idea."

Riku tried to shrug the arm off, but it stubbornly stayed. "That's not funny."

Axel thought it was. He grinned and squeezed Riku closer. "See? It's no big deal. Lighten up."

Riku glanced at the remaining students. He tried to use one hand to pry Axel's off. "All right," he said. "Just get off, would you?"

"Why? You uncomfortable?"

"Axel, I mean it—"

"Okay, okay." Axel relented. His arm was lifted away. He always knew when to back off. "I was just joking."

Underneath his silver bangs, Riku's cheeks were red. "I know."

Axel smiled widely. "You're still insecure."

His answer was a stern glare.

For a while longer, they sat on the fountain and talked. Their conversation was normal. Nothing extraordinary. But Axel's eyes were always intent on his friend's face.

Somewhere between Riku's blush and the walk home, he finally figured it out:

Larxene had been right.

* * *

_Olette: what are you going to do?_

_FireGod: Hell if I know._

Axel and Olette were in a private chat. He didn't want Hayner jeering at him or Pence poking fun. They were good guys and all, but they were _guys_. He knew from experience that girls were generally better at this stuff.

_Olette: axel, are you sure about this? what if it turns out like roxas?_

_FireGod: I thought about that, okay? I'm not dumb._

He thought about it a lot. He wondered if he was making the same mistake.

Then he remembered what Riku looked like standing by the window while it snowed outside.

_FireGod: Man, this crap is too complicated. Why can't it ever be easy?_

_Olette: hehe, you wouldn't think it was fun then._

_FireGod: Touché._

It really was complicated. Riku liked that Sora kid.

_FireGod: You know, I don't know if I'm going to do anything._

_Olette: that doesn't sound like you._

_FireGod: Well, what do you expect me to do then, princess?_

_Olette: you know how you flirt with hayner?_

_FireGod: Yeah?_

_Olette: something less than that._

_FireGod: Gee, thanks for the tip._

It was good advice, actually. Riku didn't take direct advances well.

_Olette: just think of it like this. would it be worth it?_

Axel twisted in his chair to see his roommate doing homework on his bed.

Riku caught the glance. "Something wrong?"

Axel turned back to type. He remembered the soft admissions that January night. "Naw, it's nothing."

_FireGod: Well, there's one way to find out._

* * *

It was a late February night when Axel wildly burst into the dorm, camouflage book bag in one hand and something hidden in the other. Riku sat at his desk, stunned, as the redhead dropped his goods and slinked over. The door was left open, shuddering from its forceful impact against the wall.

Axel towered over his friend's shoulder. "Got you a present."

Riku rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Did you have to be so loud?"

"Did I scare you? How unfortunate. I know your little heart can't take much excitement."

Riku glared at him from the corner of his eye. "Scared?" He smirked then. "I don't get scared."

"I'll consider that a challenge for later," Axel said. "Ready for your present?"

Riku eyed the grinning face skeptically as he got up to close the door. "What are you up to?"

"What?" Axel frowned, pretending to be hurt. "Can't I do something nice for a friend?"

The door was shut and locked. Riku shook his head and looked down, smiling. "Sorry. You've been around Demyx a lot, so I thought his devious nature might be rubbing off."

"Who says it hasn't?" Axel took that moment to reveal his mysterious present. His hand brought around a DVD case, displaying it in full view. "Surprise! What do you think? I saw it and immediately thought of you."

"_Aladdin_?" Riku said, staring at the colorful case in shock. "You bought me Disney's _Aladdin_?"

"Yeah, you like it, right?" Axel began picking at the plastic wrapping. "That one song is your ring tone."

"It's better than that thong."

"That was _funny_, and you know it."

"I'll never admit it," Riku said, walking over and taking the DVD from Axel's hands. He picked off the seals and popped it open. His eyes were almost wistful. "I haven't seen this since I was a kid."

"We can watch it now," Axel offered, nodding his head to his small television. "Come on, it'd be fun."

Riku glanced at his computer, which had a half-written essay, and then at the TV. "… Yeah. Sounds good."

Axel plucked the disc away. Riku frowned. "I'll set it up. Grab the blankets and pillows."

"Sure, make me do the hard part," Riku drawled, walking to the beds and yanking the comforters off.

"You need the exercise."

He laughed dryly.

Whenever they watched a movie, their procedure was simple: dump all the pillows and blankets from the beds onto the floor. The chairs got uncomfortable after a while, and they could even lie down this way. Usually though, they just sat on the pillows while Axel hogged the blankets.

Once the floor was ready and all lights were turned off, they took their places. Axel clicked through the DVD's main menu. The screen blackened, and the movie played.

Riku's eyes were glued to it. He had a tiny, nostalgic smile. Axel's eyes were glued on Riku.

Things were silent through the first few minutes, but when Aladdin started dodging the guards and singing, Riku spoke up:

"You know, I had a crush on Aladdin when I was younger."

Axel chuckled. "It's the hair, right? Or maybe the chest?"

"Both," Riku admitted, looking at Axel briefly. "But I really liked him when he sang _A New Whole World_."

"You wanna ride his magic carpet, huh?"

Riku gave a patronizing glare.

"I'm joking, joking."

He leaned back with his hands supporting him. "I know. It's just… I was pretty young. I really like the idea of seeing the world like that."

Axel rested one of his hands near Riku's, not quite touching. He watched the little smile and small glint in those aqua eyes. "You're a romantic, aren't you?"

Riku laughed lightly. "Yeah, I guess I am."

"I think that's kinda nice."

He blinked. The redhead was watching the screen now. "Huh?"

"I said," Axel started plainly, "I think that's kinda nice."

Riku stared at him. He hadn't expected a response like that.

Axel didn't look over. His face, lit by the television's glow, was completely serious.

"Oh…" Riku murmured. He turned his attention back to the movie. "… Thanks."

"You're welcome."

The movie played on. Once or twice Axel thought about shifting his hand over. It'd be just subtle enough—only a few fingers would overlap. Nothing big. He could pass it off as an accident.

As soon as he made up his mind to do it, Riku moved to lie on his back.

Axel drummed his fingers on the floor and let out a puff of air.

It was a start.

**-February, end**


	7. March

**Author's Notes:** March is a month of transitions and fluff.

I'm really happy with how everyone is enjoying the story!

Also, if you have a song that you think fits this fanfic, PM me the artist and song name. I'm such a music whore.

Hereafter we waltz into March, where we have casual touching, birthdays, tickle fights, and pre-made plans.

We're also closer to what we all want.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter seven- March**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

Axel made sure to be just the right amount of casual. He didn't have much of a choice—between Riku being a good friend and him liking Sora, Axel had to be ready to brush the flirting off as nothing.

Besides, he wasn't even sure himself. He knew for a fact that he liked Riku; it was too hard to ignore. He just thought a lot on whether or not he should go through with it, and that maybe things were best as they were. After all, he didn't want to goof up again like with Roxas.

But really, when it came right down to it, comparing the ups and downs and Riku to Roxas, Axel reminded himself that there was one way to know for sure. If he _did_ goof up, well, things would work themselves out. And this time, he wouldn't let it take a whole year.

Besides, with Riku parading around in their dorm shirtless, what else could a guy do?

First, he had to subtly coach Riku into noticing him. This was accomplished in small steps: stretching his legs in the morning; standing a little closer when talking; occasional, random gifts; a longer stride when walking; off-handed compliments; and most importantly, the casual touching.

It had taken several years of personal experience, but Axel knew the ins and outs of casual touching. For instance, a hand on the shoulder is nothing big—it could be taken as a comforting or platonic gesture. With the right variations, though, it can become more intimate—move the hand down onto the arm, grip a little softer, let it stay a little longer.

There was also the hand between the shoulder blades; ruffling perfectly fixed hair; 'accidentally' bumping into each other; a playful, teasing arm around the shoulders—

Riku, unfortunately, proved to be a hard catch.

* * *

Riku kept looking at him.

Axel sat at his desk, typing at his keyboard, and tried not to feel smug. Riku was completely innocent about it, after all—his eyes were only regarding the redhead for _educational_ purposes. Axel knew this because Riku had a sketchbook in hand.

Riku hadn't said anything before doing it. He just sat on the edge of his bed, yanked out some paper and pencils, and carefully studied his roommate before sweeping his hand across the page. His eyes continually flittered between Axel and his work.

Axel pretended like he didn't really notice or care. It was comforting that Riku had assumed his roommate would be okay with this, and really, Axel was more than okay. He saw it as an opportunity to show off.

And that was why he kept changing position.

He stretched his arms way above his head, giving a fake yawn, and made sure his shirt rode up. He rubbed the back of his neck and moved his fingers slowly around the skin. He grabbed his chin as if in thought and brushed his thumb along the bottom of his lip.

Then he glanced at Riku to see his progress. Riku looked annoyed.

Axel smirked, slouching back. "You want me to pose or something?"

Riku was frowning at his paper. "Sorry. I didn't think you'd mind."

He really didn't. Axel used one hand to tell his online friends he'd return soon and sat sideways in his chair. "It's cool. What are you doing, anyway?"

Riku sighed long and hard and set his sketchbook down. "Practicing. My friend Naminé convinced me to start doing it more."

Axel craned his head around to try and see from his seat. "Can I look?"

Riku glared at his drawing and willed it to become better. "It's not very good."

"It's just sketching, right?" Axel stood up and sauntered over. Riku quickly held the book away. "It can't be that bad."

Riku shook his head. "It can. You're hard to draw."

Axel stood up straight and crossed his arms smugly. "Is that a compliment?"

"Well, your nose is really long."

Axel's smugness faltered—

"And your hair is so weird."

—collapsed into itself—

"So in all the pictures, you're bald."

—and then died.

"Gee, thanks," Axel drawled, sulking back to his laptop. "You're real flattering."

Riku laughed and picked up his pencil again. "I'll show you some later, all right?"

"I can't _wait_…"

* * *

Some kid on their floor never finished his _Domino's_. Not that Axel complained—he didn't let it go to waste. His trips to the community fridge were becoming more frequent, as soon as he found out how convenient it was to steal a piece of pizza that wouldn't be missed.

But he digressed. Riku was sitting at his desk and working, and Axel was sitting at his and _not_ working. He popped the last piece of crust into his mouth and began Flirting Attempt Number Twenty-Two. He had a good feeling about this one.

"How's it going?" Axel asked lightly, leaning over Riku's shoulder and peering at the computer screen.

Riku tilted his head away from the pizza breath, but didn't seem bothered otherwise. "I'm researching for a paper."

It was some foreign artist name that Axel couldn't pronounce. He turned his face to his friend and smirked, staying close. "You work too hard. Relax."

"Unlike you, I want to pass."

"Hey," he said, frowning, "I do well, okay?" Standing up, he stuck his hands into his pockets. Now that he had Riku's attention, he quickly added on: "Listen, Demyx and the band's throwing a party for me pretty soon. You're coming, right? It's this Friday."

Riku turned in his chair and gazed at Axel curiously. "What for?"

Axel grinned like the Cheshire cat. "My _birthday_. I'll be twenty-one."

Riku ran a hand through his hair. "You didn't tell me your birthday was soon."

"Don't worry," Axel reassured, patting Riku on the back. "There's still plenty of time to shop for a present."

Riku almost choked. Axel's hand was still there. "Present?"

"You bet." Triumphant, Axel went back to his desk and took out his headphones. "I'll be expecting great things, Riku."

If anything was said in protest, he couldn't hear it over his music. After all, he didn't want to spoil his excitement.

* * *

Friday came.

_Hay21: happy birthday, dorkface_

_FireGod: Do I get a kiss?_

_Hay21: NO_

_SnickerBar: lol_

* * *

When Demyx came to pick Riku and the birthday boy up, Axel was extremely pleased to see Riku with a bag. It was a gift bag with stringy handles, stuffed with colored tissue paper and hiding a delicious little treat inside. He had a hard time staying still on the car ride over. Seifer remarked on this, saying he didn't have to be so antsy just because he was a legal drinking age now.

But Riku had gone _shopping_ for him.

Of course, Axel teased his roommate all the way, trying to peek inside or lift some of the paper. He loved giving stuff, but he also loved receiving it.

Upon arriving at the house, he discovered one thing: Demyx's mother knew how to host a party.

He had never seen so much _food_. The woman shopped and cooked like mad.

Axel barely heard all the happy birthdays before he lunged at the snack table. Demyx was right there with him.

Yuffie had on a little cone hat with streamers at the tip, waving around an oblong balloon and poking Luxord with it. The blond dramatically declared he was being molested while Yuffie's father bellowed about no funny business. Seifer cackled and drew his own balloon, drawing Yuffie into a duel. Zexion sat the table, boredom all over his face, as he stared at Demyx diving his _Tostito's_ chip into some dip like an airplane.

It was exactly the type of situation where Riku would normally feel closed off. He'd hang back, cross his arms, and listen without a word. He'd study all the balloons and streamers, all bright and floating and filling the warm house. He'd watch all the normal people bound about and chatter excitedly, and—

Axel walked over to him, away from the rest, and gently grabbed Riku's wrist. "Hey, c'mon. You gotta try this cheese platter. It's _awesome_."

With one tug from his friend, Riku smiled and let himself be led.

* * *

After the initial splurge of junk and snack food, they went downstairs to the practice room where Demyx's mother would later bring the cake. They talked as usual, and Demyx teased Axel about sitting so close to Riku. The redhead would've seen this as a perfect opportunity, if Riku hadn't cut in and assure that they were only close friends.

Axel clicked his tongue.

Thankfully, Demyx's mother came parading down the spiral staircase with a large cake. It had the numbers _two_ and _one_ proudly staked in the middle, already lit, and the whipped cream icing was dyed red along the edges. On its face, little stick figures of the band were drawn, each by their respective identities.

Yuffie made sure to point out her ninja star being flung at Seifer's stupid beanie hat. Seifer had, in turn, squirted a gray dot from the icing tube and claimed it to be a bullet going for Yuffie's face.

The band preformed _Happy Birthday_ on their instruments, Seifer growling out the lyrics like a real rock star, and Axel blew out his candles. He asked if he could light them again for sport and was denied. Afterward, he expertly cut the pieces and handed them out on plastic plates, complete with a fork and napkin.

Then he watched Riku eat.

Because really, a fork going into someone's mouth and slipping out clean could be highly provocative. Axel munched on his white cake and tried not to stare, but it was really hard, especially when Riku gave a little satisfied, "Mmm."

He was relieved when everyone deemed themselves full. Demyx's mother beamed, her creation appreciated, and took the utensils upstairs to throw away.

Now came the part Axel had been waiting for. _Presents_.

Immediately he went for the gift bag that had a little card signed _Riku_ hanging on the side, but his roommate ordered to save it for last. Axel glared and tore through the others to get to the main course. Not that he didn't appreciate them—he _loved _them, even the gag book on gay sex Seifer and Demyx had bought. There were a lot of DVDs for his television, and a new hoodie from Yuffie because, "That one must be getting so _old_." Luxord had gotten him a certificate for a local casino; very thoughtful, even though he didn't gamble. Zexion, surprisingly, came through with several new CDs.

After a mushy moment, Axel sarcastically spouting his love for them all, Riku handed him the bag.

Axel could hardly contain himself. He grinned widely and looked at Riku, yanking off the card and opening it. On the inside, it read:

_I told you I'm not good at giving presents._

He glanced at Riku with a scrunched brow, but the other had his face turned away.

Ripping through the tissue, Axel worked down into the bag. Wrapping paper and ribbons surrounded him; they could hardly see the floor.

At last, he reached it. It was soft and feathery light. He pulled it out slowly, and gawked.

From his fingertips dangled a black thong. Fire designs were etched along the sides.

Everyone stared. Riku tried to hide his smirk.

And then Axel burst out into roaring laughter that only he and Riku understood.

* * *

Riku was watching the people outside Ansem's window, the older man working as usual. Chemistry notes were strewn over the bed covers—Mr. Vexen taught a mean science class. Ansem had made it tolerable, just as Riku expected, so he'd get a good grade and never have to take another science credit again.

He guessed that meant he wouldn't have a reason to visit Ansem's apartment anymore.

Riku heard the flittering of papers behind him. Ansem hummed thoughtfully, and there was the scratching of a pen.

Outside, cars were rolling along the packed streets. People hugged their jackets and each other close. Spring was around the corner, so the temperature often fluctuated. One day would be pleasant, while the next would be freezing. The grass was turning greener though, Riku noticed.

He put a hand on the cold window glass and watched a young woman walk her dog. Her smile was almost visible.

He remembered Axel's boisterous laughter then.

"Axel thought his present was great," Riku spoke suddenly, strongly. "Or 'awesome,' as he'd say."

He didn't hear anything from Ansem.

"He's twenty-one now, so he has a lot more freedom. Said he wouldn't do anything stupid, though."

Riku took his hand off the window. It was getting too cold and clammy.

"He's really fun to be around. Even at the party, he made me feel comfortable."

That was when he turned. Ansem still sat at his desk, intently proofreading over his paper. There was no glance, no incline of the head, no quirk of the mouth. Riku gazed at him for a long time, waiting for something or _anything_—some imparting of wisdom or _acknowledgement_.

His work was already done. Riku didn't know why he still had his notes out. He didn't know why he was still there. Even through all the small hints, he didn't know why he hadn't seen it before.

"You don't really care about anything I say, do you?"

There was a short pause. Ansem's orange eyes met Riku's narrowed ones.

A smirk slithered across his dark face. "My apologies. You were talking?"

After a while, Riku broke their eye contact. He swiftly walked to the bed and gathered his things. "I'm going home. Thanks for the help."

He didn't see Ansem's eyebrow rise, because he was already showing himself out.

* * *

Axel had taken great care to _not_ remind Riku that today was Saint Patrick's Day.

Riku was in the shower while Axel sat at his laptop, browsing some joke sites. The younger had to leave for his Storyboarding class, so he wouldn't be in the restroom for much longer.

Sure enough, the water was turned off. Axel heard rummaging and waited excitedly. Everything depended on whether or not Riku wore green. Given that he didn't like wearing green, this was highly likely.

Several intense minutes later, the doorknob turned. Riku exited, wearing overly baggy jeans and his favorite black, sleeveless zippered shirt. Axel gave a nonchalant wave and pretended to be interested in his computer screen.

Flirting Attempt Number Twenty-Seven.

He glanced back to see Riku concentrating on finding a lightweight jacket from his chest drawer. _Perfect_.

Ever so quietly, he got up from his seat and sneaked over, avoiding all the squeaky floorboards. Now, Axel was a crafty guy—he used whatever he could to his advantage, be they real or legend.

_Those pesky leprechauns._

Taking a moment to admire Riku's wet hair and the small patch of neck that showed through, Axel readied his pinching fingers and attacked.

Riku was not appreciative. He spun around with a deep scowl, hand shooting up to hold the abused neck. "What was that for?"

Axel feigned innocence, hands in his pockets. He leaned forward with a smirk. "Those leprechauns just aren't happy with you. Shouldn't you be more considerate?"

Riku's glare melted into a thoroughly confused look. "What are you talking about?"

Axel sighed and crossed his arms, slowly shaking his head. "All they want is a little respect."

Riku regarded him for a while longer. "You're so weird."

He returned to his drawer, shifting some clothes around. Finally, he spotted his white vest under some other shirt. He began to pull it out, arms up and leaving his sides vulnerable. This was his mistake.

There was a sharp prick on his waist. Riku hadn't expected another pinch, especially on his side, so he ended up biting down a yelp and jumping away from the attacking fingers.

Riku was completely ready to snap around and give Axel an earful, but upon meeting his face, all Axel did was stare. The redhead was smart and observant. Between the jump and yelp, he was able to figure something out.

"… You're ticklish."

Riku was wide-eyed and frozen. He searched for words to deny it, but only came up with: "No, I'm not."

Axel let his brightly lit eyes travel to the spot where he had pinched. Then he stared at that, too. The little cogs in his mind were turning.

His pointer finger slowly reached out. Riku watched it, determined.

One poke later, Riku was clenching his jaw and shutting his eyes. Axel was giddy.

"You _are_ ticklish!"

"Axel," Riku calmly began, eyes still shut, "I am not—"

If he had looked, he would've seen Axel reaching out both hands in half-fascination and half-awe. Unfortunately, Riku was so intent on convincing Axel that he was _not_ ticklish that he dug his own grave.

An indescribable feeling bloomed along his sides, and a very large desire to double over and escape exploded in his stomach.

Riku choked out some words, something like "no" or "stop", between several sharp breaths. He bent down, legs buckling and trying to cover his waist or curl into a fetal position. Axel was grinning widely and dancing his fingers over all possible vulnerable areas. Riku had his mouth clamped shut, gagging some laugh that came out more as a snort.

Axel stopped and regarded his roommate. The wet silver hair was hanging in his face more than before and he was hunched over, shoulders up high and muscles tense, using the dresser as support. Riku glared at him.

There was a short moment of peace where Riku glanced at the door and Axel cracked his knuckles. There was also an understanding of what was to come.

Honestly, it was too good to pass up.

When Riku tried to bolt to safety, Axel was not forgiving. Riku was more muscular, but Axel was fast, cunning, and knew his weakness. The younger man's arm was caught and yanked back; their bodies collided roughly and Axel got a mouthful of wet hair. His escape averted, Riku went for grappling—their hands clasped and tried to force the other down and away, Axel twisting free from time to time to aim for Riku's side. It always made Riku distracted just enough, giving a bark of unwanted laughter, for his roommate to gain the upper hand.

The battle was strenuous. Their breaths were short, straining against each other, Riku biting out playful threats that Axel was going to die for this, while the redhead just chuckled and tickled him again.

Axel thought, somewhere in the back of his mind, between trying to stay alive and win, that Riku's laugh was really nice.

Eventually, after a tickle to his stomach, Riku's hands slipped from Axel's arms and merely went on the defensive. He collapsed to the wooden floor, curling up and covering as much skin as possible, hiccupping between laughs and pleading for it to just stop. Axel knelt by him, the victor, and relented.

They took long minutes to catch their breath. Riku uncurled and managed one more threat of impending doom.

Axel was still smiling, hands on his knees. He looked at Riku's flushed face, his long hair all over, eyes closed and face pointed to the ceiling, one arm flung over his heaving stomach.

Riku's aqua eyes opened. From behind thick silver bangs and dark eyelashes, he returned Axel's gaze and maybe even blushed. "What is it?" he asked quietly.

Axel swallowed once.

_Be ready to brush it off._

"Nothing," he said lightly, grinning. "You should just see yourself. It's… funny."

Riku rolled his eyes, running a hand down his face. "It's your fault. I'll probably be late for class, too."

"Nah." Axel sat back. "You'll get there on time."

"Maybe," Riku murmured, taking a deep breath. "But you owe me for this."

Axel laughed lowly. "Whatever you say."

* * *

It was a weekend night. They were meeting Demyx and Seifer at a café.

"Are you almost ready?" Axel said, watching _Cartoon Network_. He swiveled his spiky head around to see Riku pulling on his white and yellow vest.

"Yeah, in a few minutes," Riku answered, grabbing his brush.

"Riku, your hair looks fine."

He glared and quickly ran the brush through. "That's because I actually take care of it."

Axel chortled and clicked his TV off, standing to retrieve his hoodie. "What, and I don't?"

"If you do, it's hard to tell."

Axel was about to respond, but Riku's cell phone buzzed on the desk. Riku knitted his brow and walked to answer it.

_Sora._

He stared at the caller's name. It kept ringing in his hand. It had been so long since they saw each other or talked. Sometimes, Riku had even been able to forget.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" Axel asked, pocketing his car keys.

Riku blinked. "Uh, yeah." He flipped it open. "Hey, Sora."

Axel paused.

_"Riku, you're there! Great. How've you been?"_

Riku glanced at his friend, who was sitting down.

"Fine," he said softly, one hand in his jean pockets. He faced away from Axel and spoke to the wall. "What's going on?"

_"It's been a while."_ Sora's voice was still the same. _"I was just wondering if you wanted to get together tonight, like a movie or something. We could hang out at my place afterward."_

Riku looked over his shoulder. Axel had his eyes on the door.

Sora wanted to see him tonight.

_"There's this new movie that's really great. I think you'd like it. It's showing in about an hour, so we can still catch it if we meet up now. What do you say?"_

"Hey," Axel called out, green eyes anxious, "we shouldn't keep Seifer and Demyx waiting for much longer."

_"Riku?"_

Axel stood up and walked over. He put a hand on Riku's shoulder and urged him away, nodding to the door. "Come on. We gotta go."

Riku raised his eyes to him. The hand on his shoulder tugged a little.

Sora wanted to see him.

But Axel was ready to go.

"… Sorry, Sora," Riku finally said. "I already made plans."

There was a short silence. _"… Oh. Well, that's okay! Maybe another night. I'll call you."_

"Yeah." He turned to face Axel. "I'll talk to you later, okay?"

_"Okay, Riku. See you!"_

He hung up and stuck the phone into his back pocket, suddenly feeling quiet. Axel smiled and waved him to the door.

By the time they reached the car, Riku was already laughing.

**-March, end**


	8. April

**Author's Notes: **People love me, yay! I have so many Internet husbands and wives now, lol! Thanks so much for the support, guys. Hearts.

Side note: there actually is an ice cream place like the one described. It's the cutest place _ever_.

Here we swing into April, where we eat ice cream, color eggs, smile in large crowds, and have palm-to-palm realizations.

We're also on the verge of what we all want.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter eight- April**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

The first day of April was one of Axel's favorites. It served an excellent excuse for whatever devious prank he cooked up, whether it was with Demyx or otherwise. Demyx had all the makings of a genius—he even topped Axel on some ideas. He was still just a kid though, so he hadn't quite learned to watch his back, especially for his own partner.

Between Demyx's squeals, Seifer's angry yells, and Riku's incessant blushes, it had been a very fulfilling April Fools.

And so, that night, Axel decided to celebrate with some pizza from the community fridge. Sure enough there was the familiar _Domino's_ box sitting on the middle shelf. He flipped it open, discovering inside two whole pieces and one half-eaten. As usual no one was around to witness his thievery, and really, one slice wasn't all that much.

In the dark kitchen, Axel couldn't see that the cheese had been slightly shifted from the crust and that there was more sauce than normal.

Idyllically he sauntered away, one hand stuck in his pocket and the other raising the pepperoni pizza to his mouth.

One bite later, his eyes were watering, his tongue was on fire, and he was at the sink pouring many, many glasses of that sweet, cooling liquid.

In the fridge and under the _Domino's_ lid, a sticky note was plastered. It clearly read in black marker:

_Happy April Fools, you punk. Stop stealing my food._

* * *

When Riku came home that day in early April, there was a surprise waiting for him. It was a small white envelope, tossed carelessly near the books on his desk. He tilted his head, letting his backpack slide off his shoulder, before he glanced at his roommate. Axel was at his laptop, laughing at something he found online and giving only a wave when Riku had walked in.

"What's this?" Riku asked, taking the envelope into his hand. Turning it over, he saw his name neatly written in ink. The letters were perfect and clean, almost like typed font.

Axel quelled his snickers and twisted his chair around. "That? I found it slipped under the door after class today. Didn't say who it's from, so I left it by your stuff."

Riku gave an amused smirk. "You didn't look in it?"

"I held it up to the light," Axel admitted proudly, standing to inspect the mysterious envelope. "You gonna open it or what?"

"All right, all right," Riku murmured, tearing through the top with his thumb. He popped it open, found three slips of laminated paper inside, and pulled them out.

They both stared at the things displayed in Riku's hand. Axel choked.

"Holy _hell_," he rasped, yanking one of them away and cupping it gingerly. "These are tickets for that _Nobodies_ concert in a few weeks."

"I…" Riku stammered, shocked. The two tickets left in his hand innocently gleamed from the overhead light. "Did you…?"

"No way," Axel said quickly, shaking his head and raising his hands. "This wasn't me, I swear."

Riku's brow knitted as he slowly set the empty envelope down and fell into his chair. "But then who…"

Axel didn't seem to notice Riku's confusion. He was pacing around the dorm, brewing all sorts of plans and waving his arms wildly. Through Demyx's influence, he had begun to rather like _The Nobodies_. "Oh, man, Demyx is gonna _freak_ when he finds out. Three tickets total, right? That's _perfect_. You, me, and him can take a little road trip to the Riverfront for a day."

He stopped for a moment and looked over. Riku looked back, still a little lost.

"Well," Axel started again calmly, "unless… you don't want to. It was addressed to you, so they're your tickets. I mean, if there's someone else you'd rather take along…" he trailed off.

Riku gazed at the loosely held tickets again. He imagined being in a large, noisy crowd in the growing heat, surrounded by happy people and a screaming Demyx. He imagined himself sitting in his plastic seat, with whatever refreshment he chose, the odd guy out who didn't really care for the band.

He could give Axel the tickets and let him pick Demyx and someone else. Maybe Seifer or Yuffie. They'd probably like to go. Or maybe Riku could bring Leon and Cloud, just to hang out. Naminé wouldn't enjoy going to a loud place. Maybe Sora…

But Sora wouldn't like the music, he reasoned. Axel liked the music. Axel would stealthily force his way through the crowd and clear a little path. Axel would buy French fries in a cup and shake them around until Riku took one. Or two. Or three.

"No," Riku decided, "that sounds good. Let's do that."

Axel immediately grinned and rubbed his hands together, ticket between them. "All right! I'll call Demyx now. Watch, he'll squeal like a girl."

After some incoherent babbling on the other line, they found out that Demyx could indeed squeal like a girl.

* * *

One afternoon, Riku met Leon and Cloud at the new ice cream parlor. _The Sea-Salt_ was a growing statewide chain, popular for the original flavor it was named after. The parlor had an old fashion feel to it: cheery, pale colors; tall tables and chairs; workers with wide grins and uniforms, singing ice cream songs as they mixed the flavors right before their customers' eyes.

Riku had his delicious chocolate sundae, topped with a brilliant cherry. He poked his spoon around in the gooey treat. Across the round table Cloud licked his green sea-salt bar, while Leon tried to look stoic and dignified with his vanilla cone. He glared at the swirled white tip more than actually eating it; the cone seemed to melt from his mere gaze.

"Don't let it drip on your hand," Cloud advised, waving his sea-salt admonishingly.

Leon's gray eyes narrowed farther. He looked torn between the delicious food and his pride. Cloud was amused; it had taken a lot of persuasion to get the brunet to buy it.

Riku scooped some sundae up and ate it. "It's really good, Leon," he teased. "You'll regret not trying it."

Leon glanced over with a raised eyebrow. "Not with you two staring at me like that."

"Are we making you nervous?" Riku said, barely noticing that Cloud was looking at him oddly.

"No," Leon smartly countered, scowling at his cone again. He raised it closer to his mouth. It looked so cold and nice, compared to the changing temperature outside.

Cloud cut in then, his mouth in a thoughtful frown. "You've been really upbeat lately, Riku."

Riku's attention shifted to his friend, smile falling slightly. "What do you mean?"

The blond took another lick. "You're a little different, is all. Not a bad thing."

That was when Riku noticed how light his body felt, and how easy it had been to join in with Leon and Cloud's teasing. Usually he just let Cloud have at it, only deeming when it was time to stop.

The blond appeared to have lost interest, more concentrated on his food.

Out of the corner of his eye, Riku saw Leon take an experimental lick. The brunet's eyebrow rose in surprise.

"Oh," Riku whispered, looking down.

Things had been a lot of fun lately.

"Well, I'll be right back," Cloud suddenly declared, popping the last bit of sea-salt into his mouth and hopping off the chair. "Restroom time."

Leon waved as Cloud walked off. Riku scooped another bite.

Things quieted. He and Leon were never all that close; it was weird when they were alone. Neither of them really had anything to say to each other.

Leon was observant, though. He saw all sorts of things when people didn't think he was looking—like a few months back, how Riku sort of spaced out sadly, or how his grin wasn't as wide.

At least, not as wide as the little smile he wore now, poking at his sundae and eyes glazed in thought.

While watching him, Leon figured that Riku would end up just fine.

* * *

Axel carefully ran his tiny sponge brush across the egg, leaving a black streak. He was going for a zebra effect.

It was the Saturday night before Easter. He and Riku had come over for the band's usual Friday practice and ended up sleeping over. Most of _The Organization_ had left earlier that morning, but since Axel and Riku didn't have any plans for Easter, Demyx's mother had insisted they stayed. She had grown particularly fond of them, especially the soft-spoken Riku.

Axel, Riku, Demyx and Yuffie sat at the kitchen table. In the middle were cups of colored dye, along with a large bowl of readied eggs. They had decided to color eggs tonight, just because Axel and Riku were going home soon.

"Look, look, I made a happy face," Yuffie said, turning her yellow egg around. Two points of black and an uneven smile were on the front.

"That's very good, sweetheart," her father said from the living room, not really seeing.

"Mine's better," Demyx dully stated, staring at his splotchy egg. Though he was wonderful at playing guitars, his artistic ability was sadly lacking.

"Is not!" Yuffie retorted, sticking out her tongue and setting her egg to dry in the cardboard holder.

"Is _too_."

"Is _not_."

"It _is_!"

"Actually, Demyx," Axel interrupted, putting his zebra egg next to Yuffie's. "It kinda does suck."

Demyx stared at his egg more, in all its splotchy glory. "… Oh."

Riku, who was sitting next to Axel, laughed. "It's all right. Just try another."

"And what are _you_ making?" Axel asked, invading his roommate's space. "You've been on the same one since we started."

Riku smirked and turned it to face the redhead. Axel peered at it.

It was a little Axel-egg. His likeness was deformed to fit onto it, but the carefully placed red dye that composed the hair completely gave it away. Spots of green made up the eyes, and the mouth was curved into a feral grin.

"It was the first thing that came to mind," Riku explained quietly, turning it back to add on the last details.

Axel was grinning madly, much like his egg-twin. "First thing, huh?"

"Axel and Riku, sittin' in a tree…" Demyx crowed, leering. "K-I-S-S—"

Riku directed his best scowl at him, although his face was turning pink. Demyx quivered and tried to hide under the table while Yuffie showed off her latest creation. Axel only sat, smug, and painted another egg.

He noted for the hundredth time that Riku's blush was cute, and also that it was an _Axel_-egg—not a Sora-egg, or a Demyx-egg, or an Aladdin-egg, but an _Axel_. He guessed it was a little selfish wanting to be the first thing on Riku's mind so much, but _damn_, it felt good to hear that. It felt good to hear that Riku wanted to be around _him_, and not someone else, like Sora.

It wasn't that Axel disliked Sora. He was sure the kid was a nice person, if a little oblivious. Then again, he hadn't even met him, so he couldn't say.

He didn't like how downcast Riku looked after talking to Sora on the phone, though. And it was _Axel_ who took him out afterward and made him feel better.

Glancing over to see him tediously adding detail to his egg, the redhead thought Riku might finally be getting it.

From under the table, they heard the rhyme continued: "—I-N-G!"

Also, Demyx couldn't sing. Axel kicked under the table until he heard a yelp.

* * *

On the day of the concert, they carpooled in Riku's luxury vehicle and drove to the Riverfront. It was about an hour away, deep in the main division of Traverse but offset from the bustling business district. Located near the river, the concert area was a colossal, open stadium, subject to weather and entirely free to be as loud as possible.

Demyx entered the car with a CD case, demanding that they listen to it on the way there. He sat in the back, Axel in shotgun, and passed the CD up to be played.

Of course, Axel noticed, the kid was barely containing his excitement. Demyx wriggled in his seat and wouldn't stop beaming, exclaiming, "_Oh_, this is one of my _favorites_," whenever a song seeped through the speakers.

Demyx had a lot of favorites.

Other exclamations were: "Play it again, play it again!" "I _love_ Marluxia's guitar solo!" "You hear the violin, Riku? That's Saïx; he plays all the odd instruments in the band—he's really good at it—" "Yuffie was _so_ jealous! She really wanted to see Xemnas sing, but I told her _no_, we only have three tickets—" and finally, when they saw the Riverfront appear faraway: "Oh my _God_, I'm actually going to see them in concert! _Oh my God_!"

Not to say that the other two weren't excited. Axel was, definitely; he was just more laid back about it. Concerts were fun places to be. Riku was just content to be around friends, even if he had to keep telling Demyx to sit down in the moving car.

By the time they got there, the parking lot was full. Cars were spilling out onto street sides, and people were strolling along the sidewalks in groups. The sun was already lowering, so the air was cool; Riku shrugged on his vest and Axel shimmied into his hoodie. Demyx was already running down the street from their parking spot, waving and ordering that they hurry up.

"He's so ecstatic," Riku said as he locked his car and pocketed the keys.

Axel looked at him from across the hood. "Can you blame him? This is practically the kid's dream."

"I guess not," Riku said, chuckling. "Let's go. We're a little late."

"Only an hour away, huh?"

"It's been a while since I've driven here."

"Ya-huh, sure."

* * *

The opening act was a band on the rise. They had a hit single and were good at tiding the audience over, but honestly, people were glad when they were done. _The Nobodies_ was what they came for.

Demyx, Axel and Riku found their seats, which were all metal and connected in rows. The stadium was packed, so they made sure to stick close. There was a short break before _The Nobodies_ would come on stage, so the overhead lamps were lit while people meandered for food and refreshments. The night air was cool and full of talk. A few girls in the row in front of them were chattering like squirrels.

Riku's soda sat in its holder, and Demyx quickly chewed on his hot dog. Axel sat between them, casually leaning back with his hands behind his head. They were in the middle section; far away but still close enough to see shadowed figures switching instruments around on the stage.

The lights flickered and dimmed. Some girls screamed gleefully, and Demyx froze mid-bite.

Everything was dark. Riku glanced to his right, where Axel was, and could barely make out his face by the moon's glow.

Then, the keen, high hum of a violin pierced the air, and everyone's talk exploded into hollers and clapping and screaming. Someone chortled over the stadium-wide speakers and said, "This group's excitable."

A fast drumbeat and one cymbal crash followed. "All the more fun, eh?"

Demyx looked like he was about to have a heart attack. Another girl screamed about her love for Xemnas.

"I think you have some admirers, Xem," a third, lilting voice sneered as guitar strings were plucked.

"Hmm." This voice was low and smooth, and the microphone was tapped. "I believe it is time to begin, then."

The stage was flooded with colored lights. Axel was grinning dangerously at everyone around him, and Demyx bolted up so fast that he reeled.

_The Nobodies_ were revealed: Xemnas at the front, main vocal and second guitarist; Marluxia to the side as the lead guitarist; Xigbar on the drums in the back; and Saïx to Xemnas's other side, backup vocal with his violin poised at his shoulder. The spinning lights poured down on each of them. People were wild, whistling, clapping, and yelling. Xemnas raised his hand and Saïx, flicking some blue hair out of his face, set his bow to the violin's neck.

The speakers ended up louder than the crowd. Apparently they were prepared for chaos.

Saïx closed his eyes and burst into a fast-paced score. Marluxia stepped forward, shaggy hair a deep, dull pink, and furiously strummed at his electric guitar. Xigbar joined in with a heavy beat—the drummer was already banging his head, the eldest yet wildest of the band, streaked black hair coming loose from its ponytail. Xemnas held the microphone roughly with two hands, silver bangs hanging in his face, and breathed out lyrics.

Riku remained seated, even when the woman next to him screamed in his ear. Demyx continued being hysterical, while Axel stood up and cackled at him.

Watching _The Nobodies_, Riku figured out why Demyx loved them so much. They played for the same reason he did.

When they were immersed in music, they were alive.

People were jumping up and down; Riku thought he could feel the concrete shake under his feet. Some were swaying, others were dancing, and the band on the stage was playing with all the energy and strength they had. They'd play all night if they could; hitting the drums, mouth right at the microphone, head hung and intent on guitar strings, eyes closed and letting the music flow.

It was rhythmic, punctuated by a strong violin, and Xemnas's voice was confident and directed to the audience, sung from deep in his stomach. From song to song, they continued with the same enthusiasm, even during slower, sadder ones. Demyx knew them all, his arms waving sporadically. His throat would be sore the next day from belting out the words.

Axel's would, too. He wasn't as crazy, but he knew some of the songs, and everyone was having fun. He couldn't just _sit_ and not dance.

Riku was, once again, surrounded by smiling people. He tried his best not to get in the way.

Axel looked down at his roommate, who was admiring the performance from his seat. This would not do, he decided, and grabbed Riku's arm.

Riku shot his eyes up to him, frowning as his arm was yanked on. Axel ordered for him to stand up, but his voice was lost to the overwhelming sound. Riku slowly shook his head, not understanding. The redhead rolled his eyes, leaned down right next to Riku's ear, and said, "C'mon. Stand and sing with me."

Riku shirked back, raising an eyebrow, and loudly replied, "I don't know the words."

Axel's grin was almost predatory. His grip didn't loosen. "You think that matters?"

It was hard hearing him, but Riku knew from Axel's determined green eyes. Sighing, he allowed himself to be pulled up, staggering only a little with Axel slung an arm over his and Demyx's shoulders. Demyx protested with a bark of giddy laughter, in the middle of a chorus.

For a while all Riku did was stand. He tried to shrug off Axel's arm, but this time it stayed. He was pulled in close and Axel swayed, his face near and singing. Riku kept his eyes trained on the ground, trying not to smile as his roommate attempted to raise his chin.

After a purposely-bad music note from Axel, Riku looked at him and his face broke, laughing out loud.

Because this was what it was about. It was about playing loud and hard and dancing with an arm around your shoulder. It was about huddling together and singing out of tune to lyrics you didn't really know. It was smiling in large crowds, as wide as anyone else, and meaning it. It was becoming breathless and closing your eyes, hearing the noise, feeling the person next to you, and realizing that, right then, you were happy.

Mouth in an open smile, Riku caught Axel's gaze.

He hadn't noticed before, how green those eyes really were.

* * *

A few days after the concert, and after his hearing returned, Riku stood on Ansem's doorstep and waited for him to answer the knock. They had driven home tired and spent, completely knocked out the next day. Demyx still hadn't stopped talking about it.

Riku's backpack sat on the ground as he waited patiently. He just had a few questions to ask, and then he'd be on his way. No staying and glaring at Ansem's inattentive expression.

The door was opened, and there was Ansem looking down at him, disinterested as usual.

"Hey," Riku muttered, picking up his books. "I just need a little help today, and I'll be gone."

Ansem's eyes passed over the backpack, and then returned to Riku's face. "You seem tired."

"A little," Riku said, not expanding upon it.

Ansem let him step inside, closing the door. As Riku was walking down the hall and away from him, he asked flatly: "Enjoyed your concert, did you?"

Riku paused. He hadn't said anything about going to it. "… Yeah," he replied, "I did."

"Hmm," Ansem said, breezing past the younger man without another word. He disappeared into the usual room.

Riku stared after him.

His name written on the envelope had been so neat and perfect.

For a man of science, Ansem could be pretty confusing. But Riku guessed that was all right.

Ansem was Ansem, after all.

* * *

It was a rainy night. Axel squinted, standing at the window, but all he could make out were vague shapes and the sheet of rain. He could hear it, slightly muffled, from inside the dorm, the constant splatter and splash against building and asphalt. Little rivulets ran down the foggy windowpane.

Axel craned his head back to look at Riku sitting on his bed. The latter had his sketchbook out again, propped up on his lap. He erased some part viciously with an irritated frown, rubbed the back of his neck, and continued sketching.

The rain filled the silence. It made Axel feel sluggish and restless at the same time.

Riku erased another part, this time letting out an annoyed groan.

Axel closed the blinds, opting to study the frustrated artist instead. "Problems?"

Riku ran some fingers through his hair, sighing. "It's nothing. I just… have trouble drawing hands sometimes."

Axel walked over and sat on the bed's edge, next to Riku. He leaned back to catch a glimpse of the page. "Looks okay to me."

"No, they aren't right," Riku claimed, shaking his head and glowering at the sketch.

Axel thought a lot of things right then. He thought about how nice Riku's hair looked, how it hung in his face and fell around his shoulders. He thought about Riku's narrowed eyes and how they had been so open and brilliant at the concert. He even thought about Riku's toes, because they were bare and curled and he kind of wanted to wiggle them around for the hell of it.

"Lemme see your hand," Axel said, completely straight-faced. He turned to his friend, crossing his legs and sitting fully on the bed.

"Why?" Riku was quick to ask, slightly taken back. He regarded Axel curiously.

Axel rolled his eyes. "Just let me see it."

"You're not going to do anything to it, are you?"

"_Nooo_," Axel drew out, exasperated. "Come on, I promise."

Riku still seemed unsure, but he set aside his book and pencil anyway. He held out his hand, palm up, and Axel took it into both of his. The redhead pulled it closer and with it came Riku, who had to catch himself from falling forward. Riku was about to comment on this accordingly, but the words died in his throat.

He could feel Axel's thumb tracing his palm lines. The redhead was intent on the hand he held, peering at it closely and paying no mind to Riku's questioning eyes.

The thumb traveled along, nail skimming the flesh, while Axel's fingers worked across the knuckles. Each of Riku's fingers were separated and inspected, touched from the skin between them to the tips until they were interlaced with another's. It was a strange contrast, Riku's pale to Axel's light peach—strange how the palms meshed against each other and the fingers loosely locked. The fleeting touches, short nails along faint veins, so much contact on such a small span of skin—Riku couldn't help but numbly stare.

It kept raining, with little splashes and splatters.

Riku remembered that he needed to breathe. "What… what are you doing?"

The question was almost quiet enough to be lost.

Axel's eyes rose, finding his from across laced hands. He smiled, solemn and serious. "I'm studying your hand. They don't seem all that hard."

Suddenly the tiny space between their palms felt hot. Axel wasn't letting go, and Riku couldn't bring himself to move.

"They are," Riku softly replied, tearing his eyes away and nervously licking his lips. "To draw. Hard to draw, I mean."

The grip tightened. Riku felt the pads of Axel's fingers rubbing the back of his hand. The rain seemed obnoxiously loud.

"I think," Axel began, tilting his head, "that you draw them just fine."

"… Maybe," Riku said, but it came out more as a choke, and he swallowed.

"A little more practice, then."

And it was gone, just like that. Axel's hand slipped away, and so did he. Riku stared at the empty space.

"Well, time for bed," Axel said lightly, grinning from the bathroom door. "Early class tomorrow."

There was a pause before Riku murmured, "Yeah." His head was lowered, hand close to his stomach. His gaze flittered to the sketchbook and back.

Sleep didn't come easily.

**-April, end**


	9. May

**Author's Notes:** Firstly, thanks so much again for the support. Gosh, I'm so squee-happy with how everyone has received the fic. Especially with what was such a crack pairing when I started.

Secondly, this month is pretty much the climax of "Good Enough". Meaning, things will start winding down. The last three chapters will be relatively short. ; ;

Lastly, I really, really hope I've met everyone's expectations. Some scenes were insanely hard to get written. I'm nervous. D: But enough of that. Don't maul me, please?

So now we have May, in which life just _is_.

We also finally get what we all want.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter nine- May**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

The casual touches weren't feeling so casual anymore.

At first it was sort of unbelievable. Axel was just trying to be friendly; he was only joking or teasing. The way he looked at Riku meant absolutely nothing—there was nothing underneath the surface, nothing to understand, and when Axel placed a hand on the small of Riku's back, it certainly didn't want to move lower.

But the more Riku thought about it, the more likely it became. He caught himself wondering that maybe Axel _was_ hinting at something with his grin, or maybe his hand didn't _want_ to move from Riku's shoulder, or when Axel said an offhanded compliment, maybe he actually _meant_ it.

Sometimes Riku would stand before the mirror, examining whatever feature Axel had found so appealing that day.

Then Riku began noticing things that had always been there, but previously held little significance. Things like how lengthy Axel's stride was, or how close he stood, or how he gasped when he laughed too hard. Little things like how his expression was so open and free, how dramatic his movements could be, and how warm his hands were on Riku's skin.

There were other traits, like how narrow Axel's face was, how strange his hair appeared, and how he stood taller by an inch—tiny details that Riku hadn't cared for, but somehow didn't bother him anymore. Now, Axel was just Axel in every sense of the word—face, hair, height and all.

The atmosphere turned tense and different. It was hard being alone with Axel, because Riku felt every touch, heard every word, and saw every look. He didn't know what might happen. He didn't know if he even wanted it to happen.

He really didn't know all that much.

* * *

"You seem distracted."

Riku froze, hand poised over a sketchpad. The pencil was drooping in his grip. He sat in Storyboarding, working on the last project of the class, while Naminé tilted her head. Her light blue eyes were thoughtful.

"A little," he admitted, setting his pencil down. A few rough outlines had been mindlessly drawn in.

Naminé only nodded, motioning to his project. She knew he wouldn't elaborate. "Your storyboard looks nice. Have you been practicing?"

Riku sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah, I have. It helps."

"That's good," she said simply, returning to her booklet and writing dialogue. She didn't add more, so Riku tried to concentrate on his work.

His mind kept wandering. He was looking down at the page, but didn't really see it. His pencil moved along the paper, but without an actual purpose. He could hear the conversations from other students, but he didn't process the words.

Naminé's voice, though, was gentle and clear:

"You should do what makes you happy."

"Huh?" he said, shaking his head and glancing at her. Everything came into focus again.

Naminé's blond hair was obscuring her face. She didn't turn to him; just quietly spoke as a pastel glided across the page. "I know I always try to make you decide on an art major. I think you'd like it. But—" She paused here. "—you should do what makes you happy."

Riku looked back at his project, and at the pencil in his hand. His eyes roamed over the sloppily drawn figures in each panel. He thought about all the quick sketches in his book, staying up late to ink the lines, and the good feeling he got when Axel complimented them.

"Actually," he began, "I've been looking into the animation major."

A brief surprise flew across Naminé's features as her head shot up, eyes wide and blinking. Then, she just smiled her smile.

Things were finally beginning to fall into place.

* * *

Finals were coming in a week. Between studying, registering for the next semester, and the excitement of summer vacation, the campus became a little hectic. Students discussed vacation plans and professors crammed in that last bit of knowledge.

At Demyx's house, the parental units were fawning over Yuffie. She was graduating from high school in a few days—her father beamed, detailing how proud he was, while her mother was on the verge of crying. Their baby birds were leaving the nest, she said.

After a long Friday practice, _The Organization_ spent the night again. As usual, they occupied the basement with sleeping bags, which Demyx's mother had long since learned to always supply. Yuffie was allowed the couch, partly because Luxord claimed they were gentlemen and partly because her father demanded it.

The sleeping bags were placed haphazardly wherever they found room. The basement was spacious enough to allow six men to fully stretch out, although a limb would occasionally flop over and wake someone up.

Everyone wore their day clothes to sleep while shoes were deposited at the staircase. They'd wake up rumpled and stiff the next day, and then they'd drive home unkempt and drowsy.

Riku lay on his side, hands resting near his face. Axel was lying parallel next to him, about an arm's length away. Somewhere near the redhead's feet, Riku thought he could see Demyx's hair.

The lights were turned off. It was quiet, save for the outside noise of crickets and cars. Water surged through pipes as the house creaked. Someone grumbled and shifted around, but Riku couldn't see whom.

Demyx's unsure voice suddenly cracked the silence. "Is anyone awake?"

A chorus of other voices followed: "Yup." "Ugh." "I am now." "What the _hell_ do you want?" That last one was definitely a groggy Seifer.

"I have a question," Demyx explained to the dark. "It's keeping me awake."

Riku saw Axel turn onto his back and speak. "Shoot."

There was a sniff before an answer.

"Do you think we'll ever make it?"

Somewhere in the mass of bags, Luxord played with his goatee. "What do you mean?"

"Us," Demyx clarified, sitting up. "The band. We practice all the time, and that's great, right? And we always talk about making it big and doing more, but we never do."

An awkward silence passed by.

Demyx looked at all the people around him. "I mean, if we're ever gonna make it, we gotta do more, right? We can't always just sit down here and play, or else we'll just keep doing that forever, or we'll break up and never get to do anything big—"

"You're rambling," Zexion pointed out dully.

"But I'm _right_, aren't I?" Demyx pressed, frowning.

"Well, you know," Axel interjected carefully when no one else wanted to, "it's not all that easy to get your name out there. You can't exactly snap your fingers and get a record deal."

"But we're not even _trying_ to do anything," Demyx said firmly, crossing his arms. No one else sat up. "We've been together for almost a year. We have a few of our own songs. Why can't we just go out and perform?"

"You expect us to set up on a street corner or something?" Seifer bit out.

Riku watched from his sleeping place as the boy's face fell. Seifer's opinion always got to him the most.

"Well, no," he responded, less adamant than before. "But we could do more."

"Maybe Demyx is right," Yuffie said from the couch. "We'll have all summer to try."

Seifer snorted. Demyx smiled brightly at his sister.

"I know a few guys in the business district," Luxord supplied casually. "I could talk to them about a gig somewhere."

Demyx's face lit up. "That'd be great! Oh, _wow_, an actual stage—"

"Yeah, it'd be cool," Axel agreed lazily, moving onto his side to face his roommate. "But make sure to tell us when and where, 'cause Riku and I gotta see. Right, Riku?"

Riku was caught off-guard. He hadn't thought anyone would include him in the conversation. "Uh, yeah. Of course."

"Great, we'll have a party," Zexion deadpanned. "Can we sleep now?"

Demyx seemed satisfied. He snuggled down into his bag, blankets pulled up to nose. "Okay. But we gotta do that, promise?"

"Fine, whatever, we will," Seifer mumbled.

There was a happy little sigh. "Thanks, guys. G'night."

The chorus of voices followed again: "Night." "Sure." "Yeah, yeah." "Mm."

Quiet settled in once more, so Riku closed his eyes and tried to sleep. After a while, his breathing evened out, the sounds around him dimmed down, and his brain began to cross the fuzzy line between consciousness and dreaming.

A faint tickle on his hand brought him back. His eyes didn't want to open—they were stubbornly weighed down. He almost drifted off again, but this time something skimmed along his arm. Riku replied with annoyed groan. Luxord's light snoring invaded his head, and with it came all the other nightly noises.

He forced his eyes to open; the lids quivered shut before finally lifting.

Axel was smiling at him.

It took a bit for Riku to understand this. Blessed sleep clung to the edges of his mind. Everything felt slowed and dulled.

But he managed to notice that Axel's hand was holding his. Riku's only lay there, unresponsive. The redhead's quiet smile faltered at the corners.

It was the same thing that had sent his mind reeling before. Tired aqua eyes stared at it.

Axel's fingers squeezed around his.

Axel was smiling.

Axel was there.

Axel was _always_ there.

Axel made him laugh; Axel took him places; Axel knew him from the inside out, knew when to talk and when to not; Axel complimented his art; Axel complimented _him_, made him stand before the mirror and maybe think the same thing; Axel did this and that and everything in-between—it was all _Axel_.

_You should do what makes you happy._

Right before falling asleep, Riku squeezed back.

* * *

The next few days couldn't be described as anything but softer.

Instead of nervously glancing away from Axel's flirting attempts, Riku smirked and returned with one of his own. It lacked the bite their normal competitions did—the words were a little gentler and the eyes a little brighter. Axel was a master, though; he usually succeeded in making Riku blush and glare.

Axel became bolder in his attempts. It was obvious that there was something between them, even though it all had a mask of playfulness—good friends flirting just for the fun of it.

It was most apparent when they were alone. Short silences, brushes of skin-to-skin, wary smiles—everything was softer then, making sure that this was the right path, that this was what each other wanted.

But it was never brought up directly. The idea was danced around, the possibility of _more_ than flirting, but an invisible wall blocked it. It was a line that, once crossed, couldn't be taken back.

There was never a right moment. When they tried, it became awkward, and one of them would end up laughing it off as nothing.

Even then, the days passed by.

* * *

Finals came and went. Everyone was getting ready to go home, however far it may be. Some would stay for a couple more days, gathering their things and hanging with friends before summer tore them apart.

Leon and Cloud were graduating. The ceremony would take place within a week, near May's end. Afterward, Leon would attend an internship in another city, while Cloud returned to their hometown to think things through.

Leon, Cloud and Riku sat on the living room carpet of the older men's apartment. The television was off, but the kitchen light was on for late night snacking. They sat in a triangle, facing each other, with cards in their hands. Each of their decks was varying in size—a good game of War that never ended.

They each dished out a card. Riku's eight beat Cloud's four, but Leon's queen won it. The brunet took the three cards and added them to his stack.

"We'll drive back together," Cloud explained as three more cards were sacrificed. "Leon's going to visit his parents and Aerith before heading out. I think I'll stay with Tifa. She said I could."

"What about after that?" Riku asked as his jack of diamonds conquered the other two. He gathered the cards to himself.

"I don't really know," Cloud said flippantly. "I guess I'll find some quick job till I do."

Leon won the next round. Cloud's deck was becoming pitifully small.

"You coming back here next semester?" the blond said, shelling out an ace. He smirked victoriously and took his win: a queen and a five.

"Yeah," Riku answered, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. "I'm staying here."

"Maybe I can come and visit. Leon, too," Cloud offered, staring at his pile.

His hometown was far away, and Leon would be even farther. It was unlikely they'd travel that distance. But it was a nice thought.

"All right," Riku said quietly.

The conversation died. The same pattern of flipping out cards and the winner taking them in continued.

Eventually, Cloud was the one to speak again: "This is the last time we may see each other like this."

That was when they finally looked up. They looked at one and then at the other: Leon saw his old friend and a pleasant acquaintance, while Cloud saw his high school buddy and a good companion.

When Riku looked up, he saw Cloud and Leon, two people he had grown accustomed to having around. He saw them and noticed their familiarity—the same messy brown strands, the same spiky blond hair, the same gray and blue eyes. Leon was impassive, merely glancing back to the cards. Cloud was pensive, staring at something in a room beyond their triangle.

And then Riku knew he would miss them.

Leon cleared his throat. "… We'll call."

Cloud snapped out of his daze. "Yeah. We can call."

"All right," Riku said, gazing at his deck. "Sounds good."

Leon and Cloud were leaving.

That meant Axel was, too.

* * *

It was the last night they'd be in the dorm. Clothes and trinkets were packed in suitcases and boxes littered the floor. The furniture and walls were barren. Only a few things were left out, like their laptops and an outfit, which would be put away or worn upon returning home.

They'd leave in the afternoon.

When they had packed, they helped each other—"Don't forget this," they said, and there was a short pause where their eyes met. The object was passed over and stuck into a box, and then they went back to their sides of the dorm. They shuffled past and around each other, and every time they came close, Riku would stiffen, expecting something to happen.

Axel wasn't good at this. He'd take a short break from packing to sit in his chair. Every time he opened his mouth he wanted to say something important, but it never came out. He didn't want to mess up.

When they were done, Axel disjointedly excused himself and stepped outside. Riku sat on his bed with his sketchbook and flipped through the pages. Drawings of the redhead stood out the most, their penciled faces expressive and animate.

Everything was ready. Soon they'd fall asleep, wake up, and go.

When Axel opened the door again, his face was resolute. "Grab your jacket."

Riku looked up with quiet surprise. "Why?"

Axel gave an easy grin as he slipped on his hoodie. "I'm taking you out of here. C'mon."

Riku didn't really want to fall asleep. He felt tired, but sleep passed too much time. Standing, he retrieved his white and yellow vest and tugged it on. "Where are we going?"

Axel shrugged, grabbed his keys, and moved to his bed. The comforter was yanked off fluidly and rolled into a bundle. "We'll find out when we get there."

Riku looked at him with a raised eyebrow. "What are you doing?"

"Taking you out of here," Axel repeated, the bundle under his arm. "Now stop asking me Twenty Questions, okay?"

Riku shook his head, but followed anyway.

* * *

Axel only had a vague idea of what he was doing. He sort of knew what type of place he wanted to end up at, but as for how to get there, he was entirely guessing. Every turn was a whim. He might be going in circles, but if he was, Riku didn't seem to mind.

Axel's clunky white jeep chugged along. Light from the lampposts overhead streamed across them, shadows shifting in a continuous pattern.

There was no talking. That happened a lot lately.

He could see part of Riku's face in the side view mirror. Every time he checked to turn right, he saw that face.

Riku watched everything pass by outside the window. The only sound was the hypnotic static of wheels against pavement. Axel wondered if the other had that same distant look from before.

He just wanted to take Riku out. Somewhere. Anywhere. Didn't matter too much.

Left looked good. He flipped the blinker on.

"Are you lost?"

Axel looked over at Riku's voice. The latter's head was turned to him, but not fully. "Yeah, pretty much. Why?"

Riku turned fully at that. "You really don't know where we are?"

"Nnn…" Axel paused. "No."

Riku stared incredulously. "And you're not bothered by that."

"Nope."

"… You're weird."

He called him that a lot. Axel chuckled. "I know."

It made him remember stuff, like being called weird and a dork, or Riku making fun of his hair, or Demyx making fun of _them_—just all these little snapshots of people and places he had met and seen in the past months. He remembered stupid stuff like what Riku had worn one day, and things that made him laugh, and some things that made him sad, or nostalgic, or any other emotion.

The last two semesters had gone by so quick. They were actually over.

"Hey," Axel said, a one-sided smile forming. "Remember when Demyx laughed so hard, he squirted milk out of his nose?"

Riku smirked. "Yeah, he complained about the burning for a long time."

"And his eyes got all watery." Axel laughed. "Man, that was awesome."

"I remember when you tripped down the stairs."

It hadn't been funny then, but it was now.

Axel shot a glare. "I did _not_ trip. I _stumbled_ gracefully."

Riku smirked wider. "You call pin-wheeling your arms graceful?"

"It's like a dance. Yanno, one of those classical things."

The silence broke into easy laughs and wistful voices. There was a lot to remember.

The scenery passed around them and disappeared down the street, but there was still more road ahead to travel on. They didn't quite know where they were going or where they'd end up, but they went anyway. Maybe they'd get lost and have trouble finding their way back, but at least they could laugh about it later.

There were no complications or second guesses; just Axel and Riku and all that had been.

It was just that simple.

* * *

After noticing a sign directing to the city park, Axel followed it. It would prove all right, for what he had in mind.

The jeep was parked along a curb, and Axel pulled the blanket out from the backseat. They walked onto the grass and under the trees—the air smelled clean, and the night bugs were singing.

It was late, so the park was empty. Axel found a spot where the sky was open and visible and fanned the blanket out. Riku observed him with crossed arms and an amused smile.

Once the comforter was smoothed out, Axel crawled onto it and flopped down. Even through the cloth, he could still feel the prickly grass; it crunched under his weight.

Lying on his back with his legs and arms spread out, he lifted his head. "You waiting for an invitation or something?"

"Whatever happened to benches?" Riku asked, walking to the other side and sitting down.

"Think of it like a picnic," Axel suggested, folding his hands behind his head. They became lost in the red spikes. "But without the food."

Riku brushed his long bangs aside. Scooting down on the blanket, he mirrored Axel's position and faced the sky.

The stars were out. He hadn't honestly noticed them before.

Axel's left arm, the one next to Riku, straightened and pointed up. His face turned, but his eyes remained on the dark sky. "Look," he said.

Riku laid his hands on his stomach and then scooted over so that he was beneath the pointing finger. "What about it?"

"These," Axel said, poking at each star in question. "They make up a dog."

Riku's eyes followed each star, connecting them together and separating them from the rest. They twinkled dimly. "… I think it looks like a duck."

Axel glanced at him with a puckered brow. Their faces seemed awfully close. "It's obviously a dog," he argued, reverting his attention to the constellation and outlining it with his finger again. "See the tail?"

"That's the duckbill."

"I'm telling you, it's a dog."

"Duck."

"_Dog_."

Riku pondered while his eyes narrowed. "… It looks most like a mouse, though."

They both tilted their heads.

"Hey," Axel murmured, "you're right."

Riku chortled, but didn't say more.

Then they just stared up.

The stars were scattered in little clusters, white and blue, small and big. The sky was black, but it lightened at the horizon, and the moon shone. It gave everything a strange blue tint—from the grass to the trees to the blanket. It made the yellow in Axel's skin stand out, and Riku's silver hair shimmer.

There was a crisp breeze, and the crickets chirped. The air felt easy to breathe.

Riku hadn't moved his head away. It was still next to the redhead's shoulder, and when Axel lowered his arm, they mashed together.

It was peaceful.

"Yanno," Axel whispered, "it's not so bad here."

Riku's eyes tore away from the stars to look at his roommate. Silver bangs hung in his face, but between them, the aquamarine hue was undeniable.

Axel didn't meet his gaze. His smile was small, but there. "I remember you," he said softly, "a few months back. You said you were restless here. That you wanted to get out."

All these mute images kept playing in his head. He saw Riku and his distant eyes, and then his open-mouthed laugh, but there was no sound. Riku would look away and blush and mouth something. Then he'd be looking over his shoulder, motioning to hurry up—and then Axel would see his ceiling while he listened to Riku wordlessly talk, and he'd hang his arm over the bedside and swing it and imagine how Riku looked while sleeping.

Axel turned his head, and he saw Riku lying next to him. Something made sense right then, but he wasn't quite sure what.

"It's not so bad here." His voice wouldn't go above a whisper. He could see all the individual silver strands, how they fell across Riku's face and pooled onto the blanket, and the varying shades of aqua in those eyes. "You've got a lot of good stuff going on. Maybe if you looked around a little, you'd see that, too."

Riku's mouth parted, but nothing came out.

Axel's smile quirked at one corner. His eyes weren't as sharp as normal.

His hand, the one closest, rose. The back of it brushed along Riku's cheek, feeling the tiny peach fuzz, knuckles skimming the jaw and down across the chin. Riku's eyes flickered between the hand and the redhead's face.

Axel nodded to the touch; his question was soft. "Is this okay?"

Riku breathed in deep. His mind felt cloudy. "Yeah," he said, "it's okay."

When Axel moved next, it was awkward; the grass crunched and the blanket wrinkled. He pushed himself up and twisted his upper body over—his hip dug into the ground unpleasantly, and it was hard supporting his weight on bent arms.

Riku's view of the night sky was blocked.

Axel was heavy, despite his wiry frame. Every time Riku breathed, his chest pushed against the other's. He had to make an effort to keep going.

Axel was watching him now, above him. His red hair was mussed in the back from lying down, and shadows played across his face. "You sure?"

"I'm—" Riku paused. Axel's head was tilted, green eyes roaming, and his arms encased Riku in. "I'm sure."

Axel smiled; and then, slowly, they kissed.

It was nothing special. In fact, it was pretty clumsy. Once or twice their noses bumped; Axel would part and chuckle, and Riku would feel the little puff of air on his lips. Then Axel would try and change the angle when Riku wasn't ready, and their teeth ended up lightly clacking. He'd part once more and murmur an apology, then try again, and every time, it got a little more sure and comfortable.

A pattern was set—mouths opening and closing at an angle, Axel's hand brushing Riku's bangs aside. They had to swallow whenever saliva built up, and one of Axel's legs became tangled in Riku's. There wasn't even a specific taste: it was just hot and a little wet.

They worried about whether or not they were doing it right. The kiss was strange, sloppy, and tentative. It didn't make them weak in the knees, and they didn't get their heads in the clouds—there was no overwhelming feeling of elation.

But it was certainly good enough.

Axel hovered above with gulping breaths. After staring at each other, Riku grinned nervously and said, "I don't know what to do with my hands."

Axel's customary smirk found its place. His eyes were bright. "Try putting them around me, maybe?"

Riku hummed and clutched at Axel's back. "Maybe."

"See? Wasn't so hard."

Riku tilted his head back to laugh. Axel's eyebrows rose and he directed his attention to the bobbing Adam's apple, nipping down the neck—Riku laughed again, and Axel muttered something about him admitting he was ticklish.

The red spikes kept poking under Riku's chin, but at least he could see the sky. "It's late," he said, mouth in a half-smile.

Axel stopped at the collarbone, where the zipper had been pulled down. He inhaled the scent of grass, skin, and laundry. The fingers on his back ran across his shoulder blades. "Tired?" he asked.

"A little," Riku said absently. He looked from star to star.

Axel laid his head on Riku's shoulder, hands gliding down his sides. "We could sleep in the backseat," he said. "There should be room. If not, I can lean against the window."

Riku's eyes slipped closed. "Okay."

But even then, for a long time, they didn't move.

* * *

When Axel woke up, he realized that his left leg was tingly.

He didn't register _why_ it was tingly. He was more concerned about the sunlight shining right on his face, and how his cheek felt imprinted by the blanket that doubled as a pillow. True to his word, he had leaned against the car window and let Riku lie down.

Looking at his leg, he saw a silver-haired head propped up on it, and then he understood the _why_.

Riku lay on his back, legs scrunched up at the other end. His hair and clothes were in disarray from sleep; the white vest was used as a blanket over his chest and arms, and his sneakers were in a heap on the floor. He was wedged into the seat cushions, as far from the edge as possible.

Axel's leg was turning numb, but he figured he'd deal with it later. He attempted to brush some of Riku's hair away from his face.

He didn't know what time it was; his watch had been left behind. He knew that it was day, and that they'd eventually go home. A nagging little _something_ said not to, but he knew he would anyway.

After a while, he tried to reposition his leg without waking Riku up, but proved unsuccessful.

"Mm…"

Axel looked down and saw aqua eyes squinting up at him. "Sorry. Kinda losing feeling, yanno?"

Riku made another incoherent sound.

"Whatever happened to the early riser?" Axel jeered.

Riku mumbled and managed to say, "His roommate dragged him out all night and made him sleep in the backseat of a jeep."

"Well that's just sheer cruelty."

He answered with a yawn, and then dragged himself to sit up, the jacket falling to his lap. "What time is it?"

"Dunno," Axel said, rolling his foot around to wake it. It tingled all the way up and down. "I guess around noon."

"Oh."

Riku leaned against the seat, staring at the jeep's ceiling. He noticed the hole in the black fabric, while Axel had taken to smacking his leg.

They had planned to leave in a few hours. They wouldn't come back till late August.

"I don't want to go."

Axel stopped abusing his thigh and looked over. Riku's voice was still sleepy and quiet. "Yeah," he said easily, "I know."

But they had homes, family, and old friends to tend to. Prior obligations too concrete and precious to replace for something they weren't even sure where it was headed.

Axel admitted it—he missed his home. He always did. Still, he wanted to stay, and if he could have both his home and Riku at the same time, that'd be perfect. But it was too much for either of them to ask, just yet.

"We'll be back before we know it," he murmured.

Riku didn't seem convinced. "I guess." He didn't have quite as much to go home to, after all.

"Besides…" Axel continued, curling his toes. The feeling in them was returning. "We both have a lot to think about. Maybe the summer will give us the time we need."

Riku kept staring at the ceiling. Some part of the fabric appeared to be peeling off in a corner. "Like what?" he asked.

"I dunno. Stuff like Sora, maybe."

Riku visibly tensed. Things previously forgotten rushed through his mind.

Axel smiled sadly. "Exactly my point."

After a sigh, Riku relaxed into the seat again. "… Sorry."

Axel shrugged. He had expected it. "Eh, it'll work out somehow."

There was a familiar silence, where they could hear each other breathe. Axel licked his lips and cleared his throat. He wondered how often Sora would be around Riku, and was distinctly reminded that they still had separate lives.

"Hey," he said, "let's make a deal."

Riku raised his head from the seat and looked at him. "What?"

"Let's try not to talk to each other until we're back on campus."

A hurt look flashed across his face before it disappeared. "What do you mean?"

Axel slung a reassuring arm around his roommate's shoulders. "It's easier to think when your certain someone isn't around, that's all." He glanced away briefly. "Trust me. I should know."

_Roxas._

"I want you to make sure," he said softly. "And I gotta see something myself. By August, if it's still okay, then… we can try this. Deal?"

Riku nodded slowly, his mind elsewhere. "Deal."

Axel took a deep breath and exhaled it loudly. "All right, then. We should start finding our way back soon."

Riku nodded again. He wouldn't look up from the floor. "Yeah."

Axel took in Riku's somber expression and averted his gaze. He still wasn't good at comforting. Probably never would be.

After reaching the dorm, they finished their last-minute packing, and got in their separate cars.

Axel didn't turn on the engine till Riku was long gone.

**-May, end**


	10. June

**Author's Notes: **_Very_ short chapters from here on out. Things are quickly drawing to a close.

I'm still reeling from all the praise! Holy wow. I blush, I really do. Thanks again, everyone. Also, check out the art gifts I've been given and comment on them! Links can be found in my profile. :D

Hereafter is June, in which we miss those who are gone and remember their influence.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter ten- June**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

It had been easy, the first couple of weeks. Surrounded by the sights, sounds, and smells of his beloved hometown, Axel was able to adjust. Things like colleges and dorms were pushed far back in his mind, and things like Roxas, his parents, and the rest of his friends took the forefront. Days passed like blurs with movies, outings, and video games—he didn't have the time to think of much else.

But every now and then, the memory of a certain someone flickered behind Axel's eyes. Something would remind him—it could be how a person moved, or an object, or bits of conversation. The memory would linger, and momentarily his smile would fall, until Pence or Hayner did something irresistibly funny and they'd all burst into laughter.

But it was later, when the initial thrill of being _home_ wore off, when everything settled into a comfortable pace and they took to lazing around in the heat. It was when Axel walked home alone, not so exhausted from the day—when he looked up and saw the night sky, and when he looked into the mirror. It was when he lay in bed and stared at the ceiling, dotted in little plastic stars, that the memories would surface and assault him.

In the dark, Axel would stay up and remember. He'd roll around and close his eyes, but it took longer and longer to sleep. He'd end up staring at the ceiling once more with a dead gaze, listening to the clock tick, and a strange heaviness would fall across his entire body. After several hours, he'd drift to sleep without knowing, and he'd wake up the next day quiet and lethargic.

One night, he forced his body to move and grabbed his phone. His fingers felt weighted but he dialed the number—the ringing broke the silence.

It rang for a long time. Axel sat on the edge of his bed, dressed only in gray sweatpants, and waited.

The line on the other end was garbled, but Larxene's irate voice eventually came through: _"Axel, what the hell? Just answer me that. Please. Then hang up and go to bed."_

He glanced at the clock. It was almost three. Time sure flew. "Yeah, uh," he started dully, "I'm working on it."

"_Then work on it _harder. _Good _night_."_

"Hold on," he said quickly. "Just talk to me for a little bit. C'mon, I'll owe you one."

Larxene gave something between a growl and a sigh. _"What is it?"_

Axel's green eyes rose to the ceiling. One of the stars Roxas had stuck on it so long ago was falling off. "Nothing. Just thought I'd, yanno, call a good friend."

There was a short pause. _"… It's about the kid, isn't it?"_

Larxene's logic was often true and just, although blunt and painful. She had been the one to prompt Axel to do something about Riku before they left on summer break. She said things that needed to be said, even when others were too afraid to say them.

So he sighed and told her what happened upon his and Riku's parting, about how they wouldn't call each other in order to think things through, and this was her sage, wise, all-knowing response:

"_You're a stupid shit."_

Axel blinked slowly. "… _That_ was uncalled for."

"_Do you know how dumb that was? You're sulking and moping all over the place now. Brilliant, really. Only, what? Two months to go? Great plan, Einstein."_

He turned defensive. "Hey, I have good reasons, all right?"

"_Oh, like what? Distance makes the heart grow fonder?"_

"No," he said, but kind of hoped that it would for once. "It's better than that. More important."

Axel would've bet money that Larxene rolled her eyes just then. _"Apparently, you already have this all figured out. So you don't need me. Good ni—"_

"Do you remember Sora?" he interrupted.

"_Axel, I swear—"_

He stood up from the bed and began to pace. Somewhere, deep in his core, he understood that he was talking more to himself than her. "I wanted Riku to make sure. That it was, yanno, actually because of me being _me_. Not just because I was the one there, and Sora wasn't. I mean, that makes sense, right? He gets to have an Axel-free summer and be around Sora, and he can think it through…"

Larxene huffed impatiently. _"Has it crossed your mind that maybe you won't like the end result?"_

Axel stopped abruptly and gazed at the room in front of him. It was dark, but he could make out some of the action figures posed on his desk. "Well," he said softly, "yeah. I just want him to really know first."

Honestly, it was for both of them. He didn't want a repeat of Roxas. The infatuation still had to be there, just as strong, even after so much time of so little contact. It couldn't slip away quietly, not like Roxas had. Axel wouldn't allow it. He had to see for himself, before it really started.

Axel flopped onto his bed with a groan. It bounced and squeaked.

A drawn-out yawn rang through the earpiece. _"You care for the kid a lot, don't you? Enough to let him figure things out on his own."_

The blankets muffled Axel's affirmative reply.

"_Well, I guess you deserve _some_ credit for trying, then."_

He smirked humorlessly. "But I'm still a stupid shit?"

"_Oh, yeah, definitely."_

He buried his face into the pillows.

As usual, Larxene was probably right.

* * *

Nothing had changed. When Riku had walked to the door, luggage in hand, he had looked around. The grass was still evenly trimmed and green. The mailbox was still white and wooden. The porch was still lit, as it always was at night, and the curtains were drawn closed. Inside the house was dark—Sephiroth slept early and woke early, something he had managed to ingrain into his son.

Riku had opened the door, brought his things inside, turned on some lights, and went about the task of settling into his home once more. The refrigerator was stocked with the same food, his father still used a note to welcome him back, and his room was exactly as he had left it.

He wasn't exactly sure what he had expected. He'd spent this summer like he did all the rest—seeing Sora when he could, being courteous with his father, and waiting for the semester to roll around so he could leave again for campus. There was no reason to do otherwise.

But sometimes Riku would sit on his bed and flip his cell phone open and shut. The little screen would glow blue on his face, illuminating the numbers, but no matter how long he'd stare at it, it'd never ring.

He saw Sora more often during the summer, along with other friends that had returned. Tidus and Selphie came back from their colleges, but Wakka had a job in another city, so he sent e-mails wishing them well.

Sora still had his big blue eyes and wild brown hair, and he still had to climb onto a chair to be taller. He smiled widely at Riku and took Kairi's hand as they all walked to the movies with him in the middle. Riku watched them swing their joined hands back and forth as they laughed, while he stuck his own into his pockets.

Sora and Kairi were good together, and it still hurt.

Nothing had changed.

The weather grew hotter with each passing day. Sora wore his stupid shorts, Kairi wore her cute skirts, and Riku keep wearing his baggy jeans. Some days it was so stuffy and humid that they all stayed home with a television to keep them company.

Riku lounged on the couch and flipped through channels, but nothing caught his interest—he wasn't really paying much attention to it. The air conditioner was set to high. Although inside the temperature was cold, the humidity seemed to permeate the room, making him feel slow and tired. He always did prefer winter to summer.

Sighing, he shut the T.V. off and slouched into the cushions. His cell phone sat on the glass coffee table, motionless and quiet. His gaze repeatedly flickered to it.

Sephiroth was at work and wouldn't be home for several hours. The house was large and empty—if Riku bothered to talk out loud, he'd probably hear an echo. Sora liked hearing that echo.

Riku glanced at his phone again.

He wasn't sure why he kept it with him wherever he went, even to the kitchen to grab a snack. Maybe someone would call. He didn't want to miss it if they did. It might be Tidus, or Cloud, or Sora, or even—

He was looking out the sink window and washing the dishes when he thought of it. The words came unbidden into his mind, sliding in when he least expected:

_Cold milk on a hot summer day._ _I'm thankful for that. _But ice cream was better, because it was frozen and milk wasn't.

Riku shook his head. He looked out the window again, saw the grass being watered—

_Sprinklers are for the grass, _and_ for running through._

Later, when Sephiroth came home to see his son standing in his swimsuit near the sprinklers, he blamed it on the heat. They stood and stared at each other, until Sephiroth raised an eyebrow, cleared his throat, and told Riku to not track water into the house.

Slowly, other instances occurred. Riku would be going about his normal way: Sora would be with him, they'd be hanging out, and a thought would grow in his head about a Christmas play or something irrelevant. One day he bought a_ Nobodies_ CD on a whim, and soon after that he purchased a gift for Father's Day with relative ease. Another day he was with Sora and Kairi at the mall, and Kairi mentioned getting new undergarments. A laugh bubbled up in Riku's throat without his intention and they glanced at him curiously, but he only waved a dismissive hand and said it was nothing.

One night he sat on the couch, sketchbook on his lap. Riku had been practicing almost everyday—the pages were filled with rough outlines. Drawing calmed and relaxed him, and also freed his mind.

A shadow fell across him. He tilted his head back and saw his father towering over him, the elder's eyes studying the page. Various positions and angles of hands were displayed in sketchy detail.

Sephiroth appeared thoughtful. He looked at the drawings for a moment longer, then nodded and simply said, "Those are good," and walked away.

Late in the month, Sora, Kairi, Tidus and Riku sat in _Wendy's_ with their ordered food. The table was small and square—on one side sat the happy couple, while on the other were Tidus and Riku. Tables around them were mostly vacant.

Sora and Tidus were talking about some sport game that Riku hadn't watched. He was more concerned with the watery soda in his cup, anyway.

"Aw, man," Tidus crowed, devouring a fat fry, "it was like WHAM. He went down so quick. It was crazy."

Kairi sipped at her soda, unconsciously chewing on the straw. Some of her pink lipstick was smeared on it. "I don't know how you guys can watch that stuff. It looks so boring."

"Some of it is," Sora admitted as he unwrapped his cheeseburger and took an enormous bite. "But it's _great_ when—"

"Sora! Would you at least chew and swallow before you talk?"

Tidus answered for the brunet by sticking out his tongue and revealing the remains of his fry. Kairi held up her hands to block the view and proclaimed how gross it was.

That was when Riku tried his drink. His face almost mirrored Kairi's right then.

_They call it a suicide for a reason._

"Like watered down Coke," he murmured. Maybe he had mixed it wrong.

"Huh?" Sora said, blinking at his best friend. "What is it?"

Riku looked up and saw everyone watching him. "Uh, it's nothing."

"Speaking of nothing," Tidus cut in, drawing their attention, "there's _nothing_ to do here! I never knew home was so _boring_ till I left for the inner city. You guys know what I mean?"

Sora shrugged. "I guess. What do you think, Riku?"

Their eyes shifted to him again—Tidus with his light blues; Kairi with her innocent gaze; and Sora with his wide, happy ones.

And for a moment, Riku imagined a bright, sharp green.

"Well," he started quietly, "I heard once that life is as exciting as you make it."

Tidus cocked his blond head to the side. "Uh… all right."

"I think that's a good philosophy," Kairi said, nodding sagely.

Sora's eyes didn't move from him; the look in them was indiscriminate. Riku returned to his ruined soda as the conversation took another turn.

Sora wasn't as oblivious as most people thought.

**-June, end**


	11. July

**Author's Notes: **I say thank you like every time, and I'm going to _keep_ saying it! So thank you for sticking with me—just one chapter left after this.

Some people have mentioned they're interested in seeing the self-made soundtrack for this story. The playlist will be posted in the last chapter—do with it what you will. :3

Also, I hope I did this right.

Before you lies July, in which we come to terms.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter eleven- July**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

The night sky was perfectly still and silent, until it exploded.

Colorful streaks whistled high into the air and burst loudly, blooming and spreading. They fizzled and crackled as they fell, illuminating the countryside, and the colors tinted their surroundings. Left behind were billowing clouds of smoke.

Axel raised a hand and splayed out his fingers as one firework erupted. His skin was briefly colored green; another popped and turned it pink.

He sat on the porch steps of Hayner's home, a quaint wooden house in the country, as his friends ran around the expansive yard. Olette chose which fireworks came next, Pence and Roxas set them up on the ground, and Hayner used a lighter to send them flying.

Hayner scattered away from a lit firework; he said something and Roxas doubled over laughing.

Axel had been helping them before, but he had told them he was a little tired and that he could watch from the porch.

Red sparkled in the night air from between his fingers. His hand closed, and in his mind's eye, he captured it.

He leaned back, sitting on the middle step with his elbows propping him up, and closed his eyes. The high-pitched whistle and _bang_ of the celebration continued. He didn't hear Roxas approaching him until the blond plopped onto the top step.

"Taking a short break," Roxas said, smiling. "You wanna go help now?"

Axel opened his eyes lazily. Hayner, Pence and Olette kept up their assembly line. "Nah, I'll stay here."

Roxas shrugged. "Okay, but you're missing out."

The fireworks swallowed the silence. Roxas clasped his hands, elbows resting on his knees, and looked at his shoes while Axel cracked his back. A blue firework exploded; it lit up them and the porch.

"Hey, Axel?"

Axel's head rolled back and up to look at Roxas.

The blond swallowed nervously and found his sneakers very interesting. "You've been acting weird lately." His brow furrowed. "Well… weird_er_."

Axel stared at him with a flat expression. "Thanks," he deadpanned.

Roxas shot him a stern look. "I'm serious."

"Hard to tell."

"_Axel_."

Axel waved a hand; a _pop_ and _sizzle_ nearly covered up his voice. "All right, all right."

Roxas sighed and slumped forward, picking at his nails. "I was just wondering… it's not because of me, is it?"

Axel's eyebrow rose. Roxas had that expression that said there were things on his mind. The redhead guessed he could've been acting better—he hadn't meant to make Roxas or anyone worry. It just got sort of hard at times. "Naw," he said lightly, "it's not you."

"Oh," Roxas said, releasing a breath he hadn't known he was holding. "That's good."

This time the firework was purple. It flowered and twinkled. Hayner yelled something, Pence yelled back, and Olette looked annoyed.

Roxas took another deep breath, rubbing the back of his neck. "Do you, uh," he stammered, "do you think we'll… ever be like we were before?"

Axel understood the unspoken words: _before we messed up._

He looked at his friend and saw how the bursting fireworks tinted Roxas's blond hair. He remembered having that blond head lying on his lap while they watched a home movie, and he remembered the spot behind Roxas's ear that was good to touch.

So he answered truthfully: "No."

Roxas's face fell.

"But I bet we can get real close."

It took a moment for Roxas to get it. But he did, and he smiled slowly, punching Axel playfully in the arm. The redhead returned it.

"Hey, guys!"

They glanced forward and saw Olette waving enthusiastically. She ran toward them, followed by Hayner and Pence. They each took a seat on the steps: Hayner next to Roxas, Olette between Roxas's feet by Axel, and Pence on her other side.

"You two looked so lonely," she explained. "Thought you could use the company."

Axel smirked. "You left the noisy, exploding fireworks for us? I'm so touched."

"Hayner burned his thumb, so we had to," Pence supplied, nodding at the ailing blond.

"It's no big deal," Hayner said defensively, holding the injured appendage. "It was just one little spark."

"You shouldn't use a lighter," Olette admonished. "You burn your hand every time we do this."

"He's just accident-prone," Pence supplied. It got him a kick in the back. "Ow! Geez, Hay—"

"Serves you right."

Olette frowned. "You guys, be nice."

Axel and Roxas exchanged amused glances.

"Oh!" Olette stood suddenly, clapping her hands together. She clamored up the stairs to her purse, which sat near the door. "We need a picture still!"

"Oh, yeah," Pence said, standing and brushing off his jeans. "I'll set it up."

Olette handed the camera over, and with little protest (they were used to this), they gathered before the porch. Axel stood between Hayner and Roxas, one arm slung around each boy's shoulders, and Olette knelt daintily in front of them. Pence put the camera on the railing, positioning it right and peering through the lens, before setting the timer and jogging to take his place by Olette.

The camera clicked: one… two… three… and—

Axel's grin was wide.

—_flash._

* * *

On Riku's twentieth birthday, his friends took him out. They ate pizza, saw a movie, and then went to the mall. In all honesty, it wasn't any different from a normal outing, but that was what they enjoyed so it was all right. Although, it did involve giving Riku happy wishes, which he tried to brush off.

In the evening they brought him home and revealed their presents. (Riku always insisted that they shouldn't bother, but they never really listened—besides, what harm could a new CD or book do?) There was no cake, but there was junk food and video games and companionship, which was all any of them could ask for.

They trickled out one at a time. Selphie left first, hugging Riku and kissing his cheek before bounding out the door. Tidus soon followed with a salute, and after him went Kairi, who hugged both Sora and Riku and told them to have fun. Sora stayed into the night, claiming that he and his best friend hadn't spent time alone together in far too long.

Sephiroth was upstairs sleeping, having wished his son a happy birthday. The gifts he had bought hadn't come wrapped, but they had been unveiled and given. He hadn't stayed to watch for long—he understood his presence was daunting.

It got late enough that Sora decided to call his parents and tell them he was sleeping over. He borrowed a pair of Riku's old drawstring pants to sleep in, along with a worn undershirt. Riku changed into his pajamas, long-sleeved and cotton, and they settled into the beanbag chairs for another round of fighting games.

When Sora played video games, he was extremely animated. Not only did he press left, he swung his entire body left. He jammed on the buttons with vigor and muttered encouraging phrases at his character: "C'mon, c'mon, you can do it—dodge, dodge, _dodge_!" His favorite move was to rapidly tap the triangle button, which resulted in a series of quick jabs that Riku called cheap.

Now, Riku didn't play video games too often, although he did enjoy them with friends. But if there was one game he had gotten good at, it was _Soul Calibur II_.

His character, a tall blond named Nightmare with a massive sword, took one swing and knocked Sora's dark-haired girl screaming across the arena. Nightmare muttered something and struck a victory pose.

Sora huffed. "Next match."

Riku smirked and picked his character again. The television was their only light. "We should sleep soon."

"_One_ more match, then we can sleep."

They'd stay up talking, and they both knew it. "Okay, okay, one more."

Their fighters selected, the duel began—Taki, Sora's girl, dashed across the screen to avoid being cleaved in two.

The _tap-tap-tap_ of buttons, vicious combos, and battle cries continued through the first fight. Their eyes were glued to the screen, not a thought given to much else. But it was near the end, when Nightmare was about to be victorious, when Sora said:

"You're happy, right, Riku?"

Nightmare stopped all movement and fell victim to Taki's weapon.

Riku was staring at Sora now, his controller almost forgotten. "Huh?"

Taki delivered her victory phrase and Sora straightened, satisfied. The beanbag chair squeaked. He didn't look over. "I asked if you were happy or not."

Round two began. Nightmare wasn't quick enough to act.

"I, uh…" Riku began, aqua eyes shifting between the game and his friend. "Yeah."

Sora almost stood up in his button mashing, but he plopped back down. The beanbag made a _poof_ noise. "Yeah what?"

Nightmare wasn't doing too good. "Yeah. I'm happy."

Taki finished him with a throw, winning the match. "Are you sure?"

Riku looked down at the black controller he loosely held. His bangs hid his eyes.

Sora let out a loud sigh and set the controller down. He glanced over with a concerned frown. "Riku."

Riku didn't lift his head. His thumb idly played with the analog stick, moving it aside and letting it snap back. "I'm fine," he said.

_So, how long have you liked him?_

_A while. But I don't think he's ever noticed._

Sora regarded him carefully, placing a hand on his shoulder. Sora's hand had a wide palm; it was warm. "Riku," he started slowly, "you're my best friend. You know that, right?"

_You miss him?_

… _Yeah._

"I know," Riku said quietly. "You're mine, too."

_Sometimes… sometimes I get this feeling._

Sora's grip tightened. "And you know… that no matter what happens between us, I want you to be happy. Right?"

_Like I'm restless._

That was when Riku finally looked up. There he saw Sora—cute, lovable, caring Sora—wild brown hair and blue, blue eyes, dressed in an oversized shirt and pants; and he also saw there, the months and years of ache for the unreachable, the quiet dark nights of too much thinking—he saw Sora's smile as he took Kairi's hand, he saw Sora's pout as he toiled over homework, he saw all the times when being only a friend wasn't _enough_, and then, and _then_—he stopped. He just _stopped_.

And he looked again.

This time, he saw Sora, his worried best friend with a hand on his shoulder.

Riku's throat felt tight. "I know. I know."

Sora's smile came unsurely. "Okay."

Riku ran some fingers through his hair. His breath was shaky, like his voice. "Okay."

Sora stood slowly and offered his hand. "Come on, Riku. Let's get some sleep."

Riku stared at Sora's hand.

He breathed in, and took it.

* * *

Late in the month, Riku stood on the porch of his home, against the railing, and watched the night sky. The stars were out, bright and bold, and the moon gave him what little light he needed. The houses across the street were dark and sleeping.

_It's not so bad here._

There was a creak, and he looked over his shoulder to see the front door opening. Sephiroth stepped outside, still in his dress pants and shirt, his hand still on the knob.

"Come inside soon," he said gruffly. "Don't catch a cold."

The night was warm. "All right," Riku said.

_You've got a lot of good stuff going on._

Sephiroth nodded, appeased, and turned to leave. The door began to shut.

Riku called after him softly: "Dad?"

Sephiroth turned back around. From his height, he had to look down to see his son. His mouth was in a perpetual frown, and he stood perfectly straight. "Yes?"

_Maybe if you looked around a little…_

"Um," Riku said, glancing down at the porch's floor. His long hair covered his face. "… Thanks."

… _you'd see that, too._

Sephiroth made the barest of motions with his head. He stared for a while, before nodding once and answering, "You're welcome."

He left, and the door shut silently.

Riku looked back to the stars. He thought about his friends, he thought about Sora, and he thought about the coming month.

And so, finally, he knew:

He was capable of moving on.

**-July, end**


	12. August

**Author's Notes: **This is it, guys. Here's the last chapter—it's more like an epilogue than anything else. It might not be what some were hoping for, but it feels right and it goes with the theme. :3

Well… I've grown up over the past few years, partly because of other people and partly because of myself. Therefore, "Good Enough" is dedicated to the people that have come and gone, and especially the ones that are still here.

A lot of myself was poured into this fic. I'm so glad it was well received, and also that the AxelRiku fandom has grown. It _will_ continue to flourish, by golly!

I said I'd post the soundtrack, didn't I? I won't list it here, but what you _can_ do is go to my writing journal (it's linked in my profile). Beneath the Friends Only post will be the only other public one—this will have the soundtrack listed, along with lyrics and available downloads for easy access. Lyrics don't necessarily have to fit—I used the music to set my mood for scenes.

Enjoy!

Lastly, thank you—again—for the support.

Without further ado, I present to you _August_, which needs no explanation.

**"Good Enough"**

**chapter twelve- August**

by: Rosalyn Angel

-

In August, nothing special happened.

Days passed normally. The summer heat and late nights melded them together into one long stretch of time. It was easy to lose track—they often asked others whether the day was Friday, Saturday, or otherwise.

But in the last week of the month, the days became startlingly clear.

Friends broke up to return to their respective colleges. Things were packed and loaded into cars and goodbyes were exchanged. It was now an old, familiar routine.

Axel didn't need help moving this time. He managed to cram all his stuff into his jeep, and he even had all the directions memorized. He knew precisely which turns and exits to take.

The drive felt long. Each mile marker he passed on the highway caught his attention. They counted down one by one.

His cell phone sat in the cup holder, and his hand itched to use it.

* * *

Traverse University had it all.

Riku stepped out of his car, and looked up.

The trees were still mostly green, but autumn would soon change them. The lawn in front of the main hall was newly manicured, and the fountain had seen its yearly maintenance. The college was empty of its usual population—it was the earliest they were accepting on-campus students—but there were a few people here and there, checking their schedules and buying their books.

The main hall entrance, in all its glory, stood straight and tall as it always did. Its columns were still smooth, and the flagpoles in front still shone.

It was the same sight that greeted him the year before and the year before that—there was no great change to its structure. The air was still crisp, the breeze was still small, and the sky was still cloudy and blue.

Riku locked and shut the car door, pocketing the keys. There were a few things to be done before he could settle into his new room.

He took one step forward. His shoes scrapped against the pavement.

Nothing around him had really changed.

And then, his phone rang.

He paused and blinked, glancing down at his jean pocket where the phone buzzed and Aladdin serenaded him. He didn't move for a moment, just staring, wondering who it could be, daring to think that it was—

He pulled it out. The name read in bold: **Axel**.

It rang in his hand. The vibration was odd against his skin.

He flipped it open slowly and brought it to his ear. The word was released with an exhaled breath, the same greeting as always: "Hey."

Axel's answer was, as always, _"S'up."_

In the phone's background Riku could hear cars and other people. There was no hum of a nearby engine, though; just the brief roar as other cars passed. Axel was outside—maybe on a sidewalk.

Riku could hear him breathe.

There had been so much on his mind, but now none of it came.

"_Where are you?"_

The question was unexpected. "Huh?"

Axel's chuckle was quiet. _"I asked where you were."_

"Uh…" Riku looked up at the building before him. "On campus. The main hall entrance."

"_Outside?"_

"Yeah," he murmured, studying every detail of the entrance—every chipped brick and every intricate design.

"_Gotcha."_

He thought about what he'd say. He thought about how it'd happen.

Riku could hear Axel's quickening footsteps. His sneakers fell heavy and loud against the concrete.

"_How was your summer?"_

Riku lowered his head. Silver bangs fell into his eyes, and his hand cradled the phone close. "It was okay."

Another chuckle. More footsteps. _"Glad it's over?"_

He nodded, even though Axel couldn't see. "… Yeah."

"_That's good."_

His breath caught, but he didn't know why. There was silence.

Axel didn't stop walking. Riku listened.

"… _I'm glad, too. It was nice and all, but…"_

Axel's voice was sincere and sedated. Riku heard him mutter an excuse to someone before he continued.

"… _I thought a lot. Well… I couldn't _stop_ thinking, actually. I guess that's a good thing. That's a good thing, right?"_

Riku smiled, but only briefly. He stuck his free hand into his pocket. "What'd you think about?"

There was Axel's usual laugh. _"Isn't that much obvious?"_

Something bloomed in Riku's chest. It was light but compact, and it made it hard to breathe. His entire body felt the need to move—anything to let loose the energy that was beginning to course its way through.

So he walked. He walked onto the grass and across the lawn, not fast but not slow. The fountain, stone gray and water spraying, was up ahead.

"… I thought a lot, too," he said quietly. The words were, at start, hard to say, but after the first syllable came, the others followed with ease.

"_Oh?"_

"Yeah," he said, watching the ground. The grass crunched under his feet. The sound of trickling water became closer. "I thought about here."

_I want to get out. Go somewhere else—_

"_What about here?"_ Axel sounded hushed.

Riku remembered the dorm. He remembered room number 214 and the bunker bed inside. He remembered the wooden floor and the small bathroom they had fought over.

Riku remembered the blanket Axel had taken. He remembered how Axel had rolled it up under his arm and how he had fanned it out across the grass.

Riku remembered the stars.

"That it's not so bad," he said slowly.

There was no answer—just more footsteps.

He met the fountain's edge. Looking over, he saw his reflection wavering in the pooled water. "After all," he murmured, "everyone's here."

In his mind's eye, there were people. Each person had a little space all to themselves—a private corner reserved solely for their memory.

In one corner, there was Demyx. His eyes were bright and vibrant as he shouted at a concert, jumping up and down, excited and alive—and then there he was with Seifer, and Yuffie, and Luxord and Zexion, all together in a band that idolized another, playing hard and long and loving every moment.

In another there was Naminé. She, sitting so calmly, swept a pastel across a page; adding color, adding intrigue—and then she glanced up, smiling her smile, encouraging, knowing, and always so understanding.

There was Ansem. He was a dark, cold figure, sitting at his desk—he peered intently over his work and documents, barely looking over. There he was, seemingly without acknowledgement or interest—but even then, he opened his door all the same, and if watched closely, there was the subtle hint of a raised eyebrow that showed he was listening.

Leon and Cloud were close together. It was strange, seeing them apart; one grew too used to the other. Leon had his stoic, grim face, and Cloud had his thoughtful one—both familiar and comforting, however far apart they became.

There was Kairi, sweet, red-haired, and giggling. There was Tidus, Wakka, and Selphie. There was his father, tall and forever present. There were other people, ones he had never met, those faceless but still with names and stories—Hayner, Pence, Olette, Larxene and Roxas.

And there was Sora, all blue eyes and brown hair, smiling with his hand reaching out.

_I want you to be happy._

Sora. Sora was there.

_Everyone's here._

"Riku?" _"Riku?"_

The voice was echoed through his phone, and then a hand was laid on his shoulder. Another blurry reflection formed beside his.

Riku turned around and was met with sharp, green eyes and red, spiky hair.

In a special little corner, all to himself, there was a person. This person grinned, joked, smirked, and laughed; he pulled him to his feet and made him sing along. This person took him out, took his hand—he took his mind and maybe more. This person—he made him _understand_ that—

The phones slipped away.

"Wanna help each other unpack?"

"… Yeah."

—that life right then, for all it was worth, for all the times and memories, for all the people that had come and gone—that it was okay. That it was good enough.

Yeah…

Axel grinned. "Awesome."

It was good enough.

**-August, end**

**"Good Enough"**

**April 11th - December 23rd**

**2006**

**fin**


End file.
